re: How many days a week do you consume alcohol?

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I just washed him (and his hair) because he was trying to escape without using soap.

What is my life?

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Very drunk. I considered videoing the conversations he was trying to have with me.

We shared a totinos pizza and then he looked in the fridge when we finished the whole thing and said "where's the rest of it?"

That's after the pizza stuck to the oven and he kept fussing at me to grab it with my HANDS. So I called him a tard and he cried laughing.

Also.. His pants were unbuttoned when we got home and I asked him why he's walking around with his pants undone (they button all the way where a zipper would normally be) and he said "because I hate people"....

....?

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