re: Got any good jokes?

A guy walks into a bar and sits down. After a few minutes, he starts dialing numbers, like on a telephone, but on the back of his hand. He then flips his hand over and starts talking into his palm. The bartender comes over and tells him that it's a very tough neighborhood and that he doesn't need any troubles from weirdos here.

The guy says, "You don't understand. I'm very high-tech. I had a phone installed in my hand because I was tired of carrying around the cellular."

"Prove it!" demands the bartender. So the guy dials up a number and holds his hand up to the bartender's ear. The bartender talks into the guy's hand and carries on a brief conversation. "That's incredible." says the bartender. "I never would have believed it!"

"Yeah!" said the guy. "I can keep in touch with my broker, wife, you name it. By the way, where's the men's room?"

The bartender directs him to the men's room. The guy goes in, and 5, 10, 15, 20 minutes go by, and he doesn't return. Fearing the worst, given the violence in the neighborhood, the bartender goes into the men's room and finds the guy spread eagle against the wall, his pants down around his knees and a roll of toilet paper shoved up his butt.

"Oh my God!? said the bartender. "Did the locals do this to you?"

The guy casually turns around and says, "No, I'm okay. I'm just waiting for a fax."