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Started By
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1
Posted on 9/24/19 at 4:24 pm to BlastOff
More effed up than Hector’s goat.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 4:30 pm to 19557LSU
Feel like I been shot at and missed and shite at and hit
Lord help us all but help me first
I wouldn’t kick her out of bed unless she wanted to frick on the floor
Only time I’d turn her down is if it’s face down
Well shite fire and save matches
Slicker than owl shite
Tail don’t wag the dog around here
Lord help us all but help me first
I wouldn’t kick her out of bed unless she wanted to frick on the floor
Only time I’d turn her down is if it’s face down
Well shite fire and save matches
Slicker than owl shite
Tail don’t wag the dog around here
Posted on 9/24/19 at 4:31 pm to GAFF
That boys so ignorant he couldn't find his arse with both hands.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 4:31 pm to GAFF
Scenery don’t change unless you’re the lead dog.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 4:55 pm to MountainTiger
quote:
No such thing. Unless we're talking about the weather or something.
LOL
You’re absolutely right.
And I was referring to the weather.
BTW I’m almost 70 and I still like to plow. Good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.
Just not as often as I use to.
Weatherwise or otherwise
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:09 pm to BlastOff
Grandfather used to say "Don't believe anything your hear, and only half of what you see". Also, "He's tight as a crabs arse"
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:19 pm to BlastOff
Harder than woodpecker lips
Colder than polar bear toenails
Lost like a bastard on Father’s Day
Colder than polar bear toenails
Lost like a bastard on Father’s Day
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:19 pm to Nicky Parrish
quote:
Good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.
That's another good one. My dad stills uses that one occasionally.
How about:
He couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:28 pm to MountainTiger
‘He’s so ugly, his mama has to tie meat around his neck to get the dog to to play with him’
‘I feel like I’ve been shot at and missed, shite at and hit’
‘I’m gonna slap you into next week’
‘I’m gonna slap the taste out your mouth’
‘I’m gonna knock the water out of you”
‘You’re soft as drug store cotton’
‘I feel like I’ve been shot at and missed, shite at and hit’
‘I’m gonna slap you into next week’
‘I’m gonna slap the taste out your mouth’
‘I’m gonna knock the water out of you”
‘You’re soft as drug store cotton’
This post was edited on 9/24/19 at 8:09 pm
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:32 pm to tonydtigr
On the shady side of an iceberg.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:48 pm to BlastOff
Don't worry about the mule, just load the wagon.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:55 pm to PawnMaster
quote:
'Don't let your bulldog mouth overload your puppy dog arse'
Baw has an alligator mouth and a hummingbird arse.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 5:58 pm to MountainTiger
quote:
He couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.
Good one
Reminded of a guy I used to work with.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 6:03 pm to Nicky Parrish
You're the one fricking this goat. I'm just holding the horns.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 6:24 pm to DeltaTigerDelta
My get up and go just got up and went.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 6:48 pm to IAmNERD
quote:
...doing pushups in the snow.
The titty is doing the push-ups?
So it's a brass push up bra then.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 6:53 pm to BlastOff
quote:
Never heard that one before, pretty sure he just made it up.
Nope
Keep your powder dry comes from the musket days and pretty sure he is not that old. Modern translation is don't rub one out early so you are ready for action tonight.
quote:
I’ll keep plugging away
From the old Dutch when you plug up a dam to keep the flooding at bay. In this case he is banging your wife multiple times and is letting you know so he is technically not lying. Will need pics of your wife to judge his game tho.
Posted on 9/24/19 at 6:55 pm to SEClint
quote:
"Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining."
Ripped off from "Outlaw Josey Wales" - at best the dude is middle aged, not old
quote:
"I'm the meanest son of a bitch in 9 parishes"
Old as WWII and probably serious, younger than that and just a Rebel without a Clue.
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