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re: So that was awkward
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:17 pm to yankeeundercover
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:17 pm to yankeeundercover
read it right after I posted. I've done worse. While scanning facebook I saw a girl announce that her and her husband were expecting. A few weeks later I see her at the gym and tell her congratulations. She then tells me they had a miscarraige. I no longer speak to women about themselves.
1
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:21 pm to rebeloke
A friend of mine passed away in 2006, and we all kept checked in with his long term girlfriend. Years later she is dating, and doing well. I ran into her friend at a bar, and she told me she was pregnant.
About six months later I ran into her and asked about the baby, and she told me she miscarried.
I felt like crap.
About six months later I ran into her and asked about the baby, and she told me she miscarried.
I felt like crap.
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:21 pm to jmh5724
The way you recover from that mistake is double down. Say "well did you know you are most fertile right after a miscarriage? So you should try again."
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:23 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
I was wondering who tony Robinson was 
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:31 pm to Walt OReilly
Years ago I was on the road working and my buddy and I had become regulars at this little bar down from our motel. One night at closing time the bartender invited us to go with her and her girlfriend to one of those byob after hours clubs. There was a live band with a singer in a white sequined suit and cowboy hat singing David Allen Coe. Sounded just like David Allen Coe. Looked just like David Allen Coe. I'm pretty drunk and burning the illicit fuels as well. When I go to the bar to buy a mixer I ask the girl, "Is that really David Allen Coe?" She gives me the coldest look I've ever seen and says, "No, that's my momma."
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:31 pm to rebeloke
Tony Robbins is one of the most impressive individuals ive ever met. He was so positive, and took time to talk to me and encourage me in our brief meeting and made you just want to be around the guy
Then he had me Jot down my address on a business card and a month later arrived a bunch of his motivational material
I thought for sure he was just bullshite me, but he took the time to send me free stuff after I met him, and I heard he does that with everyone he has a chance encounter with. Dude is an expert people person
Then he had me Jot down my address on a business card and a month later arrived a bunch of his motivational material
I thought for sure he was just bullshite me, but he took the time to send me free stuff after I met him, and I heard he does that with everyone he has a chance encounter with. Dude is an expert people person
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:33 pm to shinerfan
quote:
Looked just like David Allen Coe. I'm pretty drunk and burning the illicit fuels as well. When I go to the bar to buy a mixer I ask the girl, "Is that really David Allen Coe?" She gives me the coldest look I've ever seen and says, "No, that's my momma."
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:35 pm to shinerfan
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:39 pm to shinerfan
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:40 pm to shinerfan
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:42 pm to KBeezy
Dude sales motivation to couch potatoes at 2 in the morning.
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:50 pm to rebeloke
My birthday party this month. My friend is dating a black girl whom we met for the first time at my party (well we actually realized we'd met at my previous birthday party backstage at a concert but she didn't know friend then). Anyway, my dogs are walking around greeting everyone and being super sweet.
Male dog goes up to the girl and she pets him. Everything fine. Then starts growling at her. He'd never bite but it was so blatantly obvious he's a racist a-hole.
Two days later, I'm at the ATM and he does the same thing w the black securty guard who was petting him. I tried to tell him the dog doesn't like uniforms, citing the mailman and UPS man as examples, but I accidentally said, "you know, because the mail man is bl..." I stopped short and we just stared at each other for what felt like eternity. I broke it with, "Well, have a good day, man."
Ouch.
Male dog goes up to the girl and she pets him. Everything fine. Then starts growling at her. He'd never bite but it was so blatantly obvious he's a racist a-hole.
Two days later, I'm at the ATM and he does the same thing w the black securty guard who was petting him. I tried to tell him the dog doesn't like uniforms, citing the mailman and UPS man as examples, but I accidentally said, "you know, because the mail man is bl..." I stopped short and we just stared at each other for what felt like eternity. I broke it with, "Well, have a good day, man."
Ouch.
Posted on 11/18/14 at 11:59 pm to McLemore
I remember when we were kids some lady with a hairlip called the house for something and my sister thought it was one of her friends playing a joke so she started talking to her with her pronounced fake hairlip voice.
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:01 am to McLemore
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:15 am to John McClane
When I was in college(flight school) I flew home for a Mardi Gras ball. Got shite hammered. Woke up the next day and boarded the plane to go back to FL super hung over. As we took off I had the urge to vomit, I searched my seat for a sick-sack but there was none. Made the decision to run the lav and barf. Flight attendant was yelling at me to sit down. DNGAF. I painted the airplane's bathroom. When I get back to my seat the guy across the aisle said "it's ok, not everyone is a flyer." I replied to him, "I'm actually a pilot... Just partied hard last night." Flight attendant was not happy.
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:36 am to 650Pirate
quote:
I replied to him, "I'm actually a pilot... Just partied hard last night."
TFM
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:39 am to rebeloke
quote:
Dude sales motivation to couch potatoes at 2 in the morning.
Sells. And I'm no couch potato, but I use his and others' stuff
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:41 am to Jim Rockford
quote:
Church youth group. I managed to work my way over next to the hot girl. During the prayer, I tried to sneak out a silent fart that turned out to be less than silent.
That's literally the worst time to try one of those! The entire place is silent! High risk, no reward. 0 points for you. 10 bonus points for making me laugh though.
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:48 am to rebeloke
Asking the bank teller "when are you due?" OMG, she wasn't pregnant!!! 
Posted on 11/19/14 at 12:49 am to KBeezy
Does it really help?
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