Started By
Message

re: If you had a first time in your life "amazing connection" with a girl

Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:28 am to
Posted by SpqrTiger
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2004
9259 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:28 am to
quote:

If it's a real connection, and you can tell, ask her out by the end of tomorrow. Here's what you do. Invite her to something you want to do, on your terms. Make sure it's something fun and not something too "date"-ish. Mini-golf, bowling, a baseball game, go-karts, a concert, ect. Avoid dinner and a movie for now. Make sure it's something YOU want to do. If you try to blow smoke up her arse on the first date with a fancy dinner, she'll smell desperation from a mile a way. Grab food at a local joint you frequent (not too divey, but no where you couldn't show up to in shorts and a t-shirt) and just have fun with it. The key for this date is to show her that you're a fun guy who is relaxed enough to show her who he really is. This should make her a lot more comfortable with you and allow the two of you to get to know one-another while having fun.

DON'T CALL HER OR TEXT HER UNLESS YOU ARE ASKING HER OUT ON A DATE for the first couple weeks.


This is solid advice. I would say that the old three-day communication rule is pretty much dead in the instant communication age. You have about 1.5 days to make your move. When you call (I would call instead of text in this case), do it to ask her out. Don't stay on the phone too long. You want to save conversation and get to know you time for in-person. If you get into long texting conversations, it will be like the date took place on the phone, and guess what... no matter how interesting you are, you will run out of shite to talk about on a real date.

For a first date, avoid the dinner date. That's for later. Do something casual that can generate conversation, but remove all the attention from each other.
Posted by When in Rome
Telegraph Road
Member since Jan 2011
35540 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:32 am to
Honestly I don't think, out of all the things you can judge a person on, that the time period in which you wait to call/text really matters all that much. If a girl really liked the guy and he called/texted her right away, she would be excited. Girls like confidence, not silly elementary school games.

I'm convinced that guys just invented the time period thing as an excuse for post-initiation failure.
Posted by SpqrTiger
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2004
9259 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:32 am to
quote:

Never do a day date for a first date unless it's a sporting event or something manly.


This is also solid advice.

Lunch means you have a time limit to get back to work. You don't want the clock ticking on your date like that.

If you don't have to get back to work, your date will wonder WTF you do all day.

Evening activities are much better for dates. Lunch is what you do with friends and business associates. Evenings are YOUR time. You want to give your time to the things you are most interested in.
Posted by Brageous
Member since Jul 2008
107724 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:34 am to
I've always thought the whole time frame thing was a little overblown. Obviously he shouldn't text or call right after they met, but it's not like you need to wait it out to not look desperate. If you want something, you go after it. If she thinks it comes off as desperate then clearly it wouldn't have worked anyway.
Posted by LaBR4
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2005
50746 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:37 am to
Was The receipt paper out at the pump?
Posted by kingbob
Sorrento, LA
Member since Nov 2010
67064 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:38 am to
quote:

I've always thought the whole time frame thing was a little overblown. Obviously he shouldn't text or call right after they met, but it's not like you need to wait it out to not look desperate. If you want something, you go after it. If she thinks it comes off as desperate then clearly it wouldn't have worked anyway.



He was wanting to call at 8:00am the next day. If that's not desperate, I don't know what is

Waiting until that evening or the following day would be wise. It's not so long that she wonders if you're going to call her at all and not so quick that she assumes you're a desperate loser. Women think about that stuff. They OBSESS about that stuff. Remember, their brains are far more active than ours. All that time you spend turning your brain off, focusing on one thing, or thinking about sports, she's over-analyzing everything that has ever happened (or not happened) to her and everyone she has ever met.
Posted by Brageous
Member since Jul 2008
107724 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:39 am to
Kind of why I laughed at the 8 am part earlier in the thread. My previous post should be read with a little common sense

I think the following day would have been just fine. Just not at 8 in the fricking morning
Posted by USMCTiger03
Member since Sep 2007
71176 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:39 am to
In the line at Chevon? You must be hot.
Posted by LSUBoo
Knoxville, TN
Member since Mar 2006
101917 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:41 am to
quote:

Just not at 8 in the fricking morning


No, this is money... you just have to use that "You must be tired, because you've been running through my mind all night" line.
Posted by Happygilmore
Happy Place
Member since Mar 2009
1810 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:44 am to
at all the guys that have given advice.

one, i met my wife in bar, i was hammered and didnt even realize she gave me her number. when i woke up it was still on the screen as an inputted number with her name real small below. i said to myself "damn, that was her name"
then, as a first date, we did lunch...BOOM.
four years later, here we are, married and loving life.
Posted by Displaced
Member since Dec 2011
32710 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:45 am to
quote:

Waiting until that evening or the following day would be wise. It's not so long that she wonders if you're going to call her at all and not so quick that she assumes you're a desperate loser.


when i met my now fiance, we met during a mud run and had plans to meet later that night for drinks before we even went our seperate ways that day.

does that make me a desperate loser? how bout her? i think worrying about the "time frame" is what really seems pathetic.

like an earlier poster said, if you see something you want, just go for it.
Posted by link
Member since Feb 2009
19867 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:46 am to
quote:

If it's a real connection, and you can tell, ask her out by the end of tomorrow. Here's what you do. Invite her to something you want to do, on your terms. Make sure it's something fun and not something too "date"-ish. Mini-golf, bowling, a baseball game, go-karts, a concert, ect. Avoid dinner and a movie for now. Make sure it's something YOU want to do. If you try to blow smoke up her arse on the first date with a fancy dinner, she'll smell desperation from a mile a way. Grab food at a local joint you frequent (not too divey, but no where you couldn't show up to in shorts and a t-shirt) and just have fun with it. The key for this date is to show her that you're a fun guy who is relaxed enough to show her who he really is. This should make her a lot more comfortable with you and allow the two of you to get to know one-another while having fun.

DON'T CALL HER OR TEXT HER UNLESS YOU ARE ASKING HER OUT ON A DATE for the first couple weeks. You can respond to her texts and IM's, and call her back if she calls you, but don't initiate. Don't wait too long between doing so if you can avoid it or else she'll start to think you don't like her at all. Making her wait a little will make her wonder why you aren't calling and will make her interested in finding out (i.e. she'll be more attracted to you because women are weird).

If you have any more questions, feel free to ask. I followed these instructions when I had an instant connection with a girl I met at a bar one night (not that kind of connection). Over 3 years later and we're still dating.
jesus christ, bob. it's not that complicated. "if it's a real connection," then it doesn't really matter what he does, as long as he does something reasonable and sane, because she'll want it to happen too. it doesn't matter if he waits til noon, or 1pm, or 4:37pm, to text or to call...or if he takes her to a slightly dive-ish place, or a casual sit-down place, or to sit outside yogurtland. he could follow one, all, or none of the rules in the above paragraphs, and things would still work out "if it's a real connection." it's a little thing called true love, bob, and you can find it in line for 5 minutes at chevron at 2:00 in the morning.

quote:

Turn a woman down for sex once and she'll never turn you down again. It's a power play.
typical OT tripe. i turned a co-worker down for sex for very legit reasons that i thought she'd understand, and not only did she have no interest in taking me up on my raincheck offer, she was pissed and insulted i couldn't blow off an important meeting for her. yea i know it's because she's crazy, but bob, it takes a crazy girl to frick a dude at work.
Posted by Brageous
Member since Jul 2008
107724 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:48 am to
It's not desperate at all. You made plans to meet up when you met her that night so it was already planned.

Again, I think a time frame is somewhat useless but it should be thought about if you are an idiot calling at 8 in the morning

I mean unless you plan to meet up at the farmers market on a Saturday or something I guess. Or have an awesome pick up line like LSUBoo posted.
Posted by Fun Bunch
New Orleans
Member since May 2008
115685 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:53 am to
I really need some details on how one meets someone at a Chevron in line and makes a connection.
Posted by Displaced
Member since Dec 2011
32710 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:55 am to
they were buying the same brand of menthols.
Posted by Skillet
Member since Aug 2006
107537 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:56 am to
quote:

"amazing connection"


i'm not real keen on dudes using the word "amazing" in serious context.
Posted by LucasP
Member since Apr 2012
21618 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:56 am to
quote:

if you see something you want, just go for it.


Can't decide if this is good advice or justification for rape.....
Posted by Brageous
Member since Jul 2008
107724 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:56 am to
must have been waiting a while on someone to buy their cigs with food stamps

lucas:
This post was edited on 7/8/14 at 8:58 am
Posted by LSUBoo
Knoxville, TN
Member since Mar 2006
101917 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:57 am to
quote:

quote:

if you see something you want, just go for it.
Can't decide if this is good advice or justification for rape.....


Be aggressive, be be aggressive!
Be aggressive, not rape aggressive!
Posted by link
Member since Feb 2009
19867 posts
Posted on 7/8/14 at 8:58 am to
quote:

i'm not real keen on dudes using the word "amazing" in serious context.

i agree. i was going to give you an upvote, but it's important to wait 11 minutes after the time stamp of the post to upvote. however, you're allowed to downvote immediately. posters OBSESS about this stuff, so you have to be thinking on their terms.
first pageprev pagePage 4 of 9Next pagelast page

Back to top
logoFollow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News
Follow us on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram to get the latest updates on LSU Football and Recruiting.

FacebookTwitterInstagram