re: Getting Married on Saturday

Sam Kinison used to talk about the old 5 lbs a year trick, and then one day you got up and looked at her and screamed, "YOU LOOK LIKE YOUR frickING MOTHER!!!! AHH!!!!!!!AHH!!!!!AHH!!!!!!!"

Also, pussy will start tapering off after first year. First kid comes, it tapers off a little more. Second kids comes, and it's GONNNNWEEEEE!!!!!

Slowly stash some money that she can't find. You'll thank me later.

Also, keep the names of several damned good divorce lawyers in the back of your mind. Again, you'll thank me later.

Aside from that, coming from a 27 year veteran prior to divorce, good luck to you. You'll need it.