re: Longest you've gone without speaking?

Not really a long time without speaking story, but my favorite “silence” story is from a client golf tournament a number of years ago. One of our biggest clients, a national insurance company, had a tournament for a number of its regions in North Carolina. They invited a number of their law firms, including ours.

On the first day I was paired with some guys from Florida. I was telling jokes, did most of the “Jesus Christ Super Star” soundtrack, had them marching and doing some of the “Officer and Gentlemen” lines. We had a good time and posted good scores.

That night at cocktails and dinner I heard someone say that they were paired with Iona the next day. I heard the guys I played with that day say, “You’re gonna have a great time. He had us laughing all through the round.”

The following day I showed up and the other three guys came over to me and said hello. I barely spoke audibly and really just nodded, “hello” as I shook hands. I did not say a word during the front nine other than, “good shot”. I could see these guys looking at one another like, “This guy isn’t funny at all. In fact he’s kind of a dolt.”

After we got a bite at the turn and arrived at the 10th tee, I started my schtick and had them in stitches throughout the back nine. I told them that I had to “go silent” after overhearing the guys I played with the day before tell them how much fun I was.

Yes, I have a bit of a warped sense of humor.