re: Biggest Jerk move you have ever made

Back in my drinking days I did a lot of dickish stuff. I posted about this before, but I think it is appropriate in this thread. I was in my early 30s (well before I cared for animals):

I had just finished a 3 day jury trial and decided to go to Georgetown rather than back to the office. I was having a few drinks and saw a woman (mid 30s) sitting at the end of the bar looking as though she had just lost her best friend. I had the bartender send her down a drink and she came over to speak with me. I asked her what was wrong and she said that she had just put her 12 year old dog down.

Well, that’s all I needed to hear. I was not an animal lover then (although, I do love dogs now). I started spinning a yarn about how I had to put my (imaginary) dog down. I made up this story about how I had this “dog” for years; how it gave me unconditional love; how it brought me my slippers and the paper, etc. I went on for about 20 minutes.

She said, “He got too old and sick and you had to put him down?” I said:

“No, I was going on vacation and didn’t want to pay to have it boarded.”

She screamed and walked away from me.

I still feel bad about the event and the fact that I still chuckle a bit when I think of the story.