re: Freakiest girl you've been with?

Tl;dr: She bought me strippers in Manhattan to make herself jealous so she could get to her Thundercat freaky level

I was with a chick a few summers ago. Was in Manhattan with her before she moved back from her internship, brought her to her first strip club. She bought me dance after dance because she wanted to "make herself jealous so she could hate-frick me". Ended up gobbling me in the cab ride home, fist bumped the driver, tipped him extra for dealing with it. Made me wait downstairs while she got ready for me, called me upstairs, and chick broke out the crotchless panties, started taking tequila shots, turned on Skrillex "Wild for the Night" and let me diddle the fart box. Glorious. If I could have a choice of past partners to smash one more time, she's at the top of the list. She also wanted to bang in the top-floor observatory of the Chase building in Houston, on the way to the zoo one day, and we house-sit for rich suburban people that summer and just defiled people's homes. It was great