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re: Can we talk about "Rape Culture?"
Posted on 6/9/14 at 4:34 pm to tiderider
Posted on 6/9/14 at 4:34 pm to tiderider
quote:
rape is about girls who fail to look out for themselves? ...
If a person leaves for vacation and leaves their house unsecured and it gets broken into while they are gone, they have been robbed. But they didn't use common sense in preventing a crime.
If a girl goes and gets blitz drunk at a frat party and is subsequently raped, she is still the victim of a crime. But it isn't stupid or sexist to note that some basic common sense could have lessened the likelihood of the crime (and none of that removes any culpability from the rapist).
1
Posted on 6/9/14 at 4:48 pm to the808bass
If so many chicks hadn't cried wolf about getting raped while drunk just because they don't want to be labeled as a slut, we wouldn't be having this conversation.
Posted on 6/9/14 at 6:40 pm to Ghostfacedistiller
Is this the culture of self loathing women?
Posted on 6/9/14 at 7:27 pm to DosManos
quote:"Usually follows a state of inebriation wherein one person finds him/herself waking up next to someone that he/she would rather chew off his/her own arm than risk removing it and waking the fugly person." LINKquote:What's a "coyote date"?
Should a man be able to scream rape after a coyote date?
Posted on 6/9/14 at 9:49 pm to tiderider
quote:
rape is about girls who fail to look out for themselves? ...
Actual rape? No. "Regretting a poor decision" sexual assault? Yes.
The topic of the thread is about what feminists have coined as "rape culture", and the OP gave the example of the Occidental student who was expelled based on "she-said" in a situation of consensual sex.
The feminists' war against men by pushing the idea of "rape culture" has done nothing more than encourage more "less-than-honest" accusations from girls who regretted fricking a guy the next day.
If a girl drinks at a party, decides to have sex with someone, and regrets her actions the next day, she can file a sexual assault complaint with the university, and it is completely her word against his. The process by which some universities are determining blame, and, ultimately, deciding a young man's fate, is very one-sided.
In the Occidental story, the young man was not given the opportunity to cross-examine any of the witnesses during the university's process.. It was nothing more than a hearing, with one side presented, and a decision made to expel the guy.
He has since filed suit against the university, which he damn well should have.
She claimed she was too drunk to remember. She was in his room, dancing and making out with him, went back to her room with a friend, the guy texted her to come back, and she texted him asking "do you have a condom?" He replied "yes", and she proceeded to go back downstairs to his room to have sex with him. That seems pretty consensual to me.
How is that not consent?
Posted on 6/9/14 at 11:16 pm to City
The attitude about rape is definitely dependent on who's accused of the rape. I've seen on this very site comments calling the girl a slut or worse because as a minor she had sexual contact with an older student athlete who was prosecuted for his actions. Yet if a similar incident occurs elsewhere (FSU) for example the overwhelming disgust for the act is almost universal.
Women don't go to frat parties to talk literature for sure, but neither do most go to exclusively have sex. Rape culture is a stupid word and certainly our culture values the safety of all women, but how many times do you see the male child's sexual activities condoned or even encouraged and in the same family the female is expected to be the voice of reason and not be sexually active. In a post from last year a co ed at Ole Miss was photographed in bed with two guys from a fraternity. She was scandalized and branded a whore, while the men proudly went about their business. In college at a party a few guys came up to me and said a train was being run on a girl. She had drank too much and was passed out, but never in anyway deserved or wanted that to happen. I kept thinking that the voice of decency would prevail with the men involved, but it didn't. It bothers me to this day that I didn't go and stop it. There was no excuse for them to do what they did or for me for not intervene.
Women don't go to frat parties to talk literature for sure, but neither do most go to exclusively have sex. Rape culture is a stupid word and certainly our culture values the safety of all women, but how many times do you see the male child's sexual activities condoned or even encouraged and in the same family the female is expected to be the voice of reason and not be sexually active. In a post from last year a co ed at Ole Miss was photographed in bed with two guys from a fraternity. She was scandalized and branded a whore, while the men proudly went about their business. In college at a party a few guys came up to me and said a train was being run on a girl. She had drank too much and was passed out, but never in anyway deserved or wanted that to happen. I kept thinking that the voice of decency would prevail with the men involved, but it didn't. It bothers me to this day that I didn't go and stop it. There was no excuse for them to do what they did or for me for not intervene.
Posted on 6/10/14 at 12:12 am to LaFlyer
quote:
In college at a party a few guys came up to me and said a train was being run on a girl. She had drank too much and was passed out, but never in anyway deserved or wanted that to happen. I kept thinking that the voice of decency would prevail with the men involved, but it didn't. It bothers me to this day that I didn't go and stop it. There was no excuse for them to do what they did or for me for not intervene.
If she was passed out drunk then she should have filed charges. She may have put herself at risk by getting pass-out drunk at said party, but she didn't deserve to get the railroad.
The situations that are being talked about here (at least I think that's what is being discussed) are ones where a girl and a guy, both somewhat intoxicated, engage in coitus. Then the next day (or a year later LINK), they regret the consensual sex they had, and file charges of sexual assault and claim they were too intoxicated to consent. Who decides the limit of consumption? Was there a third party present at the time of their sexual congress to verify the victim's cognizance before the act occurred?
The burden of proof is too great to ruin someone's life based on one regretful person's account. And in a situation such as the one at Occidental, where the girl texted the guy asking if he had a condom before going back to his room to have sex...how do you maintain that sexual assault occurred? She willingly went to his room, with the purpose of having sex..with text messages as proof. Yet, the young man was still expelled.
This post was edited on 6/10/14 at 12:14 am
Posted on 6/10/14 at 12:28 am to Ghostfacedistiller
No, you cannot have a discussion about it here. Might as well discuss politics with your dog.
Posted on 6/10/14 at 12:50 am to Tigah in the ATL
quote:
No, you cannot have a discussion about it here. Might as well discuss politics with your dog.
And thanks for your shite contribution to the discussion.
Posted on 6/10/14 at 8:19 am to City
quote:
The situations that are being talked about here (at least I think that's what is being discussed) are ones where a girl and a guy, both somewhat intoxicated, engage in coitus. Then the next day (or a year later LINK), they regret the consensual sex they had, and file charges of sexual assault and claim they were too intoxicated to consent. Who decides the limit of consumption? Was there a third party present at the time of their sexual congress to verify the victim's cognizance before the act occurred?
No doubt that occurs, but at the same time how many legitimate rapes occur that go unreported by the victim for fear of the backlash she will receive? Calling her a slut, saying she was drunk, saying she asked for it by going to a frat party or bar and drinking? It's a terrible crime for the victim, and it's a crime that is very difficult to prove in these particular situations, and they happen all the time on college campuses. Likewise, it's just as terrible for a male to be labeled a rapist when it was consensual, though drunken, sex.
I have no idea what "rape culture" means, but perhaps it relates to some of the callous statements made by a few in this thread. Not yours, mind you, but a few others.
Posted on 6/10/14 at 8:30 am to City
quote:
If she was passed out drunk then she should have filed charges.
In days of old she would have told her brother who would have rounded up a couple of his buddies then pummeled said frat boys into the ground.
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