Back in the day, a friend and I stopped in a Delchamps about 3am to get something to eat. We were so wasted that even fat girls from at least 4 Parrish's had shot us down. We got to play wrasslin' and I DDT'd him in the soup aisle. His head made a huge cracking sound as it hit the highly polished floor. He was out cold. I thought I killed him or at least made him a quadriplegic. I was scared. I ran to the front a told the cashier to call 911.
He had been playing possum the whole time. When I came back, he was gone. I was confused and walked to the end of the aisle. He jumped out from behind a Doritos display and threw a frozen Cornish game hen that hit me square in the nuts.
We ran. (He ran much faster than I) We pulled out of the parking lot at the same time the paramedics were pulling in.
Went to sleep drunk and hungry that night.
This post was edited on 1/6 at 4:21 pm