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Started By
Message
Lending/Giving Family Money?
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:21 pm
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:21 pm
Anyone have any thoughts? About to be around extended family off and on for a month - because I can hold down a job and live in a decent house, I always get hit up.
I swore after last year I wouldn't do it again - and told my wife that we'd just stay home if it was a problem.
I swore after last year I wouldn't do it again - and told my wife that we'd just stay home if it was a problem.
17
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:24 pm to anc
9/10 times this is a mistake.
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:26 pm to Cmlsu5618
I do it but hate it. Ppl need to learn how to hold on to money.
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:42 pm to anc
Don't do it.
Posted on 11/26/13 at 7:46 pm to foshizzle
I am glad no one has ever asked me for money in my extended family.
Posted on 11/26/13 at 8:05 pm to anc
"Why don't you just ask him for the money, Eddie? He sure as Hell can't take a hint!"
This post was edited on 11/26/13 at 8:05 pm
Posted on 11/27/13 at 1:11 am to anc
I told my fiance that we will never give family money. 99 times out of 100 its bad news.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 7:42 am to TigerTatorTots
I have in the past and I'm sure I will in the future, but I always consider it a gift. If I get paid back, thats great, but you have to go into it with the attitude of it being a gift or it can strain relationships.
So far I have always been paid back.
Also, these have always been relatively small sums ~ $200 or less. I would not loan a large amount expecting someone to make payments to repay the debt.
So far I have always been paid back.
Also, these have always been relatively small sums ~ $200 or less. I would not loan a large amount expecting someone to make payments to repay the debt.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 8:07 am to anc
I wouldn't. Has more bad outcomes than good. It's just not a good idea to mix family and money.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 8:39 am to anc
1. Never lend anything(money or no) to family you expect to get back.
My personal policy is to never lend money. I have been asked and explained sorry I don't lend money to anyone. I've turned down my dad and cousins before. Obviously if the circumstances were right I'd lend people whatever they needed but it's never something that's life/death or being tossed out on the street. Interesting enough I developed this relationship with my brother where he figured out asking me to bum him $20-50 works. I'm more comfortable just giving it to them.
My personal policy is to never lend money. I have been asked and explained sorry I don't lend money to anyone. I've turned down my dad and cousins before. Obviously if the circumstances were right I'd lend people whatever they needed but it's never something that's life/death or being tossed out on the street. Interesting enough I developed this relationship with my brother where he figured out asking me to bum him $20-50 works. I'm more comfortable just giving it to them.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 9:16 am to BeerMoney
can i borrow some beermoney?
Posted on 11/27/13 at 9:19 am to BeerMoney
quote:
I've turned down my dad
You must be an up tight SOB to turn down your ole man
Posted on 11/27/13 at 10:10 am to LSUTOM07
quote:
You must be an up tight SOB to turn down your ole man
Maybe his old man is a junkie
Posted on 11/27/13 at 10:30 am to anc
When brother and I were in our 20s and just starting married life money was very tight. One day brother's washing machine broke down. He called dad and asked for a $400 loan. Dad sent him a check and called me immediately:
Dad: Things have to be equal. Can you use a $400 loan for anything?
Me: Sure. I could put it toward a new fridge.
I sent him a $50 check every month for 8 months till the loan was paid back.
30 years later I visited him knowing he didn't have much more time on earth. We were sitting on the front porch in a couple of rocking chairs.
Dad: Do you remember that time when I loaned you and your brother $400?
Me: Sure.
Dad: You paid me back. Your brother didn't. I was very proud of you for that, son.
It still makes me feel good to think of that comment. And brother will never know about that conversation.
Dad: Things have to be equal. Can you use a $400 loan for anything?
Me: Sure. I could put it toward a new fridge.
I sent him a $50 check every month for 8 months till the loan was paid back.
30 years later I visited him knowing he didn't have much more time on earth. We were sitting on the front porch in a couple of rocking chairs.
Dad: Do you remember that time when I loaned you and your brother $400?
Me: Sure.
Dad: You paid me back. Your brother didn't. I was very proud of you for that, son.
It still makes me feel good to think of that comment. And brother will never know about that conversation.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 10:48 am to anc
If you can afford it, and you actually want to do it, give it to them. Never loan family money.
I have no problem helping people I know out with money, but habitual mooches get cut off.
I have no problem helping people I know out with money, but habitual mooches get cut off.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 11:07 am to anc
I agree with others in this thread about not loaning money to family. if you want to help then consider just giving them the money.
My sister needed a decent bit of money one time so I just gave it to her. Since then she has not asked for money again, but she is a productive member of society.
Luckily most of the rest of my family knows me well enough to know that they would get shot down and don't even bother asking if it is not life or death.
My sister needed a decent bit of money one time so I just gave it to her. Since then she has not asked for money again, but she is a productive member of society.
Luckily most of the rest of my family knows me well enough to know that they would get shot down and don't even bother asking if it is not life or death.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 12:12 pm to Zach
I needed some money a few years back. My dad gave me $20,000. I wanted to setup a written agreement and have a payment plan setup. He said he would not give me the money if he needed it to be repaid. He said he just deducts it from my part of the inheritance so that it is fair to my sister. If I pay it back thats great but it is not expected. I give him $200/ck until I have it all repaid.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 12:43 pm to Cmlsu5618
quote:
9/10 times this is a mistake.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 12:55 pm to ThatsAFactJack
quote:
I give him $200/ck until I have it all repaid.
And you're gonna feel great when it's repaid. So will he. Not because he needs the money. It's because he's proud of you.
Re: my son... he has never asked for a loan. But when Xmas and G'kids birthdays come up I always ask him what I should buy. The answer is always the same: "Dad, we've got toys all over the place. Just write a check for whatever you can for their college fund".
It's a La. state tax free college fund account. When my grand kids graduate from HS they can apply the money to college tuition to any school in La.
Posted on 11/27/13 at 1:38 pm to Cmlsu5618
quote:
99/100 times this is a mistake.
My broke dick brother in law has hit me/us up twice. I have never seen a dime.
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