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Message
re: Ever dated a girl with an eating disorder?
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:40 pm to theBOSSman!!
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:40 pm to theBOSSman!!
Force the discussion. Don't show any sign of weakness when talking about it.
Make sure she knows it is a terrible thing to be doing (do some research on it if you haven't already).
If she pushes you away then let it be on her.
She will likely be very good at dodging the discussion and/or denying that she has done anything.
Make sure she knows it is a terrible thing to be doing (do some research on it if you haven't already).
If she pushes you away then let it be on her.
She will likely be very good at dodging the discussion and/or denying that she has done anything.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:41 pm to theBOSSman!!
If a woman doesn't have an eating disorder she isn't trying
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:41 pm to theBOSSman!!
quote:
not gonna run just yet
Since your not gonna run. MY advise would be to hold her hair and PIIHB while she's bent over
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:42 pm to theBOSSman!!
No, but a friend's cousin died of it. She was smart, pretty, had everything going for her. Very sad.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:42 pm to theBOSSman!!
Weak gag reflex. IWNHI.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 12:55 pm to theBOSSman!!
quote:
but she said she rarely does it anymore and that it's no longer a problem. I know that's not the case because ever since she told me that all the signs have become obvious.
So she has no problem lying to you. Beware.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:06 pm to theBOSSman!!
All girls have eating disorders.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:07 pm to wheelr
Yep, she lies while destroying her body and has a mental problem.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:07 pm to theBOSSman!!
Bet she is a deep thoating mofo.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:15 pm to wheelr
Bits and parts of this are going to sound terrible.
First, yes. I have. Second, a lot of (I would hazard *most*, but that may be subjective to my experience), show signs of other mental issues-- for some it is obviously open crazy behavior; for others, it can just be something like super extreme rationalization.
My own experience was with a girl in college; she was a two-BJ a day girl, every day-- but no more or less, which I thought was fantastic- I wasn't going to be pissed if she didn't want a third. She was a bright, engaging personality that I also enjoyed being around, and was in the early stages of a biochemistry major.
I had my suspicions about an aversion to healthy eating habits, when I started to notice she'd avoid meeting up at mealtimes, or in those instances where she did agree, she'd invariably have a reason to leave very early. Something was always coming up that was urgent.
Anyway, its a super hard topic to bring up, if someone doesn't volunteer it; I spent a few weeks tiptoeing around the topic, trying to engage her in discussions about things like food, with no success at all. What broke it in my mind, was when were talking one night about intimacy, and why she enjoyed giving BJs so much, and she commented that it always made her feel better if she could get her daily protein, without having to worry about meals-- but she had to worry about portion control, so
Now, I know she wasn't as foolish as to actually believe that it was all the protien the human body needs, but she had an extended rationalization about why her behavior was 'helping' herself. That was the point I realized that she had a problem. Just to be sure, I started asking a few more hypothetical questions, to se what she could rationalize as acceptable, in unrelated things-- like, should the mentally retarded be sterilized, if so, is there a rational basis for sterilization of others, and so on. The leaps of logic she demonstrated in some of those were equally perplexing and worrying.
Yeah, I'm probably a terrible human being for not calling it quits right then, but the relationship was over in another month as I tried to encourage her to seek counseling.
First, yes. I have. Second, a lot of (I would hazard *most*, but that may be subjective to my experience), show signs of other mental issues-- for some it is obviously open crazy behavior; for others, it can just be something like super extreme rationalization.
My own experience was with a girl in college; she was a two-BJ a day girl, every day-- but no more or less, which I thought was fantastic- I wasn't going to be pissed if she didn't want a third. She was a bright, engaging personality that I also enjoyed being around, and was in the early stages of a biochemistry major.
I had my suspicions about an aversion to healthy eating habits, when I started to notice she'd avoid meeting up at mealtimes, or in those instances where she did agree, she'd invariably have a reason to leave very early. Something was always coming up that was urgent.
Anyway, its a super hard topic to bring up, if someone doesn't volunteer it; I spent a few weeks tiptoeing around the topic, trying to engage her in discussions about things like food, with no success at all. What broke it in my mind, was when were talking one night about intimacy, and why she enjoyed giving BJs so much, and she commented that it always made her feel better if she could get her daily protein, without having to worry about meals-- but she had to worry about portion control, so
Now, I know she wasn't as foolish as to actually believe that it was all the protien the human body needs, but she had an extended rationalization about why her behavior was 'helping' herself. That was the point I realized that she had a problem. Just to be sure, I started asking a few more hypothetical questions, to se what she could rationalize as acceptable, in unrelated things-- like, should the mentally retarded be sterilized, if so, is there a rational basis for sterilization of others, and so on. The leaps of logic she demonstrated in some of those were equally perplexing and worrying.
Yeah, I'm probably a terrible human being for not calling it quits right then, but the relationship was over in another month as I tried to encourage her to seek counseling.
This post was edited on 8/29/15 at 1:17 pm
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:16 pm to theBOSSman!!
I had a girlfriend that always wanted to deep throat me after a big meal.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:20 pm to BoardReader
My advice would be to get her help. A good friend of mine is actually a mental health specialist in eating disorders in New Orleans
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:23 pm to theBOSSman!!
It is a disease and it can be deadly. She needs an intervention.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:34 pm to Isabelle
It isn't that easy though. If I'm the only person she's been willing to tell and she still won't even talk to me about it then how am I supposed to get her help? She has to want to help herself first and I'm not sure that she realizes she needs it. I don't know how to make her realize this is a problem. I'm not going to talk to her friends or family about it as that would be a violation of something she told me confidentially and only make things worse. I want to help her but I worry that it may not be possible
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:39 pm to BRgetthenet
quote:
This post was edited on 8/29/15 at 1:40 pm
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:49 pm to Pectus
quote:
Yeah. She was a vegan.
What is wrong with that?
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:58 pm to theBOSSman!!
I have. IMO - Best thing you can do is go about like she never told you. Go on like business as usual. The fact that she opened up to you about such a thing is huge. It's usually the first step to controlling the issue. If you know anybody else in your life that has beaten an eating disorder - Then maybe you should ask her if she'd like you to put her in touch with that person. More than anything - She needs to not feel strange for having told you. These ppl feel like they need to be normal - even though they know on at least one level they aren't.
BUSINESS AS USUAL = best thing you can do for her.
ETA:
If she starts talking with you more often/more openly - THEN is when you start to discuss suggestions.
BUSINESS AS USUAL = best thing you can do for her.
ETA:
If she starts talking with you more often/more openly - THEN is when you start to discuss suggestions.
This post was edited on 8/29/15 at 2:02 pm
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:58 pm to theBOSSman!!
quote:
SO has bulimia and doesn't like to discuss it, what sort of action should I be taking?
Well, I mean if you don't mind her teeth rotting out from all that vomit before she is 40, than I say stick with it.
Posted on 8/29/15 at 1:59 pm to theBOSSman!!
My GF used to before I met her. She did lots of counseling to break it. It's mainly insecurity and control issues, which most people have really, they just deal with it differently.
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