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Message
re: Dating Morality Thread: Dating with No Intention of a Serious Relationship
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:54 am to SlowFlowPro
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:54 am to SlowFlowPro
SFP and I have a mutual female friend. She doesn't fit either of these two categories but definitively fits the topic. LOL
1
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:55 am to SlowFlowPro
I don't really see a problem with it. Males & females date people all the time that they see no future with. I think it has something to do with separation anxiety. Then when something better comes around. They'll drop the fling and move on.
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:55 am to Salmon
It's not necessarily a waste of time
The man wants a reliable sex partner and the woman probably wants some sort of emotional comfort as well
It's a business exchange essentially
The man wants a reliable sex partner and the woman probably wants some sort of emotional comfort as well
It's a business exchange essentially
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:56 am to TheFranchise
quote:
SFP and I have a mutual female friend
*scratches head*
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:57 am to SlowFlowPro
Not a problem if you're up front and honest about it.
I could never do it. I've never dated more than one woman at a time. I've never had any interest in dating someone if I didn't think it would lead to a serious relationship. Never been interested in casual sex.
But then again, I'm morally superior to all of you fools - as well as intellectually and financially superior.
I could never do it. I've never dated more than one woman at a time. I've never had any interest in dating someone if I didn't think it would lead to a serious relationship. Never been interested in casual sex.
But then again, I'm morally superior to all of you fools - as well as intellectually and financially superior.
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:57 am to Salmon
quote:
are they serious?
this is a completely subjective standard, but i think i found a good defining line
if you can walk away from the relationship (assuming no drama) without any care, it's not serious
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:57 am to Pilot Tiger
quote:
It's a business exchange essentially
which works if both are on the same page
but more times than not, eventually someone in the exchange will become more attached than the other and want it to become more "serious"
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:59 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
if you can walk away from the relationship (assuming no drama) without any care, it's not serious
gotcha
and I'll say that if you can walk away from a 2 year relationship without any care then you are pretty soulless
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:59 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
is is wrong to casually date in this instance when you have absolutely no intention of any sort of real commitment, other than an exclusive sexual relationship? is there a societal pressure, expectation, and/or meme that it is immoral? there is a pervasive theme of "wasting her time" or "leading her on".
Hell no it isn't wrong. Just be clear up front and explain how you feel. Any hurt feelings will be avoided.
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:59 am to SlowFlowPro
Depends if you are both on the same page about what's going on
Posted on 4/1/15 at 9:59 am to 911Moto
I've noticed that a few posters keep saying "if you are upfront and honest". How many of you have honestly had a conversation like this with someone?
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:00 am to Salmon
quote:
which works if both are on the same page
it works for the party who can walk away, also, but it may not for the other (esp without discussing it). that's why i framed this in terms of morality
i don't think you have a duty to tell the other person you don't "see a future" or however you phrase it
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:00 am to Salmon
quote:
because at some point it does become a waste of time if you are not "serious"
I don't get why it's a waste of time. If both are into it, not being misled in any way, and still enjoy each other's company, then it's ok, right?
Don't know how realistic that is but in theory if all the above criteria are met it would be ok.
This post was edited on 4/1/15 at 10:01 am
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:00 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
is is wrong to casually date in this instance when you have absolutely no intention of any sort of real commitment, other than an exclusive sexual relationship?
As long as you're up front about it there is nothing wrong with it. There is something wrong with the person on the other end thinking they can change you though.
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:01 am to JBeam
quote:
I've noticed that a few posters keep saying "if you are upfront and honest". How many of you have honestly had a conversation like this with someone?
yeah how does that conversation go?
"you do realize this will never be serious or ever approach a long-term relationship. don't ever bring up marriage or living together, either."
even if a girl said "OK" to that, there's a high likelihood that she thinks she can change your mind over time
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:02 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
i don't think you have a duty to tell the other person you don't "see a future" or however you phrase it
if you genuinely care about the person other than for sex, I'd say you have some type of duty to tell them of your intentions
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:02 am to SlowFlowPro
I seriously had this conversation
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:03 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
"you do realize this will never be serious or ever approach a long-term relationship. don't ever bring up marriage or living together, either."
I've had this conversation and the girl was the one that initiated it
I would never call what we did "dating" though
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:03 am to SlowFlowPro
I've told and have had several girls tell me they weren't looking for anything serious. NBD
Posted on 4/1/15 at 10:03 am to Pilot Tiger
i'm known to tell girls (esp younger girls) right before we bang that if she gets pregnant i'm not marrying her, to ease my moral conflict
...it's never led to no sex
...it's never led to no sex
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