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re: As a man it can be really hard to admit without looking weak

Posted on 9/21/19 at 11:39 am to
Posted by Vidic
Member since Jan 2010
9130 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 11:39 am to
If you weren’t so codependent on another person this would’ve helped. But instead you stuck around For a year (when you obviously knew she was fricked up) and now you’re in this situation. Let people go. Sometimes it’s better to be alone than to have someone like that as a companion
Posted by shallowminded
Member since Nov 2012
2738 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 12:48 pm to
If she threatens to kill herself have her admitted call 911. Here in Florida they call that getting baker acted. They will admit her into a hospital and treat her for her disease, it’s up to her if she wants the help.

9 times out of 10, people that say they are going to commit suicide don’t. They say it to get the attention..
Posted by tigersownall
Thibodaux
Member since Sep 2011
15355 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:39 pm to
I would take screen shots and send them to the authorities
Posted by Bigbee Hills
Member since Feb 2019
1531 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:44 pm to
I had a girlfriend once that did this stuff. She even threatened to run her car off the road into a tree with me in the passenger seat.

Save her messages, download a call recording app, then contact her family, LEO, etc. and GTFO. Call her bluff. She's more likely to kill you than herself: If ain't a knife to the spine then it could be an early death from the stress, because a crazy vagina is a chronic, long term disease for a man's psyche and can eventually kill him dead as a hammer.

Most likely the foundation of her "psycho'ness" is built upon 2 things: Desire for attention and narcissism. Both, especially coupled together, can make a schizophrenic look like a cake walk, and the latter almost guarantees (for the time being) that she won't pull the trigger on herself. Unfortunately the former is a very real risk factor: I know a girl (we all know multiple girls) who, for her whole life, craved attention. She attempted suicide several times, but in every attempt there was an obvious indicator that she didn't actually want to murder herself. She ravaged her family and friends' quality of life with her episodes until one day her extreme desire for attention coupled with a Russian Roulette scenario resulted in her blowing her head off in front her family.

Due to personal experience (i.e. coming close to killing myself and coping with episodes of extreme depression and hopelessness) and also from family & friends killing themselves, very few things piss me off like a selfish person talking suicide in order to gain attention and sympathy- and to the extreme psychological detriment of those who love & care for them. It's cheap, it's chicken chit and it stands on the graves of those who did it after losing all hope, and also on the struggles of those who are heading in that direction. What people like that don't realize is if ONE successful suicide was a result of "the boy who cried wolf" phenomenon then all of the faux suicide talkers have blood on their hands.

You start talking crazy talk with me and you're gonna get a swift reaction that involves family & friends, mental health professionals, law enforcement, etc., because not doing something when I had a chance is something I will not have on my conscience ever again. If it's faux suicide talk...well then, play stupid games win stupid prizes: You wanted attention, you're about to get it. Luckily, usually, professionals, intuitive people, and those who know what it's like to be afraid of themselves and can spot a possible fake, BUT you've ALWAYS got to ask and then take appropriate action from their feedback. If they say, "yes" after understanding the magnitude of what you're asking, then it's a code red situation.

Murder is murder, and if she was talking about murdering someone else then we wouldn't be so apt to sit back and take it in stride, and she, a normally functioning adult, would know what the reaction would be if she was talking willy-nilly about murdering someone. So why then do we sit back and wait when one talks of murdering their own self? It should be treated the same, and people should know that their cry for help will be immediately addressed out of worry, compassion and love.

Call her bluff and bring in a team of her people to help. Hopefully she'll fold her hand because it was all bullchit and she'll look like a stupid, selfish arsehole. If it wasn't a lie then you'll be relieved that you helped this troubled person. Either way, you come out smelling like roses, sleep better at night, and get this toxic woman out of your life, because you deserve that: Nobody deserves to be burdened with toxic people that ruin others' quality of life, and a toxic woman can destroy a man's mind, body and soul like a cancerous tumor never dreamed of.

Last I checked, we all have one life to live, and while not possible, every single one of us prefers to live it in peace and harmony. It sure helps to achieve that goal when some selfish person isn't making life a living hell 24-7.

TLDR: Call the doc and get away from that crazy lady baw.
Posted by tketaco
Sunnyside, Houston
Member since Jan 2010
19561 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:52 pm to
Go frick another girl. Don’t get in too deep with crazy bitches.

Leave her and give a bottle of Aspirin as a going away present.
Posted by DabbyDoo84
Member since Apr 2018
24 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:54 pm to
She is mentally ill and that is sad, but she is not your problem to solve. If she was your wife, that would be different but she is not. Cut all ties with her. If she kills herself, that is horrible but not your fault and never will be. Best of luck to you because this situation sucks!
Posted by Nephropidae
Brentwood
Member since Nov 2018
2387 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:55 pm to
There is no way I would put up with that. You need to move on bud.
Posted by DabbyDoo84
Member since Apr 2018
24 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 1:55 pm to
“Pound sand” is one of my favorite expressions and I am so glad to see somebody else use it
Posted by lsu1919
Member since May 2017
3244 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 2:24 pm to
I haven’t read 5 pages so don’t know what’s been said that’s actually serious, but I went through this myself. Had a girl that mental issues and I tried to help. All I got out of it was a lot of guilt. Then when I was ready to leave she said she’d kill herself if I did. So I stayed and things got even worse.

To anybody in this position you need to walk away. This person needs help you can’t provide. You need to do what is best for you, and if they harm themselves that is on them. They will either do that or not and it won’t have much to do with you either way.
Posted by ExtraGravy
Member since Nov 2018
794 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 2:29 pm to
(no message)
This post was edited on 11/30/20 at 9:39 pm
Posted by Jcorye1
Tom Brady = GoAT
Member since Dec 2007
71479 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 2:31 pm to
quote:

I left her the other day, and now she’s telling me “I hope you feel good when I kill myself”


Yes. This is not your fault. It seems like it is your responsibility now, but it isn't. It took me a long time, and a couple of years to figure that out. This is not your fault. It seems like it is your responsibility now, but it isn't. It took me a long time, and a couple of years of randomly checking obituaries every so often to figure that out. Don't go down my route of taking forever to open up again. Get help.
This post was edited on 9/21/19 at 2:32 pm
Posted by lsucoonass
shreveport and east texas
Member since Nov 2003
68481 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 2:48 pm to
Yep had that happen to me in my marriage

Then only for her to say I lied about that. People with personality disorders will do that
Posted by yellowfin
Coastal Bar
Member since May 2006
97694 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:01 pm to
That really sucks but I bet a girl like that fricked you like a porn star. You got her number?
Posted by LSUSkip
Central, LA
Member since Jul 2012
17604 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:12 pm to
quote:

was depressed for a number of years and suicide crossed my mind.



Went through a bout of that myself. There isn't a soul that knows me that will ever know. I made sure to not leave any signs of what was in my head in case I actually went through with it. If she says it, it probably won't happen, and even if it did, it wasn't your fault. You're not a mind reader or a therapist.
Posted by Scoop
RIP Scoop
Member since Sep 2005
44583 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:34 pm to
Been there.

Seriously, BEEN THERE.

You are not going to fix her by being a good guy and the longer you stay in the mix, the higher the price you will pay.

You didn’t make her the way she is and you sure as hell won’t change it.

It’s not your responsibility.

Cut and run or stay and pay.
This post was edited on 9/21/19 at 3:36 pm
Posted by LSUGrrrl
Frisco, TX
Member since Jul 2007
33186 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:39 pm to
Are you my brother?

Women and men both need to learn that you can’t fix people. You can support them while THEY take ownership and significant steps to improve but you can’t, and shouldn’t want to, fix them.

Relationships are supposed to be mutually beneficial for both people, when averaged over time. Sometimes you have to give 80% but sometimes you receive 80%. Rarely is a relationship 50-50 at a given time. However, it should ebb and flow back and forth fluidly.

Maybe ask yourself why you feel the need to fix someone.

“But she’s had a hard time.”
“I know why she acts this way.”
“She’s amazing when she’s not like this.”

None of this matters when one person isn’t willing or capable to equally give and take. She needs to work in herself and come see you when she’s able to have a healthy relationship because the only person who can fix her is her.

And she almost certainly doesn’t respect you for all the trying you do.
Posted by Pechon
unperson
Member since Oct 2011
7748 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:39 pm to
This woman I was seeing a year ago did this shite after we broke up. I was out of town on business so I called her mom and then the police.

ETA: I’m with Scoop as well. Psycho gonna psycho, better to cut and run than try to help. They have to be willing to help themselves first.
This post was edited on 9/21/19 at 3:41 pm
Posted by LSUGrrrl
Frisco, TX
Member since Jul 2007
33186 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:41 pm to
quote:

I left her the other day, and now she’s telling me “I hope you feel good when I kill myself”


Contact her family and the police. You can’t take ownership for her actions and threats. Backing away and notifying people who can help her is the most useful thing you can do.
Posted by Scoop
RIP Scoop
Member since Sep 2005
44583 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 3:43 pm to
The most dangerous thing in this world is a good looking crazy female that can pull herself together for short stretches of time long enough to get a guy in the web.
Posted by Nawlens Gator
louisiana
Member since Sep 2005
5836 posts
Posted on 9/21/19 at 4:30 pm to

You've let this wacko infect your mind. Forget her right now. What you need is distance! Lots and lots of distance from this wacko. If you hang around, you deserve all the agony headed your way.

Good luck!

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