re: How should I handle this situation figuring out my Dad used my birth money?

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You do realize you have a net liability to your dad in a likely range of 200k-500k. This is assuming he raised you.

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you don't owe your parents shite for what they decide to spend on you. Parents raising their children is THEIR obligation when they have you. Now its great that his father paid for college or some of it at least, but that doesn't create a debt to the child.

I try very hard to defend millennials, I say no, they are just misunderstood, they are not really entitled, etc. And then this post comes along.

It sounds like your dad never invested the money, just spent it when it was given to him.

My parents didn't pay for a lick of my college tuition or expenses while I was in college. They told me they would repay half my student loans, but that never happened.

When I was a kid, I won some essay contest from Schwegmann's and won a $1,000 "college scholarship" in the form of a savings bond. My parents held it for safekeeping. When I graduated high school, I asked them about it and they told me that they cashed it in several years prior when high school tuition was due and they were short.

I love my parents very much. They did not pay for my car, nor my insurance, nor any expenses or gas, nor anything at all once I went off to college.

I could not imagine asking them to make me whole on that savings bond.

Yet, your dad paid for a heck of a lot more than my parents did, and not only do you want to ask for the money back, but you want it back with an investment return?

I could never do that. Sorry. I get that it's "your" money and I get that he paid for a lot of stuff he did not have to pay for. So just consider that perhaps part of your car or part of your tuition, you actually paid for that with your money. Isn't that cool? You saved up your money and used it to pay for your education or part of your car.

Should your dad have done what he did? No. Is it worth losing a relationship over, because that's a distinct possibility here if you ask him for the money back, with growth.

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Parents stealing from their children, even if they paid for everything else, is a pretty good indication they are a horrible person. You will be better off without him.

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Is it actually stealing? I could agree with the theft angle if the Dad took the money and the kid was responsible for paying for his own way through school. But it seems like Dad covered this.

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Is it worth losing a relationship over, because that's a distinct possibility here if you ask him for the money back, with growth.

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anybody saying cut his dad out his life is a facking moron.

They make it out as if his dad is a POS bum who never did shite for him and stole money from his wallet at night on a regular basis PLUS physically abused him. laughable. I'll also be willing to bet half these clowns do not have kids or know the first thing about raising kids.

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And I would say that cutting a horrible perosn out of your life is a win.

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you're being a little over dramatic.

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but its worth thinking about.

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No, not really when you consider everything else

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you're being a little over dramatic.

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stealing from your kids is a pretty big indicator of being a horrible person.

Now, could we be missing information that mitigates the situation? Yes, there could be.

I would wager large sums of money that if this parent is taking the kids money, then they are likely doing other abusive things.

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but it also doesn't sound like he had a great example for a father.

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his dad was HORRIBLE!!!! didn't you read all the terrible things he did to him his whole life? or the lack of things he did for him?

Press charges! THROW HIM IN JAIL!

I didn't say he was a horrible father, but there's more to parenthood than providing things for your kids. Taking money that is intended for your kid without telling him/her shows a lack of character, IMO, and sets a bad example. Maybe this was his only flaw as a parent. Maybe it's just an indication of other character issues. The OP did say it didn't really surprise him his dad took the money, so I lean towards the latter.

Well said.

OP has had every advantage in life. Are we so certain the money was "stolen" or was it used to benefit the OP in some way that they neglected to mention?

I notice that OP is no where to be found and clarify the issues.

Well, your story certainly explains your position. I can respect that.

Each of my kids, who are significantly younger, each have a savings account. They put some of the big money they get from presents, etc in it. In addition, each paycheck, an amount is automatically put into the account.

From time to time, we make withdrawals from the account to spend the money 100 percent on them. For example, if we are going to Disney World, we will take money out and buy them a gift card for them to spend while on vacation. Or, if they decide they want to go to a week of summer camp (my wife is off in the summer so it's not required) then we will take the money from that account and pay for it.

My oldest one, we tell her, hey, this is coming from the money that was saved, but I'm not sure she understands it. My youngest one, she would not understand no matter how we explained it.

So, do you think we are stealing?