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Started By
Message
2
Posted on 5/31/22 at 12:52 pm to TigersSEC2010
quote:
He can't even put knobs on cabinets?
This was my thought.
Now, to OP, I would not lie to the guy or make up excuses. If it was me, I'd say, Dude, you're working up a pretty big tab, and besides, you have to start learning to do this stuff on your own (half laughing as I say it).
Some people are in the habit of using others to the point that they don't realize that it's bad. Assume that and put you foot down in a nice way.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:03 pm to TideSaint
quote:
Well, I get a text from him today letting me know he would be home at 4:30. Not a text asking for assistance, just when they would be home
That dude is punking you down. No doubt about it.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:11 pm to TigersSEC2010
quote:
He can't even put knobs on cabinets?
I pondered about this more and it’s more humiliating every time I think about it.
I’ve definitely had help from car guys, but I also went and bought the parts needed to work on my cars before he got there. Early in my marriage, my dad and FiL helped me with plumbing when I didn’t know much. But I also bought the equipment and have used it since.
It’s kinda like moving… once you’re past 35, stop buying pizza and beer for your friends to help move. Do it yourself or pay a professional.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:18 pm to DownshiftAndFloorIt
quote:
Sounds like the guy is a plug to me
Or way smarter than the OP
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:29 pm to TideSaint
quote:
installed ceiling fans and light fixtures,
Are you a licensed electrician? Insured and bonded? No? well then you are opening yourself up to liability issues if something goes wrong with his light fixture or ceiling fan.
I know its an easy job and you're trying to be nice, but nice wont keep your name off the lawsuit. I'm an aircraft mechanic...pretty handy with tools and electricity and stuff, but I wont go do electrical work for anyone, for fear of litigation.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:43 pm to TideSaint
Does neighbor have skills/connections you can benefit from?
Bartering skills/assets is honorable and reasonable
Congrats. Could this be why the relationship has become untenable?
Bartering skills/assets is honorable and reasonable
quote:
His wife is pregnant
Congrats. Could this be why the relationship has become untenable?
Posted on 5/31/22 at 2:59 pm to TideSaint
quote:
I get a text from him today letting me know he would be home at 4:30.
Next time, be waiting at his house for him to get home while drinking his beer and sniffing on his wife's panties.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 3:32 pm to TideSaint
Send him a bill for services rendered.
Oh
quote:
How do I politely tell them my days of their free handyman are over without ruining the friendship?
Oh
Posted on 5/31/22 at 3:36 pm to TideSaint
Tell him to watch a youtube video of whatever he is incapable of doing.
I have done numerous things from watching a youtube video.
I have done numerous things from watching a youtube video.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 3:49 pm to TideSaint
Ask your wife to loan you your spine she has in her purse. Then march over to the next door neighbor and tell him in plain language that the free work is over.
I truly don't understand how people let themselves be taken advantage of over and over again. And it's not like I've never helped people out, because I have, and I do, but I will not let it be taken for granted that my services are available every time something is needing to be done.
I truly don't understand how people let themselves be taken advantage of over and over again. And it's not like I've never helped people out, because I have, and I do, but I will not let it be taken for granted that my services are available every time something is needing to be done.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 4:00 pm to gumbo2176
quote:OP is probably a people-pleaser and the neighbor is more than happy to continue to abuse that trait.
I truly don't understand how people let themselves be taken advantage of over and over again.
I think it's evidenced by the title of this thread - "How to politely tell a neighbor you're done helping them".
You just say it. You don't need a gameplan from a bunch of internet strangers. There's no secret recipe. You just say "no".
Posted on 5/31/22 at 5:08 pm to TideSaint
(no message)
Posted on 5/31/22 at 6:16 pm to TideSaint
One of the things I’ve learned in 70 yrs is that you get criticized and hated more when you help someone who needs help repeatedly and then you stop than you get from the same person if you never helped them at all. South LA is the exception. But it’s usually a few requests for help here and weather or oilfield related and it’s returned. Not a continuing need for help.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 6:31 pm to Royalfisher
Help someone once, and it's a favor. Help them twice, and they think it's your job for life.
Posted on 5/31/22 at 7:06 pm to Bayou
Correct answer.
Or present him with an outrageous bill next time and tell him you can’t do anything else till he pays up.
Or present him with an outrageous bill next time and tell him you can’t do anything else till he pays up.
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