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re: Christmas step parenting Q... am i wrong?

Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:54 pm to
Posted by wasteland
City of peace
Member since Apr 2011
5607 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:54 pm to
quote:

If you can’t watch children be excited on Christmas morning with their dad, then I’d suggest you stop dating women with children.


This
Posted by Mo Jeaux
Member since Aug 2008
59321 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:54 pm to
quote:

Dating her for 1.5yrs and referring to himself as a 'step parent" even though they aren't married


That's not what I was asking.
Posted by HoustonsTiger
Houston
Member since Feb 2007
388 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:54 pm to
quote:

see what I'm getting at here.


I do, but that is what led to my post.

I sacrifice alot - as I think any step parent does. But at the same time, was it really THAT out of line to rather spend my morning in a different way?
Posted by Vastmind
B Ara
Member since Sep 2013
4992 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:55 pm to
You must have a small pecker
Posted by Displaced
Member since Dec 2011
32732 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:55 pm to
quote:

as I think any step parent does

You aren't a step parent... You're just banging their mom.
Posted by Dawgholio
Bugtussle
Member since Oct 2015
13047 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:55 pm to
By now you should’ve already been in them drawers so why you still hanging around?
Posted by TopFlightSecurity
Watertown, NY
Member since Dec 2018
1318 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:55 pm to
Why in the hell would you date someone with two kids? Insane.
Posted by HoustonsTiger
Houston
Member since Feb 2007
388 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:56 pm to
quote:

You aren't a step parent.


OK - for those hung up on 'step parent' does it change things we are engaged and moving in together?
Posted by lsucoonass
shreveport and east texas
Member since Nov 2003
68516 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:57 pm to
Yeah

You were in the wrong
Posted by scott8811
Ratchet City, LA
Member since Oct 2014
11451 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:57 pm to
Ok...yea. But in this post the guy is basically asking if he was wrong for not wanting to watch a video that clearly made his SO happy and wanted to share with him. If she wanted to spend hours watching home movies of these kids I would totally be on this guys side in saying...hey I really don't wanna spend my Christmas this way. But I really don't see how it would have ruined his day to spend 5-10 minutes sharing in his SO's happiness watching her kids enjoy the day. The same way I really don't want to spend anytime on the phone with my mother-in-law, but it makes my wife happy.... it's only a few minutes and it's not going to ruin my whole damn day to do it.
Posted by Tyga Woods
South Central Jupiter Island, FL
Member since Sep 2016
30484 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:57 pm to
quote:

You must have a small pecker



Probably. But I keep it clean and smelling real good
Posted by momentoftruth87
Member since Oct 2013
72507 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:57 pm to
You're not wrong. Women will talk shite about their exs, but had enough good times to have kids with them.

She should be thankful that you want to be a part of her kids lives.

Tell her that it was only meant to suggest that you don't want to see the guy that wasn't good enough, but happy the kids are doing well. And id tell her that if she didn't like that, she could always try to find better - which is probably not going to happen. I don't know you, but you obv have to be better than her kids father. If she isn't thankful, you find better.
Posted by Mo Jeaux
Member since Aug 2008
59321 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:57 pm to
quote:

Why in the hell would you date someone with two kids? Insane.


Agreed. And it's two young kids. We're not talking about two 60-somethings with grown children in the picture. This is a (apparently) young guy with his own resources who is voluntarily tying himself down to someone looking to exploit someone else's resources to raise her two kids. Unbelievable.
Posted by Displaced
Member since Dec 2011
32732 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:58 pm to
quote:

for those hung up on 'step parent' does it change things we are engaged and moving in together?


If you are this adverse to seeing them enjoy their Christmas morning, no...
Posted by BayouENGR
Seagrove Beach
Member since Nov 2015
2381 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:58 pm to
quote:

Why is it an issue that I don't want to spend my morning watching these videos and enjoy my Christmas? 


Because while she was happy that her kids were having a good time, she was probably missing them. She was looking for some love and support from you. You failed.

Trust me, we have a blended family and Christmas is either the worst or the best, depending on where kids are.
Posted by Jon Ham
Member since Jun 2011
28652 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:58 pm to
Pull up the Facebook page of the last girl you were with and ask your SO to look through her photos with you, saying things like “doesn’t she look happy?!”
Posted by HoustonsTiger
Houston
Member since Feb 2007
388 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:59 pm to
quote:

ruined his day to spend 5-10 minutes sharing in his SO's happiness watching her kids enjoy the day


You are right. It wouldn't have ruined my day and I could have done just that. I just didn't think it would be an issue and my point was valid.

However, with the input of the OT apparently I'm incorrect, have a lot to learn about a step parent role, and should be wiser on picking my battles (although I didn't see it as a battle)
Posted by Mo Jeaux
Member since Aug 2008
59321 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:59 pm to
quote:

Ok...yea. But in this post the guy is basically asking if he was wrong for not wanting to watch a video that clearly made his SO happy and wanted to share with him. If she wanted to spend hours watching home movies of these kids I would totally be on this guys side in saying...hey I really don't wanna spend my Christmas this way. But I really don't see how it would have ruined his day to spend 5-10 minutes sharing in his SO's happiness watching her kids enjoy the day. The same way I really don't want to spend anytime on the phone with my mother-in-law, but it makes my wife happy.... it's only a few minutes and it's not going to ruin my whole damn day to do it.


I hear you, and I don't disagree per se. I just can't focus on his splinter and sore finger because he also has a gashing head wound that's bleeding profusely.
Posted by fr33manator
Baton Rouge
Member since Oct 2010
124814 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 12:59 pm to
quote:

Pull up the Facebook page of the last girl you were with and ask your SO to look through her photos with you, saying things like “doesn’t she look happy?!”


Well she should be, since she isn’t with him .
Posted by Jj283
Houma
Member since May 2015
798 posts
Posted on 12/26/18 at 1:00 pm to
What would have been more painless? Watching a few 1-minute video clips and saying “aww how great”- or the path you took?

You would have been done in 3 minutes. Now you’ll be hearing about it for three weeks.

And you were being a dick by the way.
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