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Started By
Message
re: Let's say your wife wants to quit after 1 child
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:21 pm to GRTiger
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:21 pm to GRTiger
quote:
Say I really loved a woman, but she said not wanting kids was a deal breaker. I tell her that I'd have kids with her and then tell her I changed my mind after we were married. If she divorces me, who is the a-hole?
You should divorce her...because clearly you don't love who she is.
I have friends who went through this exactly...for him it was a second marriage and all that woman wanted was to have one kid with him.
Didn't happen and it led to a whole bunch of bad shite prior to them finally divorcing.
Life is not a constant.
shite changes...if you can't adjust to it changing with the partner you have chosen then you need to move on to the next one.
1
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:23 pm to The Third Leg
quote:
That doesn't give them the power to force you to change.
Nope.
All you can do is be honest.
You tell someone the truth of how you feel.
After that what happens is up to them.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:23 pm to SlowFlowPro
So she should be forced to go through another 9 months of hell to make him happy? Women don't fully understand how bad pregnancy can be until they actually go through it. She went thru it,produced a child and decided she did not want to go thru such an experience ever again. Your response as the husband is "too fricking bad! Produce me an heir or else!!" frick off.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:26 pm to UFownstSECsince1950
That sucks. Kids are awesome.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:28 pm to iluvdatiger
quote:
So she should be forced to go through another 9 months of hell to make him happy? W
no
but i don't think it's wrong or immoral of him to consider divorce in the scenario, either
he entered into the agreement expecting to have more kids. should he be forced to go without?
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:28 pm to MountainTiger
quote:
I don't think we're in any danger of going extinct right at the moment.
bruh, do you even Ebola?
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:29 pm to asurob1
quote:
shite changes...if you can't adjust to it changing with the partner you have chosen then you need to move on to the next one.
Or perhaps A) grow up, or B) choose the "next one" more wisely......
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:29 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
but i don't think it's wrong or immoral of him to consider divorce in the scenario, either
he entered into the agreement expecting to have more kids. should he be forced to go without?
now the one he has would be punished for the decisions made
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:30 pm to 777Tiger
quote:
that's good, I'm not trying to be condescending, just amazes me that the default setting in most relationships seems to be appeasing the woman, innate desire to put the pussy on the pedestal maybe? who knows
Society has made it pretty clear that a man has no right to make a decision regarding children, and an attempt to go against the wishes of the woman makes the man an a-hole.
You want the woman to abort but she wants it? You are an a-hole
You want her to have the kid but she doesn? a-hole
You told your wife you would have children and now you're saying you don't want them? a-hole
You and your wife agreed to have kids but now she doesn't want them and you are upset? a-hole
You don't want to pay child support? a-hole
You want to be a part of the child's life, but the mother doesn't want you to? a-hole
This thread highlights one of the more ridiculous cases. God forbid a man feels anything but absolute gratitude that his wife decides on her, after stating otherwise before marriage, how many kids they will have together.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:30 pm to SlowFlowPro
You are right, he should just abandon her and the child she gave him so he can keep trying for heirs to his imaginary throne.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:31 pm to iluvdatiger
quote:
he should just abandon her and the child she gave him
that's a bit dramatic
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:35 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
but i don't think it's wrong or immoral of him to consider divorce in the scenario, either
My wife would have to bring home ex-convicts who wanted to hurt my kids for me to consider divorce. The effects of divorce on kids are so severe it would take something extreme for me to consider it.
I would try everything in my power to change her mind.
Marriage is a partnership. Some women will say we're selfish because we don't go through child birth. It goes both ways. They are selfish for determining the size of the family unilaterally and without compromise.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:35 pm to iluvdatiger
quote:
he should just abandon her and the child she gave him
You mean the child they created TOGETHER.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:36 pm to UFownstSECsince1950
Lots of people say one child that's it, no more, I'm done, finished etc.
Give it a bit. She'll want another/more.
Give it a bit. She'll want another/more.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:37 pm to pwejr88
women love babies. i believe it's due to oxytocin
so when the baby grows up and they lose that drug, they want more babies
so when the baby grows up and they lose that drug, they want more babies
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:41 pm to GRTiger
quote:
Posted by Message
GRTiger
Curious - are you married? For how long? Happily?
So living with another human being for the rest of your fricking life takes some serious compromises on both sides. And some changes of position/opinion as folks grow up. It still amazes me that some don't appreciate this......
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:44 pm to jpbTiger
Yes, I'm married. What makes you question my happiness? I'm not speaking personally, but more generally. And the entire point of my last post was that society is trying hard to make compromise when it comes to children unacceptable. So I agree, compromise should be a part of it, but posts in this thread make it apparent that not everyone agrees.
Maybe be a little more specific in your concerns. You are most definitely not comprehending what I am saying.
Maybe be a little more specific in your concerns. You are most definitely not comprehending what I am saying.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:44 pm to SabiDojo
You mean the child that apparently isn't good enough for him?
Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:46 pm to iluvdatiger
That's a reach.Posted on 10/22/14 at 4:47 pm to iluvdatiger
quote:
You mean the child that apparently isn't good enough for him?
whoa
again
a bit dramatic?
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