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Grantland Exclusive: Redacted NBA Scouting Reports
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:30 pm
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:30 pm
LINK
Here are a few of these incredibly hilarious transcripts. Click the link and read all of them though.
Here are a few of these incredibly hilarious transcripts. Click the link and read all of them though.
quote:
2013-14 Former Bobcats Staff
Michael would come down and sit at the end of the bench and make different bets with players. Like he bet Jannero Pargo that he would never start a game or average five points and Pargo had to do landscaping at Jordan’s house for like two months in order to pay him back.
quote:
2006-2014 Former Lakers Staff Member
Everything with him is Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe Kobe. I may have forgotten a few Kobes, but you get the picture. Hardest working player I’ve ever been around and it isn’t particularly close but the guy is like a basketball sociopath. Doesn’t know any of his teammates names. Called Pau “Paul” even after they won their first title together. Called Lamar “Larry.” He knew Fisher’s name. Thing is he called every point guard “Fish.” He calls Steve Nash “Fish.” He used to make Smush get dressed and taped in the broom closet. When I asked him why he said, “So Fish can get used to being around the things he’ll use when he becomes a janitor next year.” He was right about that one though. Once, Kobe got Vanessa this diamond ring because he thought she might divorce him. Smush was said something to the effect of that ring is bigger than my condo and Kobe yelled, “Fish, get back in your closet!” That was funny. That was the night he scored 81, so we were on the road.
quote:
2013-14 Former Pistons Staff Member
We used to beg Josh not to shoot threes. Literally, guys would offer him cash not to shoot. Everyone but Drummond, who couldn’t say shite because of his free throws. Josh took over three attempts a game at 26 percent! Brandon was pissed all those misses were messing up his stats. Chauncey would beg him not shoot threes but Josh wouldn’t listen and I think that’s partially how Chauncey knew it was finally time to retire besides him being done three years ago.
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:38 pm to Vicks Kennel Club
Funny. I particularly liked the one about James Harden:
quote:
As for his defense, he told me that sometimes he just gets to thinking about things, like Game of Thrones theories
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:44 pm to Projectpat
I think Kobe being a sociopath is one of the worst kept secrets in the world.
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:49 pm to Vicks Kennel Club
quote:
He used to make Smush get dressed and taped in the broom closet. When I asked him why he said, “So Fish can get used to being around the things he’ll use when he becomes a janitor next year.”
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:53 pm to Vicks Kennel Club
That Smush Parker deal had to be some sort of test, right? One that Smush obviously failed miserably.
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:53 pm to Vicks Kennel Club
quote:
2011-2014 Former Knicks Player
Melo is a great, great scorer. I would put him in the tier of guys right below the very best in the game. Absolutely a player worth going after but no way he leaves New York’s money on the table. He runs that team. He engineered my trade to Dallas, I know that for sure. There were some statements made in the media by an anonymous player regarding dudes who are with CAA and how they get better treatment because the agency, especially at that time, ran the team basically. Anyway, Melo blamed me and I got traded. Which is fine. I was the only guy trying to protect the paint anyway but Woodson had us switching all over the place. It sucks that I still have to play with Felton.
I bet Tyson Chandler and Raymond Felton are gonna be besties in Dallas this year.
This post was edited on 9/17/14 at 1:54 pm
Posted on 9/17/14 at 1:55 pm to Jwho77
Yeah, the line about Felton cracked me up. Almost included that one for that line alone.
Posted on 9/17/14 at 2:03 pm to Vicks Kennel Club
Umm....these are fake...
Posted on 9/17/14 at 3:41 pm to wallowinit
quote:
Umm....these are fake...
Well I hoped everyone realized that
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