Booty calls gone wrong: dos and don'ts

I used to have booty call relationship with a girl two classes behind me while at Ole Miss. She was a Freshman and I was a Junior. I learned the art of booty call from 6th year Senior who owned the record for the most abused booty call relationship in the history of Ole Miss. That guy had a girl that he could booty call anytime of the night or day. I meet a girl that seemed the fit the mold and what do you know, I hit pay dirt.

I learned a thing or two about the booty call and I thought I would share with those wanting to get in the game.

1) Booty calls are not relationships. You need to both be aware of this. So don't unload on your fuk buddy, that is not what this is about.

2) Booty calls typically work best when done before 3 AM and not totally wasted. My friend broke this rule and so did I but if you're new at this keep it closer to 1am or sooner.

3) Booty calls need to remember to use hygiene. Don't forget to bath every now and then, butt odor and stank will end the booty call privileges.

4) Do not blow your booty call buddy's cover when they are out on a date. This is tempting when you are striking out will other options but it will only create bad blood and is definitely a good way to end the booty call privileges for sure.

5) Make sure your booty call buddy gets off. This is about mutual gratification. Your SO may believe that sex ends when you get through but a booty call will want to try to get theirs too. Easy solution for the guys, just make sure she gets hers before you get yours.

Happy calling!