An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like" | TigerDroppings.com

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EZE Tiger Fan
Member since Jul 2004
24059 posts

An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"



For the ignorant white trash rednecks, TL:DR.

Now that this is out of the way:

I firmly believe (wrongly, of course) that I finally have a grasp on what Miles needs to do in order to satify those who are not happy with him as OUR coach. Yes, Miles isn't perfect, but who is? Oh yes, that's right, according to many here, Saban is! Good, that gives us something to work with. So, in order for Miles to be more like Saban, and become the "perfect" head coach, I am compiling a list of things he needs to do.

Any and all help will be appreciated. Since a lot of Saban penis envy is directed toward the day he became the coach at Bama in 2007, I've decided to break it down by year and compare overall seasons and head to head combats during those seasons. You have to keep in mind that for Miles to be like Saban, we have to forget a lot of the frick ups Saban had at LSU.

You all have no idea how exited I am to piss off many of you here. I love the fact that so many of you are miserable. I hope I can enrage a few of you.

2007: Saban takes over the Bama program, and promptly loses to ULM. Saban also loses to Miles. I give Saban a pass here bc he had a competitive game with Miles despite it being his first year, and one of Miles' best teams. You will see this "very close game" theme play out a lot, just a warning.

So, for Miles to be perfect like Saban, he needs to lose a game to terrible team....and soon. Saban also lost to UAB while at LSU. Miles has yet to do this. So, let's make this his #1 priority today. It will be listed below.

2008: Saban wins the SEC, but can't win the BCS bowl game against....UTAH. Not to mention Saban's SEC Championship team STRUGGLED to beat LSU this year as well. LSU, with a struggling freshman QB, took Bama to OT and lost by 3. Bama needed LSU's QB to throw FOUR picks to seal the game, including a pick 6.

ETA: My fault. I'm so blinded with Saban's awesomeness, I forgot he DID NOT WIN the SEC that year either, and made a BCS Bowl, but now he has a problem with UF doing it.

I'll make this a second priority on the list below:

2009: Clearly Saban's greatest accomplishment as a coach in terms of a complete season. However, as an LSU fan, who can forget that idiot Les Miles had his team with a LEAD in the fourth quarter with the second string QB, RB and several defenders in the game. Bama takes the lead while LSU's best defender is sidelined with cramps. Despite the struggles, LSU is still in the game when the SEC steps in to assure a Bama victory. Point? This is the lone season LSU fans should envy, and Bama needed two close wins AT HOME to seal the deal on this season. Two close wins? OMFG. Miles haters would never stand for that.

2010 - Saban loses 3 games, Miles loses 2, AU buys a title. Saban loses to Miles as well, but this won't count with Miles haters. Saban, however, blows a 21 point lead to AU...AT HOME. Miles needs to do this.

2011 - Oh this is a fun one, and one Miles will NEVER be able to achieve. Why? Simple, LSU is a Tier 2 program in the eyes of the network that owns the sport. So, I'll keep it simple: See #5 on the list.

2012: Work in conjunction with your pals in the SEC to work up a nice, weak schedule for you. Play only 2 ranked teams all year, and LOSE AT HOME again. Thanks to your weak conference schedule, you make the SECCG and now, due to other teams losing (see 2003, 2011 and 2012) you have a shot at another title. Wow, the man is brilliant. How does he do it?

2013: See 2012 because I bet this happens again due to the third year in a row of having a very weak conference schedule.

I have others I'll add to the list later when I'm bored again. These will revolve around topics like recruiting, grey shirting, and Branding. You'll hate me even more and I can't wait!

Bash away, idiots!

HOW LES MILES CAN BE PERFECT LIKE NICK SABAN:

1) Lose to a terrible team you shouldn't lose to.

2) Win the SEC while struggling to beat lower tier teams from the division, then lose to a Mountain West Team in the BCS bowl game.

3) Have a season like 2009 (I will move this to #1 soon, because it is relevant)....but with NO CLOSE GAMES!! Great coaches shouldn't struggle with terrible teams like Tenn and LSU were in 2009, especially at home (notice a theme here too?)

4) Blow a 3TD lead, AT HOME, to your biggest rival.

5) Play a historically weak schedule (in terms of BCS game participants), lose your biggest game at home, go on the four-letter network and BEG for a second chance, ride the coattails of your divisional rival into the game even though you couldn't win your own division/conference....Profit!

6) See #5, but this time, actually WIN the SEC, even though you lost again AT HOME, to a top team in your division. Whew, thank you SEC for having us avoid USC, UGA and UF during the season...AGAIN!

7) Anyone noticing a pattern of God-Like Saban teams struggling/LOSING annual home games, but yet coming out smelling like a rose? I would think some "luck" has to be involved there, right? Wait, only Miles is lucky. Losing at home is all part of Saban's plan because the man is a GENIUS!

8) Treat other members of your AD like shite.

9) Learn to put his immediate family last in his list of priorities.

10) Show the world how much of a hypocrite you can be by discussing the standards other teams should meet for playing in a BCS bowl, while your program was granted the same leeway not once but TWICE, including a free trip to the Championship game despite finishing THIRD in your conference.



This post was edited on 11/29 at 1:33 pm



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Choctaw
Navy Fan
Pumpin' Sunshine
Member since Jul 2007
51573 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


Be a huge dickhead to anyone that works in the athletic department.





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LSU GrandDad
LSU Fan
houston, texas
Member since Jun 2009
12092 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


i don't want miles to become more saban like. i want him to improve his team to win the sec and or nc soon, hopefully next year. i think saban is a dick.





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theunknownknight
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2005
28053 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


TL;DR





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LSUDonMCO
LSU Fan
Orlando
Member since Dec 2003
2230 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


Consistently lie to everyone about your true plans.

Bully the media






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treble hook
Member since Nov 2011
2310 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

i want him to improve his team to win the sec and or nc soon, hopefully next year


This. But I don't see it happening.

quote:

saban is a dick.


No doubt about.






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TheDoc
LSU Fan
doc is no more
Member since Dec 2005
99297 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

blows a 21 point lead to AU...AT HOME. Miles needs to do this


Tennessee 2005 ring a bell?






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EZE Tiger Fan
Member since Jul 2004
24059 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

Be a huge dickhead to anyone that works in the athletic department


This is a great one. I may or may not have dealt with it directly. LOL.

I will add it to the list shortly!! Nice.






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756
LSU Fan
Member since Sep 2004
9750 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"




Put me down as one who never wants to see Saban again at LSU-

Also add that CLM would have to become a egotistical self centered, self promoting -- awww you can finish it






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TheDoc
LSU Fan
doc is no more
Member since Dec 2005
99297 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


2 BCS championships > 1 BCS championship

And saban is on the path for #3

In 4 years

Just saying man






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LeonPhelps
LSU Fan
Member since May 2008
4621 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


Complete a coherent sentence.





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LeonPhelps
LSU Fan
Member since May 2008
4621 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

2 BCS championships > 1 BCS championship

And saban is on the path for #3

In 4 years

Just saying man


Saban has 3 BCS championships, which is light years better than 1 BCS championship. And in about a month he will have 4 BCS championships.






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JaxTigah
Georgia Fan
Jackson, MS
Member since Dec 2009
1488 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"



Actually, he did not win the SEC in '08. He won the west, UF won the title.






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tadelatt
LSU Fan
Buga Nation
Member since Jan 2010
9165 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

5) Play a historically weak schedule (in terms of BCS game participants), lose your biggest game at home, go on the four-letter network and BEG for a second chance, ride the coattails of your divisional rival into the game even though you couldn't win your own division/conference....Profit!


The only problem I have with this is that he beat us.

Other than that, ha.

I love Les Miles, fwiw. Have since 2005






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GhostBuster6
Alabama Fan
Nashville
Member since Jun 2012
1809 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

LSU is still in the game when the SEC steps in to assure a Bama victory.






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junkfunky
LSU Fan
Member since Jan 2011
14176 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


Vertebral compressions.





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Jet12
LSU Fan
Member since Nov 2010
19484 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


Develop anger issues and high blood pressure.





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LSUnKaty
LSU Fan
Katy, TX
Member since Dec 2008
3705 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

2008: Saban wins the SEC
No he didn't. Florida beat him in the SECCG, then he finished out the year with a loss to Utah by 14.

So the only thing Miles did wrong last year was win the SECCG against Georgia and end up 13-1 instead of 12-2 like Saban's 2008 Bama team.



This post was edited on 11/29 at 11:56 am


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YouAre8Up
LSU Fan
New Orleans, La.
Member since Mar 2011
1429 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


May not like the guy but he wins, a lot.

Has a .835 winning pct. at Bama and has a chance at his 4th BCS title.

A dick he may be but at 5.3 million a year he does what he is paid to do, his job. He is not there to be friends with everyone. He is there to win titles and that is exactly what he is doing.






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TDTGodfather
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Dec 2007
5699 posts

re: An Updated List Of Things Miles Needs To Do To Become More "Saban Like"


quote:

blows a 21 point lead to AU...AT HOME. Miles needs to do this


quote:

Tennessee 2005 ring a bell?


which of those two games were more important to their respective seasons.

bonus question: name the the country's biggest natural disaster that preceded the iron bowl that year?






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