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WWYD- On my way to a day long work meeting

Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:29 am
Posted by JB Mac
Heart of Dixie
Member since Jan 2017
141 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:29 am
Mandatory yearly kickoff meeting

Last night ate some week old deli meat that didn't smell too great and woke up at 4 with the shits. I think I've got that part under control, but I have the worst gas as my stomach is making awful sounds.

The worst part is it's not the small to mid level gas that I can get by with by pushing them slowly through the chair, it's a god awful toxic smell that makes the paint peel off.


Our meeting is from 8-5 and I'll be sitting next to high level employees all day with this unbearable gas and smell.

How do I survive this?
Posted by lsugrad35
Jambalaya capital of the world
Member since Feb 2007
3181 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:31 am to
Own it.
Posted by CHEDBALLZ
South Central LA
Member since Dec 2009
21922 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:31 am to
4 gas-x and 3 immodiums
Posted by Supermoto Tiger
Baton Rouge
Member since Dec 2010
9927 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:34 am to
Let a few slip out in the room before anyone gets there.
Posted by Displaced
Member since Dec 2011
32711 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:39 am to
Get a stronger stomach and/or stop lying. Deli meat doesn't go bad in a week.
Posted by JB Mac
Heart of Dixie
Member since Jan 2017
141 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:42 am to
It was either the deli meat or almond milk I had later in the night.

My kid left the deli meat zipper thing open. I normally eat it after a week with no problem.

The almond milk was about 2-3 weeks old after being opened.


I don't give a crap what caused it, it doesn't help my current situation. Lol
Posted by ruzil
Baton Rouge
Member since Feb 2012
16904 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:45 am to
quote:

4 gas-x and 3 immodiums


Good advice, but I would add:

Crush the pills and snort them as they will start working almost immediately. Sounds like you need fast action.
Posted by tgrbaitn08
Member since Dec 2007
146214 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:47 am to
2 Imodium and lots of water
Posted by Bullfrog
Institutionalized but Unevaluated
Member since Jul 2010
56240 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:47 am to
You've got to play it up. Explain your situation to prepare those you are sitting around so they know what's up when you ask them to pull your finger.
Posted by NikeShox
Toula Baw
Member since Sep 2016
1251 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:48 am to
Be careful with them farts baw
Posted by Kcrad
Diamondhead
Member since Nov 2010
54877 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:49 am to
Eat an onion and some cottage cheese. You can thank me later.
Posted by Backinthe615
Member since Nov 2011
6871 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:53 am to
No matter what happens, maintain eye contact. Assert dominance.
Posted by CorkSoaker
Member since Oct 2008
9784 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:53 am to
Let em rip. Have fun with it. YOLO
Posted by Screaming Viking
Member since Jul 2013
4450 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:58 am to
Immortal words from Bucket List:

-never pass a bathroom
-never waste a hard on
-never trust a fart

words to live by.
Posted by JB Mac
Heart of Dixie
Member since Jan 2017
141 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 7:58 am to
Anyone ever tried those odor proof underwear with the charcoal?
Posted by 504Voodoo
New Orleans
Member since Aug 2012
13533 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 8:00 am to
quote:

Own it.



It's your only option
Posted by dcrews
Houston, TX
Member since Feb 2011
30189 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 8:08 am to
shite yourself on purpose so you have a legitimate excuse to leave the meeting.
Posted by lsugrad35
Jambalaya capital of the world
Member since Feb 2007
3181 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 8:09 am to
quote:

It's your only option


Exactly. This baw would rather wear some damn charcoal drawz
Posted by CHEDBALLZ
South Central LA
Member since Dec 2009
21922 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 8:12 am to
quote:

Crush the pills and snort them


Pro tip right there!
Posted by cleeveclever
Baton Rouge
Member since Aug 2008
2046 posts
Posted on 1/10/17 at 8:13 am to
(no message)
This post was edited on 7/1/20 at 12:49 am
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