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re: What some things not to say at a funeral?

Posted on 12/27/19 at 10:48 pm to
Posted by Cracker
in a box
Member since Nov 2009
17777 posts
Posted on 12/27/19 at 10:48 pm to
“So I am balls deep in the deceased’s old lady’s arse and he walks in”
Posted by Bawcephus
Member since Jul 2018
2747 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 12:45 am to
I wonder who's next?

Took long enough!

Who dressed them in that?!

Do we have to stay for the rosary?

Why's everyone so sad? It's bumming me out.

No booze? What a shitty party.

Posted by LeMarteau
Hoover, AL (B.R. native)
Member since Mar 2008
2168 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 12:53 am to
You know these come in threes.

Was an autopsy performed?
Posted by Eightballjacket
Member since Jan 2016
7322 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 1:25 am to
Sorry about your mom. When you have a moment, could you help me with this parking ticket?
Posted by Scott Slutzker
Member since May 2015
57 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 1:31 am to
If there’s anything I can do, let me know.

ETA: My thoughts and prayers. Basically says I’m just here because.
This post was edited on 12/28/19 at 1:33 am
Posted by Bullfrog
Institutionalized but Unevaluated
Member since Jul 2010
56462 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 2:30 am to
What are y’all doing with his truck?
Lemme know.
Posted by Sugarbuggies
North Louisiana
Member since Dec 2011
240 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 10:04 pm to
You're next.
Posted by USMEagles
Member since Jan 2018
11811 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 11:01 pm to
I sell an essential oil that will really help you through the grieving process.
Posted by CoachDon
Louisville
Member since Sep 2014
12409 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 11:16 pm to
You need to make peace with them being gone, or you need to say good bye.

I know how you feel

Those are a few of the worst
Posted by soccerfüt
Location: A Series of Tubes
Member since May 2013
65958 posts
Posted on 12/28/19 at 11:21 pm to
(To the widow) “You look drop dead gorgeous.”

Posted by IT_Dawg
Georgia
Member since Oct 2012
21897 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 6:21 am to
Me: “How did you know her?”

Dad: “She’s my daughter”

Me: “You mean, she was, your daughter”
Posted by 62Tigerfan
Member since Sep 2015
4623 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 8:37 am to
The one thing I hear at EVERY (open casket) funeral is "he/she looks good". I'm thinking what do you mean he looks good. He's dead you idiot!

He's dead, Jim

Posted by Art_Vandelay
Member since Nov 2019
161 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 5:35 pm to
Welcome back to the dating pool
Posted by TigerstuckinMS
Member since Nov 2005
33687 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 5:40 pm to
Ladies, the guy in the casket ain't the only thing that's stiff in here.
Posted by fishfighter
RIP
Member since Apr 2008
40026 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 5:41 pm to
Got a far friend that passed away a few days ago. Well, he was married, had a daughter. Fast line after 10 years, he came out and was Gay. Don't know if I will go. His folks had passed away last year which were good friends.

Just wanted to know if it is ok to ask if he died of AIDs?
Posted by PhifeDogg
Stankonia
Member since Mar 2006
6049 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 5:41 pm to
Posted by cypresstiger
The South
Member since Aug 2008
10648 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 7:45 pm to
You’re next Grandma
Posted by yatesdog38
in your head rent free
Member since Sep 2013
12737 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 7:47 pm to
Hope he didn't miss any life insurance payments.
Posted by 6R12
Louisiana
Member since Feb 2005
8755 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 7:48 pm to
Being there is the best, saying very little is best.
Posted by Rock Floyd
Member since Dec 2019
517 posts
Posted on 12/29/19 at 7:50 pm to
I'm just here to make sure the SOB is really dead.

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