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re: The results are in, the OT never fails and is all knowing
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:07 am to Hammertime
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:07 am to Hammertime
you just need to put your foot down son. 1st lesson is to make them realize that you will walk out on that the same door you walked in on at the drop of a hat. Cray gonna cray, its just finding the amount that you can tolerate without going Ike Turner on that a$$.
0
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:15 am to ZacAttack
I'd also quit doing the chores around the house. She's a woman, and she should be doing them. If she doesn't like the way you do them, tell her to get off her fat arse and do them herself (like she's supposed to)
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:21 am to ZacAttack
She'll go back to extreme nagging in like a month.
She's found the perfect excuse now for when she nags(stress, hormones). She'll keep feeding that excuse to you since you'll just accept it.
Like someone else posted....there is a difference between your usual female nagging of their SO and what she said. I nag my husband to leave a clothes basket on the dryer for when he does laundry and forgets about it I can just throw in basket and place near his closet...I don't nag about the way he walks.
She's found the perfect excuse now for when she nags(stress, hormones). She'll keep feeding that excuse to you since you'll just accept it.
Like someone else posted....there is a difference between your usual female nagging of their SO and what she said. I nag my husband to leave a clothes basket on the dryer for when he does laundry and forgets about it I can just throw in basket and place near his closet...I don't nag about the way he walks.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:21 am to ZacAttack
She's going to cheat on you.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:24 am to Hammertime
quote:
I'd also quit doing the chores around the house. She's a woman, and she should be doing them. If she doesn't like the way you do them, tell her to get off her fat arse and do them herself (like she's supposed to)
This to some extent.. pick your battles. if she doesnt like the way you do it, tell her to do that $hit herself. Has to be a balance there but make d@mn sure she knows when its time to grab her ankles
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:41 am to SabiDojo
quote:
She's already cheated on you.
Fixed it far you.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:45 am to ZacAttack
Regardless, my advice still stands. Kill yourself before its too late...
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:48 am to ZacAttack
this is in response to her nagging?
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:50 am to LSUTygerFan
Dude started thread yesterday axing TD's opinion on what to do with nagging g/f.
Today's thread is how it turned out.
Today's thread is how it turned out.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 11:50 am to ZacAttack
quote:
Anyhow, come to find out there were some underlying issues as well. Stress, hormones etc. The OT truly is all knowing
Hate to break it to you, Sport, but this isn't the one time anomaly excuse she wants it to be. These things are the NORM with women. Is she mature enough to handle these emotions on a weekly or monthly basis without tying you to the whipping post?
Answer these questions w her before you marry.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:02 pm to Sao
I agree w everyone here. I sympathize w OP bc it is hard to find someone you are "into" enough for a relationship.
That being said, if you don't learn from a relationship you're doomed to repeat same mistakes. You handled it correctly, but it is likely too late. She is in full blown "checking out her options" mode and will likely move on when she finds another/better option.
That is, if she hasn't already.
My advice is to start looking for a new girl. Finding one before this one leaves will soften the blow. Women are masterful at this technique. That's why they are a complete disaster if they are broken up with when they don't want to.
All women have some crazy in them, but as a man it's your job to mitigate it and give them boundaries. It's not as if they consciously test the boundaries, they just do it and learn what's acceptable within the relationship.
It's your job as a man to figure out what you'll be willing to tolerate and lay down your boundaries as soon as they show up in the relationship. That way it works out better for the both of you early on as you can each see if you can tolerate the other's idiosyncrasies.
Learn from this one.
TLDR: start finding another girl now, establish crazy limit early in relationship, profit
That being said, if you don't learn from a relationship you're doomed to repeat same mistakes. You handled it correctly, but it is likely too late. She is in full blown "checking out her options" mode and will likely move on when she finds another/better option.
That is, if she hasn't already.
My advice is to start looking for a new girl. Finding one before this one leaves will soften the blow. Women are masterful at this technique. That's why they are a complete disaster if they are broken up with when they don't want to.
All women have some crazy in them, but as a man it's your job to mitigate it and give them boundaries. It's not as if they consciously test the boundaries, they just do it and learn what's acceptable within the relationship.
It's your job as a man to figure out what you'll be willing to tolerate and lay down your boundaries as soon as they show up in the relationship. That way it works out better for the both of you early on as you can each see if you can tolerate the other's idiosyncrasies.
Learn from this one.
TLDR: start finding another girl now, establish crazy limit early in relationship, profit
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:07 pm to Gris Gris
Gris, your advice to the OP is profoundly accurate. 
I walked a mile in those shoes over 20 yrs ago with a would-be Mrs. G..........and got the hell out.
One can only hope to make a minimal change in someone else's thought processes, viewpoints, and internal behaviors, which then manifest as their outward behaviors.
I walked a mile in those shoes over 20 yrs ago with a would-be Mrs. G..........and got the hell out.
One can only hope to make a minimal change in someone else's thought processes, viewpoints, and internal behaviors, which then manifest as their outward behaviors.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:15 pm to G Vice
Can someone link the original thread this one is based on? I haven't been on the OT in a while..
Preesh.
Preesh.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:15 pm to G Vice
When the women are saying this isn't right, the men should listen. All of this setting the boundaries and putting her in her place business is a bunch of BS that doesn't apply to this set of facts. Nagging isn't telling someone he walks funny, smells badly and is never happy. Those are her opinions of him and she didn't think twice about expressing it. These are things you can't take back. Once played, here to stay.
Nagging is a whole different ballgame which can be worked with between the two of them. What she said can't be. It's a done deal, Lucille. He's talking like she's taking it back, but that's the way she feels. I'd have been out the door or he'd have been, in short order, had someone said that to me. I have more respect for myself than that and I don't need anyone so badly that I'm willing to allow them to insult me personally in that manner. It's not like he's got kids with her or is even married to her. He's got a chance to find someone else.
Nagging is a whole different ballgame which can be worked with between the two of them. What she said can't be. It's a done deal, Lucille. He's talking like she's taking it back, but that's the way she feels. I'd have been out the door or he'd have been, in short order, had someone said that to me. I have more respect for myself than that and I don't need anyone so badly that I'm willing to allow them to insult me personally in that manner. It's not like he's got kids with her or is even married to her. He's got a chance to find someone else.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:16 pm to ZacAttack
Did you stop walking like a fig?
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:17 pm to CocomoLSU
Coco, click on the OP's name and look at his posts. You'll find the original thread.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:20 pm to CocomoLSU
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:20 pm to ZacAttack
Just keep your head on a swivel. There is a guy named Dirty Mike who looks like Max Headroom and wears a man thong who will bang your chick to the rhythm of Gwen Stefani singing hollaback girl, on a mini Yacht in front of his high rent playa friends cheering him on from the bow.
Damn! To late. I read the rest of the thread and see that he already did his "when the bow breaks" maneuver on your old lady.
Damn! To late. I read the rest of the thread and see that he already did his "when the bow breaks" maneuver on your old lady.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 12:38 pm to Gris Gris
Bingo on all of that.
The OP should be thankful that she's showing her true self at this stage. She practically opened the door for him to let himself free.
The constantly trying to work things out or to keep putting the foot down is tiresome, and tells you that there is incompatibility with core values.
The tough part is in the moving on. For me, we were living together for 2 yrs, and so it seemed more like a divorce, with enough pain to go around, as her family was great and very supportive of us. I didn't like doing that to them, but they also understood their daughter.
The OP should be thankful that she's showing her true self at this stage. She practically opened the door for him to let himself free.
The constantly trying to work things out or to keep putting the foot down is tiresome, and tells you that there is incompatibility with core values.
The tough part is in the moving on. For me, we were living together for 2 yrs, and so it seemed more like a divorce, with enough pain to go around, as her family was great and very supportive of us. I didn't like doing that to them, but they also understood their daughter.
Posted on 5/13/15 at 1:05 pm to G Vice
Oh,it can be hard to leave a relationship without a doubt, but it's harder to live in a bad relationship. That's like living in a jail. It doesn't make either party happy. If he's going to try to be happier, he should move on.
Relationships take a lot of work in the long term, but it's not the same type of work when it's just not meant to be.
Relationships take a lot of work in the long term, but it's not the same type of work when it's just not meant to be.
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