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re: Is The Word "Retarded" Offensive?
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:02 am to TheSexecutioner
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:02 am to TheSexecutioner
In the context of describing a person, yes.
Describing the progress of something (e.g. "The Wehrmacht's advance through the Ardennes in the Winter of 1944 was retarded by the dense forests and fierce Allied resistance around Elsenborne Ridge and Bastogne") shouldn't be, but knee-jerk reactions to it are rapidly pushing it to the land currently occupied by the n-word (among others).
Describing the progress of something (e.g. "The Wehrmacht's advance through the Ardennes in the Winter of 1944 was retarded by the dense forests and fierce Allied resistance around Elsenborne Ridge and Bastogne") shouldn't be, but knee-jerk reactions to it are rapidly pushing it to the land currently occupied by the n-word (among others).
This post was edited on 10/30/14 at 10:03 am
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Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:03 am to kage
Saying "that's gay" or "that's so gay" is the best these days! 
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:09 am to lsu480
The one word that I never even really thought of as offensive or demeaning sis the only one that has ever hurt my son. Some kid referred to him as "the handicapped boy" last year. The only time I use handicap is when I'm talking about the car tag.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:12 am to drunkenpunkin
I'm sorry your son has to deal with that but he is handicapped. Just make sure he knows that being handicapped is FINE and that anyone making fun of him is an a-hole...and being handicapped is better than being an a-hole.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:15 am to drunkenpunkin
quote:
The only time I use handicap is when I'm talking about the car tag.
I'm not PC. I am concerned about the constant pushback. I get "retarded" being offensive, purely because of context and how the word is commonly used. But, how long is disabled going to be okay? How long before we have to just say, "Different" without any specifics or accuracy to it?
Is this going to be another - n-word/colored/negro/Afro American/black/African American - progression (and I don't blame black folks for this - this is, mainly, liberal speech/thought police of all stripes moving the target - most black folks I've been around, my entire life, individually self-identify as black)?
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:17 am to drunkenpunkin
quote:
you ban one word that's offensive, and another crops up that means basically the same thing.
This, but the self appointed thought police are never going to rest.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:17 am to Ace Midnight
quote:
Is this going to be another - n-word/colored/negro/Afro American/black/African American - progression
It already is.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:19 am to TheSexecutioner
The PC police say it is. I was watching Tropic Thunder on tv and the phrase "full retard" was bleeped.
The hyped offense seems to be dying down, though.
The hyped offense seems to be dying down, though.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:19 am to lsu480
I know. That's the point. I never considered that an offensive or hurtful word. And I guarantee the kid who said it wasn't intending to be mean. It's a descriptor. Like "the boy with blonde hair." He was hurt and he will be again. The people you have to watch out for are not the assholes who blatantly make fun of the disabled. Everyone knows they're assholes. It's the people who don't realize they're being jerks. Like, when we go someplace and he's in his wheelchair full grown adults walk up to me and ask "what's wrong with him?" In front of him. That's a dick move. And they don't even realize they're demeaning him 1) by ignoring the fact that he's a person and can speak and hear and 2) by thinking that it's any of their business why he's in a wheelchair.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:20 am to lsu480
quote:
Just make sure he knows that being handicapped is FINE and that anyone making fun of him is an a-hole...and being handicapped is better than being an a-hole.
Cripples, Bastards and Broken things
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:21 am to Ace Midnight
quote:
m not PC. I am concerned about the constant pushback. I get "retarded" being offensive, purely because of context and how the word is commonly used. But, how long is disabled going to be okay? How long before we have to just say, "Different" without any specifics or accuracy to it?
There's your answer. Be specific. Instead of saying retarded, handicapped, or disabled say he has autism, or he has traumatic brain injury, or he has dyslexia. Give the disability specificity. It helps people to identify with my daughter better when they know she has autism then if I simply stated she was disabled or handicapped.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:23 am to drunkenpunkin
Maybe I'm off base, but to some extent what you are describing and maybe as an element of the larger issue is the disabled and disabled person's family coming to terms with the disability. Of course it also helps if people can be more sensitive too.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:24 am to drunkenpunkin
quote:
Like, when we go someplace and he's in his wheelchair full grown adults walk up to me and ask "what's wrong with him?" In front of him.
People just don't think. I treat everyone in an age appropriate manner, until it is obvious that is the inappropriate approach. Courtesy to someone with mobility issues should not trump common sense. If the kid is wearing a helmet and/or is obviously afflicted with Downs or other issue, I might lean towards dealing with the caretaker, in a discreet manner. Otherwise, they get the greeting of the day and appropriate courtesy/mobility assistance - just as I would offer any other human being.
Maybe it was just the way I was raised...
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:34 am to TheSexecutioner
I think we have the same friend. I saw her rant as well.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:38 am to Peazey
No you are absolutely correct in terms.of someone using words that might hurt his feelings. It's definitely a process of acceptance. He tells me all the time he's going to play football for the Saints. And I don't tell him he's not because one day he will realize that that will never be a possibility for him. But he has to come to realizations about his limitations in his own time and a lot of it will come through interactions as described above. However, not speaking to him or speaking as though he doesn't exist is beyond rude. It's way more offensive than people using a word I don't like so much. Bad attitudes are a million times worse than bad words.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:42 am to TheSexecutioner
You mean the "R" word..? The OT established the "R" word a long time ago was "Ravioli"...
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:48 am to Boss
That's helpful when you can give people a simple answer. Not saying autism is simple by any means, but it's one word that people know and generally have a basic understanding of. My son has autism, too, but that's not his main diagnosis or the reason he needs a wheelchair. When I say his primary diagnosis I then have to give a little lesson on what that is and why he has autism and needs his wheelchair, etc. Sometimes disabled is much easier.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:57 am to drunkenpunkin
Right, but taking the time to provide that mini-educational lesson goes a long way in helping people understand. Having worked with children with disabilities for years, many adults are uncomfortable because they simply do not know.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 10:59 am to Boss
I know. I also know sometimes I want to just enjoy my time with my family and not have to talk about it. Sometimes I want to just get my groceries or eat my dinner or play with my kids. It's tiresome.
Posted on 10/30/14 at 11:04 am to TheSexecutioner
quote:
re·tard
verb
ri'tärd/
1.
delay or hold back in terms of progress, development, or accomplishment.
Why pigeon hole a word that has so many uses into just a reference to the mentally handicapped? Sure, when used to compare a normally developed human to a mentally handicapped person it could be offensive.
However, saying a process "is retarded" could actually be correct and has nothing to do with the mentally handicapped.
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