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Is Marriage Worth the Trouble for Women?

Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:42 pm
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:42 pm
Psyghology Today article

quote:

First, confounding the view of marriage as the female heaven and haven is the fact that marriage actually appears to benefit men more than it does women. Research has shown that the "marriage benefits"—the increases in health, wealth, and happiness that are often associated with the status—go disproportionately to men. Married men are better off than single men. Married women, on the other hand, are not better off than unmarried women.

Second, in contrast to the myth that marriage is a woman’s ultimate and sacred fulfillment is the reality that roughly two-thirds of divorces are initiated by women. This is true not only for the young and hip: A recent AARP survey of 1147 men and women ages 40-79 who experienced a divorce in their 40s, 50s, or 60s, found that 66% of women said they initiated the split.


quote:

According to Rosenfeld, these data suggest that the tendency for women to initiate breakups is not an inherent feature of male-female relationships. Rather, it is a feature of male-female marriage. This finding appears to provide support for the notion that women experience the institution of marriage as oppressive, in large part because it emerged from and still carries the imprint of a system of female subjugation.


keep on pushing the feminist myth devaluing women settling down in order to display their independence by being sexually promiscuous and you'll continue to see the "hookup culture" that TRULY devalues women. men evolved to have to pay a steep price for steady sex and quality breeding partners and if that cost is lowered, we gain a major advantage.

quote:

People’s expectations—a variable not measured in Rosenfeld’s data—may also play a role in relationship satisfaction. If the culture sets women’s expectations for marriage high and men’s low, then the reality of marriage, in which men benefit more, may elicit increased satisfaction in men—“This is much better than I expected"—and decreased satisfaction in women.

Moreover, while Rosenfeld’s work may shed light on the "push" side of the decision to leave, the equation he outlines is probably incomplete as it neglects the "pull" side. In general, life decisions are multiply determined. Internal states such as marital satisfaction are likely to be weighed in the decision-making process against external variables such as societal attitudes about divorce, or the ability to maintain contact with children and financial security after divorce. Indeed, existing data attests to the importance of such external pull factors in shaping decisions of both men and women.


these talking points, in contrast to the above, are actually quite brilliant and intriguing

one of the "pull" factors is that men are willing to suck it up in a bad relationship to maintain a close relationship/access to their children. the slanted judicial system has really created a penalty for marriage in this regard, so that's not shocking. on the flip side, the slanted system makes it MUCH more beneficial to women b/c they don't face the same sort of punishment for leaving (as they win custody and visitation the VAST majority of the time)

as another "pull", women are less likely to leave if they're UNemployed
This post was edited on 6/12/16 at 6:49 pm
Posted by fr33manator
Baton Rouge
Member since Oct 2010
124111 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:46 pm to
No. Cheaper to rent them.
This post was edited on 6/12/16 at 6:46 pm
Posted by Teddy Ruxpin
Member since Oct 2006
39575 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:46 pm to
quote:

as another "pull", women are less likely to leave if they're employed


Hm, I would have guessed they would be more likely to leave being employed.

What's the theory on this?
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:48 pm to
i COMPLETELY fricked that up
Posted by Teddy Ruxpin
Member since Oct 2006
39575 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:50 pm to
quote:

i COMPLETELY fricked that up


My mind was kinda blown there for a second trying to come up with a good theory. I was going to base it on education or having goals and not experiencing "housewife boredom."
Posted by Mars duMorgue
Sunset Dist/SF
Member since Aug 2015
2816 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:50 pm to
I'm betting that for more and more of today's women, the only time they really, really long for marriage is ... when they're drunk with their little buddies, and they're all wimmenweird on alcohol.

Then they sober up and say frick, I don't want kids and some a-hole who farts at will and ends up a fat, bald porn addict.
Posted by upgrayedd
Lifting at Tobin's house
Member since Mar 2013
134860 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:50 pm to
Once again, women don't want men to experience any pleasure in life unless they approve said pleasure. If there's a group that hates individual freedoms, it's feminists. Ironic that they have so much in common with Islam
Posted by Ryan3232
Valet driver for TD staff
Member since Dec 2008
25794 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:50 pm to
People think too much


But to play along, i disagree with the article
This post was edited on 6/12/16 at 6:52 pm
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:51 pm to
no no that was a type

employment = more security on their own

no employment = less security and a "pull" to stay with the breadwinner
Posted by colorchangintiger
Dan Carlin
Member since Nov 2005
30979 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:52 pm to
quote:

Married women, on the other hand, are not better off than unmarried women.




Single moms are better off than a nuclear family. One income is better than two. One person doing household chores is better than two. A single opinion is better than two people who love each other reaching a consensus.

Give me a break.
This post was edited on 6/12/16 at 6:57 pm
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:53 pm to
quote:

If there's a group that hates individual freedoms, it's feminists.

that's actually interesting. i wonder if there is much data on that (i doubt it b/c that would be off limits)

BLM types are pretty anti-freedom
Posted by Teddy Ruxpin
Member since Oct 2006
39575 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:54 pm to
quote:

no no that was a type employment = more security on their own no employment = less security and a "pull" to stay with the breadwinner


Yup, Makes way more sense.
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 6:57 pm to
quote:

Single moms are better off than a nuclear family. One income is better than two. One person doing household chores is better than two. A single opinion is better than two people who love each other reaching a consensus.

it actually has a name

nuclear family privilege

LINK
Posted by colorchangintiger
Dan Carlin
Member since Nov 2005
30979 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:02 pm to
A fricking privilege. Like it's all happenstance and magic. It doesn't take hard work to maintain a good marriage. It's all luck and social position.
Posted by MBclass83
Baton Rouge
Member since Oct 2010
9354 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:03 pm to
Sometimes women just get sick of the BS, especially when the partner isn't pulling their share of the load, kids, chores, money for example.
Posted by upgrayedd
Lifting at Tobin's house
Member since Mar 2013
134860 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:03 pm to
quote:

that's actually interesting. i wonder if there is much data on that (i doubt it b/c that would be off limits)

Feminism of the 60s and 70s was based on liberation. Modern Feminism is based on restriction of rights of others (1A in particular) and isolationism.
Posted by TheWalrus
Member since Dec 2012
40486 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:04 pm to
While it doesn't specifically say single moms, that does run counter to the constant single mom struggle we usually see.
Posted by Mr.Perfect
Louisiana
Member since Mar 2013
17438 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:04 pm to


Nothing in a marriage benefits the man
Posted by SlowFlowPro
Simple Solutions to Complex Probs
Member since Jan 2004
422393 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:06 pm to
quote:

A fricking privilege. Like it's all happenstance and magic

it is. you didn't know that?

Posted by Rebel
Graceland
Member since Jan 2005
131368 posts
Posted on 6/12/16 at 7:06 pm to
marriage is mostly a business decision for women.

usually takes 5-10 years to know if they made a wise or poor decision.

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