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Started By
Message
A Solid Obituary
Posted on 1/26/18 at 7:59 am
Posted on 1/26/18 at 7:59 am
I have no clue who this guy is, but his legend is captured well in his obituary.
LINK
Terry Wayne Ward, age 71, of DeMotte, IN, escaped this mortal realm on Tuesday, January 23rd, 2018, leaving behind 32 jars of Miracle Whip, 17 boxes of Hamburger Helper and multitudes of other random items that would prove helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
Terry is survived by his overly-patient and accepting wife Kathy, who was the love of his life (a fact she gladly accepted sympathy for during their 48 years of marriage). He is also survived by daughters Rebecca (William) and Jean (Jeff); sister Linda; brother Phil; grandchildren: Alexander and Hannah Hines (The Mesopotamians), Daphne and Erin Pistello (The Daffer and Peanut), Brendan and Owen Lahm (Phineas and Ferb) and Tessa McMurry (Smiley).
He is preceded in death by his parents Paul and Bernice Ward, daughter Laura Pistello, grandson Vincent Pistello, a 1972 Rambler and a hip.
Terry graduated from Thornridge High School in South Holland, IL, where only three of his teachers took an early retirement after having had him as a student. He met the love of his life, Kathy, by telling her he was a lineman – he didn’t specify early on that he was a lineman for the phone company, not the NFL. Still, Kathy and Terry wed in the fall of 1969, perfectly between the Summer of Love and the Winter of Regret.
Terry volunteered his service in the United States Army and was an active combat Veteran in the Viet Nam War.
He retired from AT&T (formerly Ameritech, formerly formerly Indiana Bell) after 39 years of begrudging service, where he accumulated roughly 3,000 rolls of black electrical tape during the course of his career (which he used for everything from open wounds to “Don’t use this button” covers).
He enjoyed many, many things. Among those things were hunting, fishing, golfing, snorkeling, ABBA, hiking Turkey Run, chopping wood, shooting guns, Bed Bath & Beyond, starlight mints, cold beer, free beer, The History Channel, CCR, war movies, discussing who makes the best pizza, The Chicago White Sox, old Buicks, and above all, his family.
He was a renowned distributor of popsicles and ice cream sandwiches to his grandchildren. He also turned on programs such as “Phineas and Ferb” for his grand-youngins, usually when they were actually there.
He despised “uppity foods” like hummus, which his family lovingly called “bean dip” for his benefit, which he loved consequently. He couldn’t give a damn about most material things, and automobiles were never to be purchased new. He never owned a personal cell phone and he had zero working knowledge of the Kardashians.
Terry died knowing that The Blues Brothers was the best movie ever, (young) Clint Eastwood was the baddest-arse man on the planet, and hot sauce can be added to absolutely any food.
Tremendous and heartfelt thanks go to the truly exceptional nurses at Southlake Methodist Hospital Neuro-Intensive Care Unit, who provided much more than nursing care for Terry, but also provided a peaceful and compassionate environment during his transition from this life to the next.
Friends can visit with the family on Saturday, January 27, from Noon until the time of the Funeral Service at 4:00 PM, with Pastor Mark Wilkins officiating, at Geisen Funeral, Cremation & Receptions Centre, 606 E. 113th Ave., Crown Point, IN. Services will conclude at the funeral home.
Memorial donations in Terry’s name can be made to your favorite charity or your favorite watering hole, where you are instructed to tie a few on and tell a few stories of the great Terry Ward.
LINK
Terry Wayne Ward, age 71, of DeMotte, IN, escaped this mortal realm on Tuesday, January 23rd, 2018, leaving behind 32 jars of Miracle Whip, 17 boxes of Hamburger Helper and multitudes of other random items that would prove helpful in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
Terry is survived by his overly-patient and accepting wife Kathy, who was the love of his life (a fact she gladly accepted sympathy for during their 48 years of marriage). He is also survived by daughters Rebecca (William) and Jean (Jeff); sister Linda; brother Phil; grandchildren: Alexander and Hannah Hines (The Mesopotamians), Daphne and Erin Pistello (The Daffer and Peanut), Brendan and Owen Lahm (Phineas and Ferb) and Tessa McMurry (Smiley).
He is preceded in death by his parents Paul and Bernice Ward, daughter Laura Pistello, grandson Vincent Pistello, a 1972 Rambler and a hip.
Terry graduated from Thornridge High School in South Holland, IL, where only three of his teachers took an early retirement after having had him as a student. He met the love of his life, Kathy, by telling her he was a lineman – he didn’t specify early on that he was a lineman for the phone company, not the NFL. Still, Kathy and Terry wed in the fall of 1969, perfectly between the Summer of Love and the Winter of Regret.
Terry volunteered his service in the United States Army and was an active combat Veteran in the Viet Nam War.
He retired from AT&T (formerly Ameritech, formerly formerly Indiana Bell) after 39 years of begrudging service, where he accumulated roughly 3,000 rolls of black electrical tape during the course of his career (which he used for everything from open wounds to “Don’t use this button” covers).
He enjoyed many, many things. Among those things were hunting, fishing, golfing, snorkeling, ABBA, hiking Turkey Run, chopping wood, shooting guns, Bed Bath & Beyond, starlight mints, cold beer, free beer, The History Channel, CCR, war movies, discussing who makes the best pizza, The Chicago White Sox, old Buicks, and above all, his family.
He was a renowned distributor of popsicles and ice cream sandwiches to his grandchildren. He also turned on programs such as “Phineas and Ferb” for his grand-youngins, usually when they were actually there.
He despised “uppity foods” like hummus, which his family lovingly called “bean dip” for his benefit, which he loved consequently. He couldn’t give a damn about most material things, and automobiles were never to be purchased new. He never owned a personal cell phone and he had zero working knowledge of the Kardashians.
Terry died knowing that The Blues Brothers was the best movie ever, (young) Clint Eastwood was the baddest-arse man on the planet, and hot sauce can be added to absolutely any food.
Tremendous and heartfelt thanks go to the truly exceptional nurses at Southlake Methodist Hospital Neuro-Intensive Care Unit, who provided much more than nursing care for Terry, but also provided a peaceful and compassionate environment during his transition from this life to the next.
Friends can visit with the family on Saturday, January 27, from Noon until the time of the Funeral Service at 4:00 PM, with Pastor Mark Wilkins officiating, at Geisen Funeral, Cremation & Receptions Centre, 606 E. 113th Ave., Crown Point, IN. Services will conclude at the funeral home.
Memorial donations in Terry’s name can be made to your favorite charity or your favorite watering hole, where you are instructed to tie a few on and tell a few stories of the great Terry Ward.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:15 am to WhiskeyThrottle
quote:ill be making my donation to Freds so that a handful of young whipper snappers can drink for free tonight
Memorial donations in Terry’s name can be made to your favorite charity or your favorite watering hole,
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:19 am to WhiskeyThrottle
quote:
He despised “uppity foods” like hummus, which his family lovingly called “bean dip” for his benefit, which he loved consequently.
quote:
he had zero working knowledge of the Kardashians.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:21 am to WhiskeyThrottle
I’ve seen better obituaries in the quad on a Tuesday.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:33 am to WhiskeyThrottle
I need to start working on mine now to even come close to something that funny.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:33 am to WhiskeyThrottle
Have an upvote....$100 he wrote it himself
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:37 am to AbitaFan08
And this would be where the quad joke has jumped the shark.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:38 am to WhiskeyThrottle
quote:
Viet Nam
Subtle.
Great obituary, it sounds like the guy truly lived life.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:40 am to WhiskeyThrottle
No mention of weed in there but something tells me this dude toked it up with the best of em.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:51 am to WhiskeyThrottle
quote:Dude went out smiling.
nurses at Southlake Methodist Hospital Neuro-Intensive Care Unit, who provided much more than nursing care for Terry,
Posted on 1/26/18 at 8:55 am to WhiskeyThrottle
Good stuff.
Thanks for posting
Thanks for posting
Posted on 1/26/18 at 9:20 am to WhiskeyThrottle
Terry... future generations will sing songs of his life
Posted on 1/26/18 at 9:27 am to terd ferguson
thank you for posting...this week has had too much death and dying for me and I needed something to make me smile!!!
Posted on 1/26/18 at 9:32 am to WhiskeyThrottle
That is awesome. I hope to have an obit like that of my own one day.
Also, when I do eventually pass this mortal coil, I plan to do it with zero knowledge of what a Kardashian is or does.
Also, when I do eventually pass this mortal coil, I plan to do it with zero knowledge of what a Kardashian is or does.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 9:59 am to WhiskeyThrottle
A couple of random folks somewhere over New Mexico or Arizona this afternoon will get free drinks on me in honor of Terry.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 10:01 am to WhiskeyThrottle
quote:
He despised “uppity foods” like hummus
quote:
Preceded in death by a hip
Posted on 1/26/18 at 10:06 am to WhiskeyThrottle
Dude looks like Sammy Hagar's dad.
Posted on 1/26/18 at 10:20 am to WhiskeyThrottle
This was great. Hope someone can say that about me one day. But hopefully not anytime soon...
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