re: Craziest Thing Someone At Your Place Of Employment Was Caught Doing?

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That makes no sense to me. I'm a low-level manager. I mostly relay orders, with some input into hiring, firing, and compensation. But even so, I doubt anyone would have the balls to come to me and say, "the guys in China said that one of your employees requested reimbursement for a massage so we're firing him." There has to be more to the story than that, or you're talking about a seriously dysfunctional organization.

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He tried to expense a session with a sex worker. Not sure what you are confused about.

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Morbidly obese girl used a very loud vibrator in the bathroom stall. I had to write that skank up. Was a lot of fun wording the documentation for the file.

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Oh, now I remember a story.

This was at a company that supplied marine radios and radars and whatnot, mostly to the offshore oil industry. Our HR director was a pretty nasty middle-aged chick who liked to talk about S&M and stuff.

She had been carrying this black leather bag (like something a old-timey doctor would have brought on a house call) to and from work. One day our ops manager was looking for something (company credit card, maybe) and opened the mystery bag. It was chock full of dildos and dildo accessories.

HR chick was admonished not to bring dildos to work, but she just couldn't comply and got fired... over her dildo addiction.

I'm kind of a bottom-feeder so I'd have helped her out if I'd been single at the time.

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went and smoked meth at lunch, came back and completely passed out.

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That wasn't meth. You don't pass out after doing methamphetamine.

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This shite here fricking scares me.
It's one thing to go to a shady arse tire shop and get ripped off on a set of tires, but this is fricking disturbing.

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If it makes you feel any better, that is the only MT I've ever worked with in all my many years that didn't care. All the others are completely paranoid about turning out incorrect results and fret about any mistake for years, even when it was not their fault. And they turn out tens of thousands of results every year. Also, why I never suggest any young person to get into the medical lab field. The above tech got out of patient care and works as a phone service rep.

Major defense contractor; guy was spying for the Russians. FBI was on the way to the facility to arrest him and somebody with inside info called him at work and told him. He managed to get off site before the feds got there and got away. We heard later through friends or relatives of his that he escaped to Russia and was living there.

Executive Secretary announced in a sexual harassment meeting that she was sleeping with the Executive Director.

He was reassigned to Texas, she was let go.

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Two chicks

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First job I got out of the Army they decide to have a company fishing trip near Galliano or something. The night before everyone got together at a local bar and quite a few people got shitfaced. Two of my female coworkers started making out with each other. As a result, that became the first and last annual company fishing trip.

Same company, on Fridays someone who had a company credit card would buy daiquiris or beer for everyone in the office. Some would get crazy with it and add extra shots and people would be leaving the office already three sheets to the wind. One guy who was just hired was fired because he had a beer with lunch at a restaurant across the street. I thought that was bullshite though, the guy probably thought it was OK because they did the Friday drinks thing.

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"I was alerted by a dull buzzing sound and the smell of spoiled balogna"

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Pretty much how it went down. Pun intended.