Give us the cliffs of your wedding day

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quote:

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My wife and I waited to sex until we were married

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How long did y'all date?

shut up, chris

3 terrible threads on the front page



hey man, do you prefer ranch or bleu cheese? OH BOY WHAT A CHOICE TO MAKE!!1!

Woke up, started drinking mimosas. Hung out at the house with friends all day drinking mimosas.

Got married in the backyard. Switched over to just champagne. Kept checking lsu it score through wedding and pictures.

Temp dropped 20 degrees. Kept drinking. Everyone ended up inside watching football.

At about 2am a friend's husband decided to go sleep with nature and wandered off into the woods. Everyone else looked for him but a friend and I who got in the hot tub and kept drinking.

He was found asleep in someone's car.

The end.

Somehow no hangover.

new years day.

woke up. went to the soon to be "our" apartment. watched the Cotton Bowl where Phil Fulmer stuck a volunteer up our ***.

Played Halo with my two best friends. Got dressed.

Went to church. Got married. Went to reception. Got money from family.

went back to apartment where she kicked me out to change and no sexy time till we get to destination.

drove to San Antonio and she slept the whole time.

checked into riverwalk hotel. overlooked the river for a while and talked.

awkward first timer sex, but success achieved on both ends.

wake up next morning and look at river. it smells terrible and is less than 1 foot deep. they apparently dam it up Jan 2 and clean out the trash.

woke up
went to lunch
got a straight razor shave
got pulled over for speeding
got hitched
got drunk
pound town

Woke up, played video games, got dressed, got married, drove to Houston to fly to Costa Rica.

went to walk ons, started to get drunk, realized I forgot ring, drove back to get it, kept getting drunk, went to church, priest was 30 min late, went to reception, had a fuggin blast that included lee greenwood, topgun, and toby keith karaoke thanks to the dj's microphone. went out downtown after, bourbon street with friends in town the next day then flew to punta cana for honeymoon

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Groomsmen took me out the night before and got me shitfaced. One of them had to carry me back to room over his shoulder. He dropped me head first on the floor when he was trying to put the key in the door. So I had a rugburn on my forehead.

Woke up at about 9 in the morning to find the bathroom covered in blood. A lot of blood. My best man was naked in the bathtub with blood all over him. He had a bunch of really deep cuts on his hand. I woke him up and asked what the frick happened. He claimed he got into a knife fight with a midget. I had one of my other groomsmen drive him to the hospital to get stitched up.

So my bride walks up the aisle at our 2 PM wedding and sees a big rug burn on my forehead and my best man with bandages all over his hands and the first thing she says, right in front of the preacher is "What the frick did yall do last night?"