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Good website for Aggie jokes..
Posted on 12/7/10 at 11:28 am
Posted on 12/7/10 at 11:28 am
what do you have?
Posted on 12/7/10 at 11:30 am to Xenophon
texags
This post was edited on 12/7/10 at 11:31 am
Posted on 12/7/10 at 11:45 am to Xenophon
How do you spot an Aggie on an offshore rig?
...she's the one throwing bread to the helicopter.
/sorry. no website.
...she's the one throwing bread to the helicopter.
/sorry. no website.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 12:20 pm to The_Pistol
thats good. Police found a dead body in a closet at A&M. It was the 1939 hide and seek champ.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 12:32 pm to yakn2ya
What does the Unibomber and a Aggie girl have in common?
They bother got fingered by a relative.
They bother got fingered by a relative.
This post was edited on 12/7/10 at 1:01 pm
Posted on 12/7/10 at 12:52 pm to Beachtiger
One year, the Aggies were flying into Baton Rouge from College Station on a 4-engine jet. About 30 minutes into the flight the captain comes on the P.A. system. "Ladies and genltemen, we have a problem. We have lost an engine, but don't worry, we'll still make it to Baton Rouge, we'll just be an hour late."
30 minutes later, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Regretably, we have lost a second engine, but not to worry, we'll still get there, just two hours behind schedule."
30 minutes later, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Regretably, we have lost a third engine, but not to worry, we'll still get there, just three hours behind schedule."
By now the players and other flyers were getting restless. After all, the game was at 7 and their flight was schedule for noon. So, 15 minutes later, when the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, I am sorry, but we have lost our final engine," the team captain stood and shouted, "Oh, let me guess, we're gonna be FOUR hours late now?!"
30 minutes later, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Regretably, we have lost a second engine, but not to worry, we'll still get there, just two hours behind schedule."
30 minutes later, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Regretably, we have lost a third engine, but not to worry, we'll still get there, just three hours behind schedule."
By now the players and other flyers were getting restless. After all, the game was at 7 and their flight was schedule for noon. So, 15 minutes later, when the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, I am sorry, but we have lost our final engine," the team captain stood and shouted, "Oh, let me guess, we're gonna be FOUR hours late now?!"
Posted on 12/7/10 at 12:53 pm to sec417r39
One day, a Aggie was visiting his LSU cousin, who was from Bunkie, to watch some football games. Before the games started, they went grocery shopping. The LSU student walked into a store, went up to an employee and said, "Ma'am, I'd like some 'taters, some 'maters, and some ernions." She supplied what they needed.
As they got in the car the Aggie said, "Man, you are SOOOO stupid. It's not 'maters', 'taters' and 'ernions', it's 'tomatoes', 'potatoes' and 'onions'. Let me show you how it's done." So his cousin agreed. The next store they got to, the Aggie walked up to an employee and said, "Sir, I'd like some potatoes, tomatoes and onions. The employee looked at him and said, "You must be an A&M grad." The Aggie looked proudly at his cousin and said, "Why yes, I am. How could you tell? My beautiful speech?" The employee said, "No, sir. It's because this is a furniture store."
As they got in the car the Aggie said, "Man, you are SOOOO stupid. It's not 'maters', 'taters' and 'ernions', it's 'tomatoes', 'potatoes' and 'onions'. Let me show you how it's done." So his cousin agreed. The next store they got to, the Aggie walked up to an employee and said, "Sir, I'd like some potatoes, tomatoes and onions. The employee looked at him and said, "You must be an A&M grad." The Aggie looked proudly at his cousin and said, "Why yes, I am. How could you tell? My beautiful speech?" The employee said, "No, sir. It's because this is a furniture store."
Posted on 12/7/10 at 12:56 pm to Xenophon
3 Aggies go into a bar and order a round of shots. 1 Aggie says, to 57 days. The others toast to 57 days. They order another round of shots and toast again to 57 days. After the third round round where they toast to 57 days, the bartender gets curious and ask what they were toasting? 1 Aggie tells him they "just finished a jig saw puzzle in 57 days, the box said 3-4 years"
:rimshot:
:rimshot:
Posted on 12/7/10 at 1:50 pm to Tigergreg
How do Aggies practice safe sex?.........Get rid of all animals that kick.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 2:12 pm to Xenophon
Did you hear about the Aggie that moved from Texas to Oklahoma? - raised the average IQ of both states :rimshot:
Posted on 12/7/10 at 2:16 pm to SwatMitchell
How does an Aggie (Male or Female) put on their underwear?
Yellow spots in the front, brown stripe in the back.
How do you know when you are getting close to College Station? If you should see some sheep in a field, blow the horn and they will back up to the fence.
Yellow spots in the front, brown stripe in the back.
How do you know when you are getting close to College Station? If you should see some sheep in a field, blow the horn and they will back up to the fence.
This post was edited on 12/7/10 at 6:04 pm
Posted on 12/7/10 at 3:33 pm to Xenophon
A tremendously wealthy Texas oilman had the “perfect” daughter: She was a senior in high school, absolutely gorgeous, had an IQ of 155, was valedictorian of her class and, at age 18, she did volunteer work at the homeless shelter, sang in the church choir, and was still a virgin.
The day after HS graduation, he sat her down and said,
“Well, daughter, it’s about time you decided where you want to go to college”.
“Well, Daddy, I’ve given this a lot of thought. I know you’re not going to like this very much, but I’ve decided that I want to go to Texas A&M. I hope you’re not too mad”.
“Well, daughter, I surely can’t understand why you’d make THAT decision. But if that’s what you have your heart set on, I guess that’s what we’ll do”.
So he buys his girl a new Corvette, and lays an American Express Black card on her, and packs her off to College Station.
And once she registers for classes at Texas A&M, she is TRANSFORMED into . . . an AGGIE.
Semester break rolls around, and the girl comes home to visit. She asks to talk to her Daddy in private.
“Well, daughter -- what’s troubling you?”
“Daddy, I have some bad news, and some good news”.
“Uh-oh. Maybe you should tell me the bad news first”.
“Well, Daddy -- I’m pregnant”.
“Oh my Gawd! What could the good news possibly be?”
“I don’t think it’s mine”.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 3:59 pm to OSchoenauer
Driver's ed was cancelled at aTm.........the mule died.By the way, they also had to cancel sex ed.
This post was edited on 12/7/10 at 4:00 pm
Posted on 12/7/10 at 4:07 pm to OSchoenauer
quote:
“I don’t think it’s mine”.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 4:21 pm to Hulk Hogan
quote:It's true. The jokes practically write themselves.
texags
Posted on 12/7/10 at 4:31 pm to LongLostTiger
quote:
“I don’t think it’s mine”.
awesome
Posted on 12/7/10 at 6:31 pm to Chitter Chatter
Just search for Aggie football. Its the joke that gives back year round
Posted on 12/7/10 at 8:25 pm to Xenophon
Two Aggie fans were walking through the woods when they came upon a set of tracks. The first Aggie fan said, "Those are deer tracks." The second fan said, "No, they're too big to be deer tracks. They must be elk tracks." As the debate continued, they got hit by a train.
Posted on 12/7/10 at 10:10 pm to nbogan1
Why don't Texas Aggies eat M & M's? Cause Aggies say they are too hard to peel.
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