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re: *The 2012 TD.com Soccer Board 2 Chainz True arse, No Lie Awards Ceremony Thread*

Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:54 am to
Posted by Dandy Lion
Member since Feb 2010
50248 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:54 am to
MOURINHO GO AWAY, DON´T ASK FOR ANYTHING, ADMIT THAT WE DON´T NEED A FRICKIN´TRANSLATOR. GO DRINK SPANISH WINE WITH FERGUSON, AND TAKE THAT WHINEY BITCH FROM MADEIRA WITH YOU.


OBRIGADO.
Posted by joey barton
Member since Feb 2011
11468 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:54 am to
quote:

ETA: Request for a sticky, guys. Maybe we'll get one before the awards show is over.


We'll get it sometime in February
Posted by WarSlamEagle
Manchester United Fan
Member since Sep 2011
24611 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:55 am to
quote:

How the hell did you make the pic in the OP? It's too awesome.

Found the base pic on Google, did some Photoshop work and pieced the bottom logos with the rest of the pic. Then I just did some rebrushing and added my lettering.
Posted by Dandy Lion
Member since Feb 2010
50248 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:57 am to
All hail Slam, his dedication is non par plus.

WSE, to you (I hoist a shitty Labatts and go to bed).
Posted by LSUSOBEAST1
Member since Aug 2008
28614 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 12:58 am to
quote:

OBRIGADO.


The only Portuguese word that I remember from my time immersed in the language.
Posted by joey barton
Member since Feb 2011
11468 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 1:03 am to
I frequently pronounce words that end in an "o" as if they end in an "a." I don't even bother trying to use it because it always comes out, "obrigada."
Posted by Dandy Lion
Member since Feb 2010
50248 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 1:05 am to
quote:

I frequently pronounce words that end in an "o" as if they end in an "a." I don't even bother trying to use it because it always comes out, "obrigada."
well, fricking pay attention, or the next time you´re in Portugal, Brasil, Mozambique, Angola, Cape Verde or Macau, you´re going to get your arse kicked (or penetrated).
This post was edited on 12/29/12 at 1:07 am
Posted by WarSlamEagle
Manchester United Fan
Member since Sep 2011
24611 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 1:07 am to
quote:

All hail Slam, his dedication is non par plus.

WSE, to you (I hoist a shitty Labatts and go to bed).



I enjoy concocting this stuff in my bizarre head. Has given me something to do over the holidays.

Adios, everyone. Will be back in a few hours for the United match.
Posted by LSUSOBEAST1
Member since Aug 2008
28614 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 1:07 am to
quote:

Mozambique


If you're white and have a beard they'll just laugh at you.
Posted by joey barton
Member since Feb 2011
11468 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 1:12 am to
Nah, by the time that I get to "thank you," it's pretty well established that I speak very little Portuguese. I just say "thank you" in English.
Posted by Bho
Lexington
Member since Dec 2007
24804 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 8:35 am to
quote:

Nah, by the time that I get to "thank you," it's pretty well established that I speak very little Portuguese. I just say "thank you" in English.



quote:

joey barton



Do you at least do it in your fake French accent?
Posted by Gmorgan4982
Member since May 2005
101750 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 8:43 am to
I don't know who 2 Chainz is. Does this officially make me old?
Posted by RandySavage
Member since May 2012
30822 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 8:49 am to
quote:


I am disappoint in the SB.


Well a team that didn't win either major trophy they were up for won "best team" soooo.....
Posted by Gmorgan4982
Member since May 2005
101750 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 8:51 am to
quote:

I am disappoint in the SB.
Not to mention the best poster didn't even get nominated for the award.

Well, he did, but WSE just chose to ignore it.
Posted by TFTC
Chicago, Il
Member since May 2010
22269 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 8:53 am to
quote:

Well a team that didn't win either major trophy they were up for won "best team" soooo.....


Calendar year, Macho Man...

They have lost once in all competitions this season...
Posted by WarSlamEagle
Manchester United Fan
Member since Sep 2011
24611 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 10:11 am to
Welcome to today's portion of the The 2012 TD.com Soccer Board 2 Chainz True arse, No Lie Awards Ceremony. I'm glad to see all of you made it back safely, especially those of you who decided to go to the 2 Chainz and Swagotelli after party.

Let's get to it, here are the Player Awards...

First, presenting the award for BEST PLAYER...some have called him the greatest player of all-time. A legend for Santos, the New York Cosmos, and the Brazilian national team...please welcome Pele to the stage!

Pele: "I am honored to be at such a prestigious event and even more honored to present this award to the world's best player. There is no doubt that this young man is the best on the planet, and he proved it this year time and time again for club and country. A brilliant dribbler with the greatest scoring ability since, well, me...the award goes to...Neym---"

(Security storms the stage again, dragging Pele off as he continues his congratulations speech to his protege...)

Security Guy: (leaning into the microphone) "Nope, it's Lionel Messi."



quote:

Lionel Messi: 100.0%


(As Messi steps forward to receive his award from 2 Chainz, RandySavage grabs him! "YEAH BUT YOU DIDN'T WIN ANYTHING. YOU'RE NOT A CHAMPION LIKE ME. YOU'RE GOAL RECORD MEANS NOTHINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG..." Security picks him up as well, off to join his pal Bho in a broom closet.



Up next, we swear this is our final underrated award. Those responsible for this have been sacked. Don't you worry.

The winner for MOST UNDERRATED PLAYER is...Michael Bradley, AS Roma and the United States!


quote:


Michael Bradley: 32.6%

Marouane Fellaini: 25.6%
Moussa Dembele: 18.6%
Jefferson Farfan: 11.6%
Antonio Valencia: 7.0%
Fraser Forster: 4.7%


(Surprisingly enough, no one cries out that Baby Bradley won the award only because his dad's the coach. Progress, America.)



And now, the award for MOST OVERRATED PLAYER. It was a hotly contested battle of inflated egos and overblown comparisons, but we do have a winner...Hulk, Zenit and Brazil!



quote:

Hulk: 25.6%
Arjen Robben: 18.6%
Everyone at Arsenal and Fernando Torres: 11.6%
Mario Balotelli, Neymar and Samir Nasri: 9.3%
Andy Carroll: 4.7%


(Wenger, once again, is irate that his team did not capture an award for the club. Hulk asks if the award comes with a transfer out of Russia.)



For our BEST PLAYER NOT AT A BIG CLUB, please welcome a manager not yet at a big club...Neil Lennon!

Neil Lennon: "And the winner is... (reads the envelope) 'Haha Bhoy's going to be so mad when he sees who we got to present this award.' No, wait, it's Michu, Swansea City!"



(Bhoy rants, Michu poses on stage with his sidekick Nathan Dyer, and Neil Lennon leaves the stage scratching his head.)



Up next, the award for BEST U-21 PLAYER. Presenting this award, our winner for Best U-12 Player...from FC Barcelona, Ben "Americaniesta" Lederman!

Ben Lederman: And the winner is...Mario Gotze, Borussia Dortmund and Germany!



quote:

Mario Gotze: 38.1%
Oscar: 26.2%
Stephen El Shaarawy: 14.3%
Isco: 11.9%
Christian Eriksen: 9.5%


(Gotze kisses his girlfriend and walks up to receive his award. He's not in a tux, but his favorite waterpark swimsuit.)



Up next, presenting the award for BEST GOALKEEPER, here's Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho!

Jose Mourinho: And the winner is...well, this must be a misprint. No, there is absolutely no way that a second-string goalkeeper won this award. I demand a recount and a move to the EPL. The winner is NOT Iker Casillas.


quote:


Iker Casillas: 32.6%
Gianluigi Buffon: 30.2%
Manuel Neuer: 19.0%
Petr Cech: 19.0%


(Everyone boos. A witch hunt is started by Bho and Hendo.)
This post was edited on 12/29/12 at 1:47 pm
Posted by BraveTiger225
Atlanta, GA
Member since May 2008
17662 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 10:18 am to
Posted by joey barton
Member since Feb 2011
11468 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 10:36 am to
Why would I pander to the French outside of France?
Posted by joey barton
Member since Feb 2011
11468 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 10:38 am to
Yes, would you like for me to get off your lawn?
Posted by RandySavage
Member since May 2012
30822 posts
Posted on 12/29/12 at 10:59 am to
quote:

Calendar year, Macho Man...

They have lost once in all competitions this season...


I mean I get it and they are looking strong to raise several trophies in 2013 but it seems like a team who's biggest accomplishment in 2012 is winning the Spanish Cup can hardly be the best team.

Real
Chelsea
Juventus
Maybe even City and Bayern and Dortmund should all have been before Barca and I really don't see how anyone could make a case otherwise.
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