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re: About to put my son in drug rehab. update page 20
Posted on 10/21/14 at 9:39 pm to ShermanTxTiger
Posted on 10/21/14 at 9:39 pm to ShermanTxTiger
Congrats on getting him into treatment. I hope & pray that it works for him.
I have experience on both sides of the fence with addiction, both as an addict & a parent of an addict.
From my experience as an addict, he isn't going to quit until he is ready to quit. Something dramatic will have to happen for him to wake up & decide that he is done with dope. At least that is how it was for me.
I cleaned up about 10 years ago & met my wife. She had a son from a previous marriage that was pretty much a carbon copy of me when I was his age. I saw the writing on the wall and did everything i could think of to try to get him to quit. It just caused huge problems at home with my wife & her family. It was a very tough time.
2 days after Christmas of 2007 I told my wife & mother in law that they had to do something & get him help. I actually printed out some paperwork for a rehab & I point blank told them...
"He needs to go to this place. If not here, somewhere, anywhere, but he needs help. If we don't do something, we will be putting him in a box."
I went offshore the next morning. I got a phone call on January 4th, 2008. He OD'd & had passed away.
Not a day goes by that I do not wish that I would have done more to prevent this from happening. Losing a child is something that no parent should ever have to go through & I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
My advice is this: DO NOT ENABLE HIM!!! Do not bail him out of jail, give him money or anything else that will enable him to continue to use.
I can't even begin to tell you how it feels to lose a child like this, but I can assure you that you do not want to find out. it's been almost 7 years & it still feels like it happened yesterday...
RIP Nic... I love u man...
I have experience on both sides of the fence with addiction, both as an addict & a parent of an addict.
From my experience as an addict, he isn't going to quit until he is ready to quit. Something dramatic will have to happen for him to wake up & decide that he is done with dope. At least that is how it was for me.
I cleaned up about 10 years ago & met my wife. She had a son from a previous marriage that was pretty much a carbon copy of me when I was his age. I saw the writing on the wall and did everything i could think of to try to get him to quit. It just caused huge problems at home with my wife & her family. It was a very tough time.
2 days after Christmas of 2007 I told my wife & mother in law that they had to do something & get him help. I actually printed out some paperwork for a rehab & I point blank told them...
"He needs to go to this place. If not here, somewhere, anywhere, but he needs help. If we don't do something, we will be putting him in a box."
I went offshore the next morning. I got a phone call on January 4th, 2008. He OD'd & had passed away.
Not a day goes by that I do not wish that I would have done more to prevent this from happening. Losing a child is something that no parent should ever have to go through & I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
My advice is this: DO NOT ENABLE HIM!!! Do not bail him out of jail, give him money or anything else that will enable him to continue to use.
I can't even begin to tell you how it feels to lose a child like this, but I can assure you that you do not want to find out. it's been almost 7 years & it still feels like it happened yesterday...
RIP Nic... I love u man...
6
Posted on 10/21/14 at 9:44 pm to jsmoke222000
Damn.
Some of ya'll have dealt with some heavy shite.
Some of ya'll have dealt with some heavy shite.
Posted on 10/21/14 at 10:29 pm to jsmoke222000
That's heavy. Sorry to hear that.
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:39 pm to iluvdatiger
Sorry to hear it. As a former addict I can offer a bit of advice. Doctors today are pushing suboxone... tell them to frick off. Seriously. On paper it seems like a good thing but it only worsens the addiction.
If used as directed it turns you into a walking emotionless zombie. It is so strong that if an addict decides to go back to their drug of choice they will need 4 times as much. The withdrawals from suboxone are worse than any other opiate and also last longer. Prior to going on suboxone the first time I used mild opiates like hydrocodone and oxycodone. After suboxone I switched to much, much worse things. Smoking heroin & fentanyl and snorting dilaudid.
No way you can ever force an addict to quit, it has to be their choice and their choice only. Once I decided to quit I tapered over several weeks. I would only allow myself to take a pill when the withdrawals were absolutely unbearable. After a week or so without any opiates it really is life changing. Its almost like being sober feels like being high.
The first time I quit for "good" the same problem with my sciatic nerve that got me addicted in the first place reared its ugly head again and I was bed ridden most of the time. I was in so much pain I had to go back on mild opiates just to be able to function. Thankfully a neurosurgeon got me fixed up and I wont touch the stuff anymore. Even after breaking my leg I refused meds on the ambulance ride and the hospital.
Its a long road but it can be done. And believe me, your son will be a totally different person without the drugs. When he is cleaned up you have to let go of the things he did while an addicted. Your son and your son the addict are two entirely different people.
If used as directed it turns you into a walking emotionless zombie. It is so strong that if an addict decides to go back to their drug of choice they will need 4 times as much. The withdrawals from suboxone are worse than any other opiate and also last longer. Prior to going on suboxone the first time I used mild opiates like hydrocodone and oxycodone. After suboxone I switched to much, much worse things. Smoking heroin & fentanyl and snorting dilaudid.
No way you can ever force an addict to quit, it has to be their choice and their choice only. Once I decided to quit I tapered over several weeks. I would only allow myself to take a pill when the withdrawals were absolutely unbearable. After a week or so without any opiates it really is life changing. Its almost like being sober feels like being high.
The first time I quit for "good" the same problem with my sciatic nerve that got me addicted in the first place reared its ugly head again and I was bed ridden most of the time. I was in so much pain I had to go back on mild opiates just to be able to function. Thankfully a neurosurgeon got me fixed up and I wont touch the stuff anymore. Even after breaking my leg I refused meds on the ambulance ride and the hospital.
Its a long road but it can be done. And believe me, your son will be a totally different person without the drugs. When he is cleaned up you have to let go of the things he did while an addicted. Your son and your son the addict are two entirely different people.
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:42 pm to porkrind
quote:
Sorry to hear it. As a former addict I can offer a bit of advice. Doctors today are pushing suboxone... tell them to frick off. Seriously. On paper it seems like a good thing but it only worsens the addiction.
I disagree with that. Someone can take 1mg of sub a day, be totally normal and never take opiates/opiods again
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:47 pm to jsmoke222000
quote:
2 days after Christmas of 2007 I told my wife & mother in law that they had to do something & get him help. I actually printed out some paperwork for a rehab & I point blank told them...
"He needs to go to this place. If not here, somewhere, anywhere, but he needs help. If we don't do something, we will be putting him in a box."
I went offshore the next morning. I got a phone call on January 4th, 2008. He OD'd & had passed away.
Not a day goes by that I do not wish that I would have done more to prevent this from happening. Losing a child is something that no parent should ever have to go through & I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
My advice is this: DO NOT ENABLE HIM!!! Do not bail him out of jail, give him money or anything else that will enable him to continue to use.
I can't even begin to tell you how it feels to lose a child like this, but I can assure you that you do not want to find out. it's been almost 7 years & it still feels like it happened yesterday...
RIP Nic... I love u man...
Holy shite!
I know I haven't seen you in years but I knew nothing of this at all. Mike or John never mentioned it. So sorry to hear that, man.
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:52 pm to lsu480
quote:
I disagree with that. Someone can take 1mg of sub a day, be totally normal and never take opiates/opiods again
Well, suboxone is an opiate and the person taking that 1mg is still addicted and will have withdrawals if the dont take it daily. I was a seemingly normal person taking 400-600mg of oxy or smoking heroin... but I was still an addict. 1mg of suboxone is as potent as 100mg of morphine, it just doesn't get you high but it certainly does dull emotions/senses. Withdrawals from freaking heroin are less severe and shorter in duration than suboxone withdrawals. I've known MANY addicts and none of them got cleaned up using suboxone.
This post was edited on 10/21/14 at 11:54 pm
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:58 pm to porkrind
quote:
It is so strong that if an addict decides to go back to their drug of choice they will need 4 times as much.
I used to work in a suboxone clinic. Its designed to rebuild the nerve receptors that opiates burn, what you are asserting here is incorrect.
Posted on 10/21/14 at 11:59 pm to porkrind
Just a FYI, suboxone is designed to have a higher attraction to the brains opiate receptors than any other type of opiate. It is designed that way to block opiates like heroin from being able to attach to the receptors. It is for that reason it is so difficult to quit... even more so than the original drug of choice.
If you are in such bad shape that taking suboxone for the rest of your life seems better than what you are doing now then by all means go for it. But to become a non-addict you cannot replace one addictive drug with a even more addictive drug.
If you are in such bad shape that taking suboxone for the rest of your life seems better than what you are doing now then by all means go for it. But to become a non-addict you cannot replace one addictive drug with a even more addictive drug.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:01 am to Cogsworth
quote:Yeah great advice. Someone has a problem, just beat it out of them.
Maybe an arse kicking is what he needs right now.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:03 am to MBclass83
quote:
The funny thing about insurance is that for the past 22 years I have worked for a group of doctors who have been providing me and my family with free medical care. Insurance has failed to notice that though.
Maybe I'm not following but you've been receiving free medical care through your employer but now expect them to pay for your sons rehab expenses?
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:03 am to VaBamaMan
quote:
I used to work in a suboxone clinic. Its designed to rebuild the nerve receptors that opiates burn, what you are asserting here is incorrect.
Wat?
That doesn't even make any sense. Opiates do not BURN receptors... insert JaguarsFan.GIF
All opiates/opioids ATTACH to and ACTIVATE receptors in the brain. They are not BURNED nor are they REBUILT by taking a drug like suboxone that has a even higher attraction to the receptors.
I'm sorry but someone at the clinic completely misinformed you about how opiates work in the brain and what suboxone was designed for.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:04 am to Ed Osteen
quote:
Maybe I'm not following but you've been receiving free medical care through your employer but now expect them to pay for your sons rehab expenses?
didn't get the logic of that either
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:06 am to jsmoke222000
quote:
I have experience on both sides of the fence with addiction, both as an addict & a parent of an addict.
You may be the most qualified treatment conselor I have ever heard of. I really hope you consider a change and move into that vocation permanently. Thank you for sharing.
OP- Please reach out to this guy. I think he has this pretty well dialed in. Good luck with your son. You are doing the right things.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:09 am to ShermanTxTiger
quote:
You may be the most qualified treatment conselor I have ever heard of. I really hope you consider a change and move into that vocation permanently. Thank you for sharing.
OP- Please reach out to this guy. I think he has this pretty well dialed in. Good luck with your son. You are doing the right things.
Solid advice. It was actually talking with a friend who was a former addict that got me to quit.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:49 am to Ed Osteen
quote:
quote: The funny thing about insurance is that for the past 22 years I have worked for a group of doctors who have been providing me and my family with free medical care. Insurance has failed to notice that though. Maybe I'm not following but you've been receiving free medical care through your employer but now expect them to pay for your sons rehab expenses?
I believe he meant that he has been saving his insurance company money for 22 years - insurance did not have to pay for his medical care because the docs that he worked for were treating him for free.
Posted on 10/22/14 at 12:53 am to Nynna11
quote:
I believe he meant that he has been saving his insurance company money for 22 years - insurance did not have to pay for his medical care because the docs that he worked for were treating him for free.
No insurance company would ever take something like that into consideration but I understand what he was getting at now
Posted on 10/22/14 at 1:36 am to stout
It was the toughest thing that i have ever had to deal with in my entire life. I remember going to the funeral home for the visitation & seeing him in that casket knowing full well that it could have so easily been me laying there 10 years ago. Seeing what his death did to my wife was a real eye opener & I tell my parents every chance i get how sorry i am for all the crap i put them through.
Part of me feels guilty for telling them that this was going to happen. I never meant for it to happen but knowing that i told my wife that her son was going to die if he didn't get help & then having it happen a week later just tears me up inside.
It's something that I've got to live with for the rest of my life. I just wish i would have done more to get him the help that he needed before it was too late...
Part of me feels guilty for telling them that this was going to happen. I never meant for it to happen but knowing that i told my wife that her son was going to die if he didn't get help & then having it happen a week later just tears me up inside.
It's something that I've got to live with for the rest of my life. I just wish i would have done more to get him the help that he needed before it was too late...
Posted on 10/22/14 at 1:55 am to MBclass83
take it from a recovering addict who has been through many programs. Was even in one for 38 months (not days). Rehab doesn't work. Been clean over 6 years and didn't change until i decided too and didn't need rehab or meetings.
He might need some medication...i would have him evaluated by a doctor...but for now..you're doing the right thing. He definitely needs to detox and get off the street. Rehab is good for that and he can't take the next step until that happens.
He might need some medication...i would have him evaluated by a doctor...but for now..you're doing the right thing. He definitely needs to detox and get off the street. Rehab is good for that and he can't take the next step until that happens.
This post was edited on 10/22/14 at 1:59 am
Posted on 10/22/14 at 2:23 am to MBclass83
Palmetto, eh? Big Frank will help him get in line quick. Palmetto is no joke. It's boot camp light as far as what you're doing. They'll sit in a circle every day and you talk about your issues-any BS and they all call you out on it. Good luck. An addict will give up everything in life to get his fix and until he wants to get sober will do so. That's a good place for him.
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