hot doug's announced two months ago that they would be serving their last hot dogs october 1. that news startled chicagoans. they seem to really love this place. before today i had never been - i had recommended it to other people based on rave reviews from friends whose opinions i trust. but i never thought it worth it to wait in the regular 30-90 minute wait that the place became famous for.

i figured i had to try this place before it closed, just to say i had been there. seems that doing that sort of thing gives people cred. i need all the cred i can get. i headed on up to hot doug's. got in the line that stretched around the building, but not quite to the house next door. figured it would move pretty quickly. but the line is deceptive. big groups crowd together, actually shortening the line's perceived length. but eventually a bottle neck forms at the door where it the line becomes single file. as a result, even when the line does not seem that long, it's still a long time coming before you can walk in.

as i waited, i talked to a man who had been two saturdays ago - one of the two days of the week that hot doug's serves their famous duck fat fries. he said he had arrived at 11 and didn't get served until 4. yes. 5 flippin' hours! for a hot dog. and he was back less than two weeks later. i thought to myself, "this is gonna be a great meal." it better be - i waited all that time in a chilly drizzle with temps hovering around 60. yes, this is july in chicago. another reason to dislike this city that does not connect with my heart in any way. as if this past winter weren't miserable enough. i sometimes wonder if what is common among all residents here is soul flagellation. how else could anyone describe how someone willing lives in chicago? great place to visit. soul destroying place to live.

after just 2 hours, i found my way into the tiny restaurant. on the wall on the right were the ten standard dogs - the regular hot dog and a few typical sausages on buns. these ranged from $2 for the fried corn dog to $5 for the andouille. next to it were another ten specialty dogs. these were the gourmet dogs ranging from 8 to 11 dollars. it seemed that everyone there was getting at least 2 dogs - and who could blame them after waiting 2 hours in line. one table of 3 had gotten what looked like every dog in the building. fatties. and were sampling them as fat dripped like dew from their lips to their ample bellies.

finally it was my turn to order. what's remarkable about this place is the owner and head chef, a guy who graduated at a famed culinary school, is always at the register making small talk as he takes orders. a very friendly guy who talks just enough to customers to ensure that no one will be waiting for a table after they order. even though there are only about 30-40 seats in the place, it somehow works, as the sign on the door says.

i went with the regulars (in truth, none of the people in line i talked with except that one guy had ever been to hot doug's before and were in the same boat with me) and got 2 dogs. the first was the char dog (2.50). the second was the foie gras duck sausage dog (10.00).

less than 5 minutes later, the dogs came out. the char dog looked very pretty. a sliced pickle covered bright red tomatoes that topped the neon green relish people here like so much. the dog itself was out of view. the bun steamed and with little seeds on it. first bite was good. but let's not get carried away. this was still a hot dog. i was satisfied with that dog, but worth 2 hours? no.

the second dog was more interesting. see pic for what it looked like. the foie gras was sliced in half inch circles and there were four that covered the sausage. there was a heavy aioli beneath it. long story short, i didn't think it was very good. it just tasted like i was eating seasoned fat or butter. i'd have preferred the delicious bun by itself with four slices of butter covering it.this is what it looked like - not my image:
i ended up having to get a fast cab home so i could pass some diarrhea on the comfort of my own toilet.

once again, chicago proves that when it comes to good food, it's no where on the map. so many people and so much hype, but when it comes down to it, there's nothing there. the only thing i would recommend someone in chicago eat is the italian beef at portillo's. everything else is just so fat or so chain.

if you noticed that this review is more about the line than the food, you understand what i'm trying to say. hot doug's is all about the hype and being able to say you ate there. it's a landmark, but the food itself is less memorable than the wait.