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How to Survive in Federal Prison--For the OT Bad Asses waiting to be sentenced.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:21 pm
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:21 pm
Don't drop the soap
This post was edited on 5/29/14 at 10:22 pm
10
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:21 pm to Charlie Arglist
No information on how to insert a cell phone in one's rectum....
This post was edited on 5/29/14 at 10:53 pm
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:23 pm to Charlie Arglist
Eta. Nice edit
This post was edited on 5/29/14 at 10:24 pm
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:23 pm to LSUzealot
State Prisons are way worse than Federal prisons.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:33 pm to Traffic Circle
quote:
State Prisons are way worse than Federal prisons.
That was my original search on google.....don't ask.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:40 pm to Charlie Arglist
quote:
Make use of your cellmates
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:43 pm to Traffic Circle
Parish/county jails are worse than both state and federal prisons.
This post was edited on 5/29/14 at 10:44 pm
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:45 pm to Charlie Arglist
So glad I'm not going to prison.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:45 pm to bencoleman
What about Obama's FEMA concentration camps?
How are those?
How are those?
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:47 pm to boosiebadazz
I don't know you tell me, you brought them up.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:48 pm to bencoleman
Oh, I thought they were right around the corner. My bad.
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:48 pm to Charlie Arglist
Unless that tells me how to make a good shank, it's no use to me
Posted on 5/29/14 at 10:49 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
Toothbrush, matches, and a razor. It's not that hard
Posted on 5/29/14 at 11:56 pm to Charlie Arglist
quote:
This may sound weird and uncomfortable, but could be life-saving: If you are concerned about getting attacked, sit when you go to the bathroom, and take your pants off completely. Since many attacks happen when you are using the toilet, it's easier to defend yourself without your pants around your ankles, so you would not trip.
Sound reasoning.
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:12 am to USMCTiger03
Plus nobody wants to fight a naked man
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:20 am to Robin Masters
quote:
So glad I'm not going to prison.
Not that I ever plan to be facing jail time, but I've always said that if I'm facing something in the 5+ year range I'm heading out. Kill me if you find me. I'll take that over prison any day.
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:23 am to SaintCajun
You'd be surprised how many fights happen in the showers, but the vast majority of fights happen over phones in parish prisons
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:28 am to JohnnyKilroy
quote:
Not that I ever plan to be facing jail time, but I've always said that if I'm facing something in the 5+ year range I'm heading out. Kill me if you find me. I'll take that over prison any day.
No. Not over 5 years. Dude, 5 years ain't shite, even in State. Federal is even better,
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:33 am to Charlie Arglist
quote:
Show allegiance to your race. It is crucial to your survival in the prison system to immediately show your allegiance to your race -- though this doesn't mean you have to join a gang to do it. If you are some white suburbanite 19-year-old kid that pledged yourself as a crip, and you used to buy the dope you got busted selling from your crip homeboys in the projects, that doesn't mean you can link up with them in prison.
Posted on 5/30/14 at 12:34 am to Charlie Arglist
Step #1 should be approaching the captain of the guards and asking him if he trusts his wife.
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