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re: What Did We Get Stuck in Our Rectums Last Year?
Posted on 12/27/15 at 1:01 pm to Btrtigerfan
Posted on 12/27/15 at 1:01 pm to Btrtigerfan
Penis: Magnets. Lol. Definitely one of those "This plan sounded much better in my head" plots.
Vagina: GOLF BALL—“WANTED TO DO PELVIC FLOOR EXERCISES”
Vagina: GOLF BALL—“WANTED TO DO PELVIC FLOOR EXERCISES”
1
Posted on 12/27/15 at 1:10 pm to KamaCausey_LSU
Louis CK might have stuck Darth Vader up his arse
This post was edited on 12/27/15 at 1:13 pm
Posted on 12/27/15 at 1:12 pm to BamaChick
And now I have started reading past years editions of this article.
Yeah, a domino really gets us going.
Preparation H or a remote control - both effective and doctor recommended.
Someone pissed off their girlfriend!
No kidding??
So, how did it feel??
Yeah, naked bike riding.
It was either Ex-Lax or the garden hose. He chose poorly.
"Hey Mom????"
Perhaps.
That's not how a blow job works, dummy.
The elusive real life sandy vagina!!!
Yep. Last place a husband goes is his wife's vagina.
Because without the cocaine use, this story would be ridiculous.
It's the one's with the actual patient quotes that really get me. I can't imagine how these nurses/docs don't laugh their arse off at these idiots.
quote:
EMBEDDED DOMINO IN PENIS "TO PLEASE THE LADIES"
Yeah, a domino really gets us going.
quote:
"PATIENT STATES HE WAS EXPERIENCING AN ITCHY RECTUM AND INSERTED A REMOTE CONTROL TO SCRATCH"
Preparation H or a remote control - both effective and doctor recommended.
quote:
"PATIENT STATES HE GOT DRUNK AND PASSED OUT AT GIRLFRIENDS HOUSE, AWOKE WITH SPOONS AND DILDOS IN RECTUM"
Someone pissed off their girlfriend!
quote:
LIT BOTTLE ROCKET; "IT DIDN'T GO WELL" - Rectum
No kidding?? quote:
"A PIECE OF A PLASTIC SPOON TO SEE HOW IT FELT" - Penis
So, how did it feel??
quote:
"RIDING BICYCLE NAKED, LOST BALANCE, LANDED ON POLE CAUSING TRAUMA TO RECTUM"
Yeah, naked bike riding.
quote:
"ATE OATMEAL, DECIDED TO STICK GARDEN HOSE IN HIS RECTUM & FLUSH SELF OUT"
It was either Ex-Lax or the garden hose. He chose poorly.
quote:
"12YOF GOING THROUGH MOM'S DRAWER, FOUND PENIS SHAPED 'PLEASURE ITEM,' EXPERIMENTING PUTTING IN HER VAGINA, COULDN'T GET OUT"
"Hey Mom????"
quote:
"PLASTIC SPOON AND PERHAPS A PENCIL" - Penis
Perhaps.
quote:
"INSERTED A LONG BALLOON IN PENIS TO HAVE GIRLFRIEND BLOW UP FOR SEXUAL STIMULATION AND IT BROKE"
That's not how a blow job works, dummy.
quote:
"A LARGE AMOUNT OF SAND" - Vagina
The elusive real life sandy vagina!!!
quote:
"PUT A BAG OF MONEY IN VAGINA TO HIDE IT FROM HUSBAND"
Yep. Last place a husband goes is his wife's vagina.
quote:
"BEER BOTTLE UP RECTUM & BOTTLE BROKE WHEN TRIED TO RETRIEVE BOTTLE W/ PLIERS. COCAINE USE PRIOR TO INSERTION"
Because without the cocaine use, this story would be ridiculous.
It's the one's with the actual patient quotes that really get me. I can't imagine how these nurses/docs don't laugh their arse off at these idiots.
Posted on 12/27/15 at 3:00 pm to BamaChick
Actually we do laugh our asses off. Back in my ER days at Ben Taub we had a file of X-rays like this. The chief of radiology called it "The Rectal Horror Picture Show"
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