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Started By
Message
re: Marriage? What's the point?
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:09 am to LNCHBOX
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:09 am to LNCHBOX
quote:
Found your issue.
You got that right.
I am not bashing an entire institution. My point is that marriage isn't for everyone. It was hard work and sometimes that hard work doesn't pay off for everyone involved.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:09 am to Col reb 2011
My married friends say their jealous of me at times cause I'm able to go out take random trips and live a carefree life for the most part
You can't do this when married?
You can't do this when married?
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:09 am to tgrbaitn08
Yeah sounds like she got too comfortable. You can't let yourself go as a woman or your man may stray.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:10 am to Col reb 2011
quote:
My married friends say their jealous of me at times cause I'm able to go out take random trips and live a carefree life for the most part.
They sound like people. for the most part, who did not understand what being married was about. If I had wanted to remain carefree and have no responsibilities to anyone else, I'd have not gotten married. I'm not badmouthing anyone that feels that way! But you can;t really have both.
quote:
They all have kids with more on the way never leaving the house except for work and birthday parties.
When kids are young it's a full time gig...it goes with the territory. Again...to be done well, it requires someone who is not personally selfish and is willing to give up part of themselves for what they perceive to be the good of another.
quote:
50% of marriages end in divorce it doesn't seem to promising
Think of it as a bell curve. I look at that stat and suggest that it's that high because FAR MORE people who should never ever have gotten married or waited until they found a better match got married and then bailed because they either sucked at it or decided it wasn't for them. They're killing that average. Those that understood what it was going to be, waited until they were ready, etc have no real issues.
It's funny...nearly all of my good friends from high school that got married in their 20's like I did are still married...which puts most of their marriages at 15-20 or so years. But that makes sense as that group tended to be very much alike so it's not that unusual to think we'd have all made pretty good choices. the fact that we all seemed to luck out and choose someone that was really what we thought they were may be the bigger mystery.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:10 am to tgrbaitn08
Dual incomes and filing married for tax purposes
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:12 am to Col reb 2011
quote:
how awful it is..
not if you find the right girl
quote:
sex stops there
see above
quote:
constant nagging
if you let her pussy whip you from the beginning of the relationship maybe, see above
quote:
honey-do-list
see above
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:15 am to tgrbaitn08
quote:
sounds like you quit doing your job as well
Ummm, you have no idea how much I gave to that man/child. From cooking, cleaning, paying his bills, bringing him lunch at work etc. He kicked me and our one year old son out of the home and told me to find somewhere else to live. Hell, he still owes me back child support from 8 years ago.
Of course, he begged me back after he realized how much I did for him.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:15 am to Col reb 2011
Marriage, in and of itself, is one thing. You marry, it doesn't work and you divorce. The real decision is determining whether or not you want to have children with the person you marry. That is the lifelong commitment that shouldn't be taken lightly.
I married for the first time and it lasted 6 years before we divorced. No kids. That was twenty years ago and we haven't spoken since that time. No major animosity....the marriage just didn't work for either of us.
Remarried sixteen years ago after meeting the right gal. Three kids and happier than ever as our relationship has grown deeper through the years as we shared the struggles of jobs, relocations, deaths, kids, etc. If you find the right person it is more than worth it and you would not see it as pointless.
I married for the first time and it lasted 6 years before we divorced. No kids. That was twenty years ago and we haven't spoken since that time. No major animosity....the marriage just didn't work for either of us.
Remarried sixteen years ago after meeting the right gal. Three kids and happier than ever as our relationship has grown deeper through the years as we shared the struggles of jobs, relocations, deaths, kids, etc. If you find the right person it is more than worth it and you would not see it as pointless.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:18 am to Cajunchick
well there's always 2 sides to every story.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:19 am to Cajunchick
quote:
It was hard work and sometimes that hard work doesn't pay off for everyone involved.
Not bashing you...but when people say this it makes me kind of sad for them. Being married for me has never been work. Honestly. My wife and I have been nearly inseparable since we met about 21 years ago. To this day, we'd rather spend time with each other than anyone else or alone. Aside from being in love, we like each other. Genuinely.
In our case, we both knew what we were looking for and were clearly wired to make those small sacrifices you need to make in order to be with someone else. Not only did we bring the right attitudes personally, but we got lucky as hell that we matched up so well.
I was engaged to a girl before I met my wife, and we had been together for about 6 years. Thankfully she met someone else and called it off...that would have ended badly. The guy she met she ended up marrying and they are still married years and years later. We were wrong for each, but we knew how to be with someone. We had recognized that in each other at least.
Trust me...I'm thankful every day my marriage is not work.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:19 am to lsunurse
quote:
Yeah sounds like she got too comfortable. You can't let yourself go as a woman or your man may stray.
I have never let myself go. Even now, at 32 and after 2 kids, I look the same as I was when I was in college. My ex was just an a-hole.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:20 am to Cajunchick
how big of a girl are you?
women love assholes
quote:
My ex was just an a-hole.
women love assholes
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:21 am to tigerfoot
yeah, you hit the jackpot 2nd time around.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:22 am to GeauxTigerTM
quote:
we both knew what we were looking for and were clearly wired to make those small sacrifices you need to make in order to be with someone else.
This is what I meant by hard work. There has to be mutual sacrifices and in my marriage, there was only one side giving and the other was taking.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:23 am to tgrbaitn08
quote:
women love assholes
They don't understand the wonderful benefits of getting with and staying with a beta-male.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:23 am to tgrbaitn08
I am 5'3" and 120 lbs.
Luckily, the guy I am with now shows no signs of being one...yet
quote:
women love assholes
Luckily, the guy I am with now shows no signs of being one...yet
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:24 am to bamarep
quote:
That being said, you yourself have to be husband material.
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:24 am to Rhino5
Naw not depressed just have shirty luck with finding a decent girl.. It's tough when a girl leads you on for three months then sleeps with 2 of your friends the gets drunk at a bar both nights this past weekend and says I never gave her a chance and I intimidate her
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:25 am to Cajunchick
quote:
I have never let myself go. Even now, at 32 and after 2 kids, I look the same as I was when I was in college. My ex was just an a-hole.
We will decide pics of college and now
Posted on 2/11/15 at 9:25 am to Col reb 2011
So the sheep can follow societies life plan.
The typical ot lounger
The typical ot lounger
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