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re: How do I tell my wife that I don't like her gumbo?
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:20 am to RogerTheShrubber
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:20 am to RogerTheShrubber
Jeebus, we're talking food, gumbo. This ain't like telling her she doesn't know how to toss your salad after 8 yrs of trying. 
1
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:22 am to RogerTheShrubber
If you cant talk about something being wrong as small as a gumbo, what happens when bigger problems come up?
Just ignore them also and get run over mentally going forward.
this works both ways
Just ignore them also and get run over mentally going forward.
quote:
Nah, we're talking about social sensitivity, lies, etc
this works both ways
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:23 am to Jones
quote:
If you cant talk about something being wrong as small as a gumbo, what happens when bigger problems come up?
Probably should have thought of that 8 years ago.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:24 am to Taurus
Amazing that some people actually believe that keeping a lie going about how you don't like your wife's gumbo is acceptable.
What happens when something that actually matters comes up? What then? If you can't be honest about something as irrelevant as gumbo then I guess you just can't be honest about anything.
Should just go ahead and divorce her now. The marriage is doomed.
What happens when something that actually matters comes up? What then? If you can't be honest about something as irrelevant as gumbo then I guess you just can't be honest about anything.
Should just go ahead and divorce her now. The marriage is doomed.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:26 am to Jones
A little white lie is like a small deposit into a successful retirement account. Compounding interest makes it grow over time. It's not about what the lie was.
Either way, the flip side of the "it's just gumbo" argument works both ways. This dude probably eats his wife's gumbo 3 times a year. It was insignificant enough to not worry about it for 8 years.
Another way to look at it is his wife has probably grown to be very proud of that gumbo after many years of compliments from her husband's lies and what we can assume are her friends' truths. Again, never mind that it's just gumbo. In this case, it's a something she takes pride in that he will suddenly say, "BTW, I don't really like your gumbo. I just told you that to make you feel better."
I'd never withhold something like that from my wife, but if I did it for 8 years, I'd go ahead and just deal with that mistake.
Either way, the flip side of the "it's just gumbo" argument works both ways. This dude probably eats his wife's gumbo 3 times a year. It was insignificant enough to not worry about it for 8 years.
Another way to look at it is his wife has probably grown to be very proud of that gumbo after many years of compliments from her husband's lies and what we can assume are her friends' truths. Again, never mind that it's just gumbo. In this case, it's a something she takes pride in that he will suddenly say, "BTW, I don't really like your gumbo. I just told you that to make you feel better."
I'd never withhold something like that from my wife, but if I did it for 8 years, I'd go ahead and just deal with that mistake.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:29 am to Grim
For starters, looks like she doesn't know how to make a roux.
Prolly too much liquid, to boot. Not even gonna get started on making stock or seasoning...
Take her out to a joint or friend's where you know the gumbo is aces and then tell her, 'Honey, I never thought I'd taste better gumbo than yours but what we just had was AMAZING!!!!! Let's get that recipe and learn how to make it. Hey, then we can tell everyone that your gumbo is even more wonderful!'
If she doesn't buy that, you're fricked.
Prolly too much liquid, to boot. Not even gonna get started on making stock or seasoning...
Take her out to a joint or friend's where you know the gumbo is aces and then tell her, 'Honey, I never thought I'd taste better gumbo than yours but what we just had was AMAZING!!!!! Let's get that recipe and learn how to make it. Hey, then we can tell everyone that your gumbo is even more wonderful!'
If she doesn't buy that, you're fricked.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:30 am to Grim
You're going to miss that shitty gumbo when she's gone.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:30 am to GRTiger
quote:
Another way to look at it is his wife has probably grown to be very proud of that gumbo after many years of compliments from her husband's lies
except he isnt complimenting her. he says tries to avoid eating it.
quote:
Fast forward 8 years and I'm at the end of my rope. I usually come up with excuses for why I don't eat much of it, like I'm not feeling well or I had a big lunch or it's ramadan but she's starting to catch on and honestly I'm tired of the charade.
And no one is saying you have to tell her it sucks. There are ways to change the gumbo without being an a-hole. A crazy idea might be to cook the gumbo himself.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:32 am to Jones
quote:
If you cant talk about something being wrong as small as a gumbo, what happens when bigger problems come up?
You treat it like a bigger problem?
Is the argument that every "problem" should be handled exactly the same, whether big or small? Seems like you'd be complaining nonstop in all facets of life, from the home to the work place.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:33 am to GRTiger
He said that everyone else likes it, he's the only one that doesn't. I don't think it's a big deal. My wife would say something like, "well everyone else likes it so if you don't then that's your problem, don't eat it"! But then again my wife is an adult and doesn't get her feelings hurt over her cooking. If she thought I was telling her I liked something for 8 years and I really didn't, and it was just gumbo, then she would tell me to find something else to eat when she cooks gumbo.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:34 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
social sensitivity, lies
This is about food. If any man can't man up about his wife's bad cooking then the lies will only multiply and get bigger thus a bad marriage.
Hell, I tell my wife she needs to lose weight if she wants to wear certain clothes. Food? If it stinks, she hears it. Good thing is, that's rare, but if a dish is off even a little, she hears it. We have kids and them little shits are way less diplomatic about it.
She doesn't like it, but she wants to please so she will change it up next time. What a good woman does.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:34 am to Grim
quote:
How do I tell my wife that I don't like her gumbo?
say, "Wife, I don't like your gumbo."
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:36 am to Taurus
Your wife secretly hates you and herself
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:36 am to Taurus
Calm down Hitler!
I agree though.
I agree though.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:37 am to whoisnickdoobs
quote:
say, "Wife, I don't like your gumbo."
That's not being very social sensitive
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:38 am to tgrbaitn08
As would mine. I wouldn't have to ask OP's question about my wife, because I know she wouldn't care too much. Since he's asking, I assume that's not the case with his wife. There's a chance it wouldn't be a big deal if he just said, "It must be my tastes changing. I know everyone else likes it," but I don't know his wife, so my advice is based on the worst case scenario.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:42 am to Taurus
quote:
Taurus
Damn, man. Scale it back a bit. Not sure you're painting a happy marriage in your description of how you treat your wife.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:43 am to Grim
So did she divorce you yet?
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:44 am to Grim
OP, you made your bed here.
Posted on 10/24/16 at 11:46 am to Grim
You need to put on your big boy pants and just suck it up. You don't say shite. You let go for far too long.
One comment about the gumbo will open up Pandora's box for other shite to come out.
One comment about the gumbo will open up Pandora's box for other shite to come out.
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