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re: How badly did the women's lib movement ruin marriage for men?

Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:00 pm to
Posted by DaTroof
Louisiana
Member since Jun 2015
976 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:00 pm to
Marriage was ruined when states and governments turned it into a business contract with huge payouts. frick marriage in terms of what it means today. Better get that prenup signed or your arse is still on the hook for half of your shite when she starts to hit the BBC.
Posted by Bunk Moreland
Member since Dec 2010
53314 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:00 pm to
We've got to MAGA.

Posted by Mo Jeaux
Member since Aug 2008
58691 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:01 pm to
quote:

It is provided you do your homework before actually getting married.


See my post above about not all women being like that.
Posted by goldennugget
Hating Masks
Member since Jul 2013
24514 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:02 pm to
Feminism, specifically 3rd wave Feminism ruined marriage for men

Any man who gets married today is an idiot. Men have to bear all the risks in the marriage.

Most women these days are slots. They party too hard in their teens and 20s and are damaged goods once they hit the wall and get into their upper 20s and 30s. Why should I man up and marry a slut again? I don't care if she is a born again virgin or "changed". Doesn't change the fact that she has seen more cocks than a urinal and is likely an alpha widow who won't respect any man except the most alpha one who banged her
Posted by Mo Jeaux
Member since Aug 2008
58691 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:02 pm to
quote:

Marriage was ruined when states and governments turned it into a business contract with huge payouts.


And it was conservatives in large part (Ronnie signed the first no-fault divorce law in California). They were goaded by white knightism and protecting fragile women. It's deplorable.
Posted by goldennugget
Hating Masks
Member since Jul 2013
24514 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:02 pm to
quote:

See my post above about not all women being like that.


The term AWALT exists for a reason

Yes, all women are like that. Always.
Posted by Big Saint
Houston
Member since May 2009
1453 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:11 pm to
quote:

See my post above about not all women being like that.


See mine where I acknowledged that some do in fact exist like that but not all. Call me naive but I don't believe every single woman out there is like that and I come from a divorced home.
Posted by rocket31
Member since Jan 2008
41819 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 2:13 pm to
quote:

Unless you're ballin out of control I don't see why you would prefer less money 


Just lol

I can make my own money.

Despite the fact that combining finances is beyond risky.

Brb losing half my shite because on some random morning the wife decided she wanted a divorce and is "no longer happy"

Ot lounge logic
Posted by TheIndulger
Member since Sep 2011
19239 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 3:39 pm to
But if she makes more than you, you won't be losing half of your shite

If anything, the movement towards women having careers has made marriage a more attractive option for men, financially.
This post was edited on 10/24/16 at 3:43 pm
Posted by AbuTheMonkey
Chicago, IL
Member since May 2014
8003 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 3:46 pm to
quote:

Approximately 50% of marriages end in divorce. Of those divorces, approximately 75% will be initiated by women.


That's a pretty misleading statistic. It's more like 30% for first-time marriages, and when controlling for median income, education level, and ethnicity of (I would guess) most of this board, it's probably more like 10 to 15% for first-time marriages.

quote:

Let's not go too far down the special snowflake not all women are like that attitude. Women are humans that respond to incentives. Current economic and social factors in the U.S. heavily incentivize women to divorce.


I don't disagree with that at all, and I saw it first-hand in the Army all the time, but there are lots of obvious markers that are huge red flags to anyone with half a brain more often than not.

Always watch the parents. I have found that to be a tried and true method of predicting how a person's relationships will play out - it's obviously not 100% accurate and I am sure we both have examples of great people to date who are products of bad parental marriages and vice versa, but it will tend to play out that way much more often than not. If the mom and dad respect each other and treat other well even after decades of being together, odds are the girl probably has her head screwed on straight, too.
Posted by BluegrassBelle
RIP Hefty Lefty - 1981-2019
Member since Nov 2010
99019 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 3:53 pm to
quote:

frick marriage in terms of what it means today.


Marriage is what you make it. I've known far too many guys growing up that married a hot piece of arse because they wanted a hot piece of arse later in life that aged well, but didn't care about the "substance" at 20.

shite happens and people change. And divorce happens to good people from time to time. But majority of the time the issue was they weren't really compatible to begin with because they settled without taking stock of what life would be like 10 years from now.
Posted by Big Saint
Houston
Member since May 2009
1453 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 4:32 pm to
quote:

shite happens and people change. And divorce happens to good people from time to time. But majority of the time the issue was they weren't really compatible to begin with because they settled without taking stock of what life would be like 10 years from now.


That's what I said last page. These guys must have been in some seriously fricked up relationships.
Posted by SeasonOfSam
SELA
Member since Dec 2014
495 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 5:44 pm to
I read an article a while back and can't seem to find it now, but it truly applies here. It was much more verbose but got the point across.

In general, it was based on a girl asking the question: "Where are all of the good guys?".
The author's response was pretty spot-on. He said: "you can't cook, can't clean, have "wordly" tattoos and piercings, you've let yourself go, and you've rode the cock carousel all through your twenties and you want to know where the good guys are? They're dating good girls."

It also referenced a statistic that something along the lines of "if a guy makes it past 24 without getting married, he's got a 70% of being single through 35, and a 30% chance of never getting married". I can't even remember the exact percentages, let alone confirm if what he reported was correct, but it basically pointed to the fact that as men get older they begin to gain a better understanding of how drastically the deck has been stacked against us when it comes to modern marriage.


But it has always stuck with me because of the phrase "cock carousel"... That's a perfect description.


And save the argument about "If a girl sleeps around, she's a slut. If a guy sleeps around he's a pimp." I'm not saying that argument is appropriate, but it is the consensus of a lot of people. Accept it.
Posted by Zappas Stache
Utility Muffin Research Kitchen
Member since Apr 2009
38686 posts
Posted on 10/24/16 at 6:01 pm to
Not in my marriage. I cook, she cleans dishes. I do the yard, she cleans the house and does laundry. We have our own bank accounts for what we want to buy we split the cost on expenses. She pays for her car, I pay for mine. I think the problem is most me are attracted to the princess.....some masculine "I can take care of her" bullshite and the fear of a strong, smart woman that would call you out on your crap. I think men are as much to blame as the women in those sorts of princess/ prince relationships.
Posted by bcoop199
Kansas City, MISSOURI
Member since Nov 2013
6665 posts
Posted on 10/25/16 at 4:37 am to
Here's the thing that ticks me off. If a couple get divorced and he has even a bit of money he has to pay alimony. The "reason" is she's become accustomed to that lifestyle. Well he became accustomed to her cooking/Cleaning why shouldn't she still have to provide that for him? Women often say if she hadn't been providing that in the marriage he wouldn't have had the ability to focus on his career. Well then if she's no longer doing that after divorce how can the court determine he'll be able to make the same amount.
Posted by TbirdSpur2010
ALAMO CITY
Member since Dec 2010
134026 posts
Posted on 10/25/16 at 6:24 am to
Men need to love their wives.

Women to need to respect their husbands.

Start there, and a lot of bullshite falls by the wayside real quick.
Posted by molsusports
Member since Jul 2004
36112 posts
Posted on 10/25/16 at 6:31 am to
I don't think there's anything wrong with equal rights or egalitarianism. What gets to be pretty untenable is when you combine saying you believe in equality with expecting different treatments for different genders.

Some of the second wave feminists really understood and embraced this, but they have been delegitimized by third wave feminists who want the best parts of chauvanism (for example, unequal treatment in courts - both civil and criminal) to exist side by side with the best parts of equality.

There have been societies in which gender outcomes were more equal (look at career choices in authoritarian communist societies for example). But the trade off for this is a loss of choice or freedom. I don't think that's very valuable. If you don't want to be an engineer, or an educator then you shouldn't be forced into that as a career choice to balance population statistics.
Posted by bcoop199
Kansas City, MISSOURI
Member since Nov 2013
6665 posts
Posted on 10/25/16 at 1:15 pm to
Yep, those third wave feminist want equality as long as it benefits them. The second it doesn't then they want to be "treated like a lady" and want traditional values. It's easy to spot those women they usually look like a pitbull.
Posted by Hog on the Hill
AR
Member since Jun 2009
13389 posts
Posted on 10/25/16 at 1:43 pm to
quote:

These are societies list of expectations:
We have to pay the bills.
Women's lib actually made it so that women pay a much larger share of the bills today than they used to (it was pretty much 0% before women's lib)
quote:

We have to grill/cook.
Boo fricking hoo. Every adult should be capable of cooking simple meals. In marriages where both spouses work, both spouses should cook sometimes. I agree that a stay-at-home parent should cook most of the time, though.
quote:

We have to up keep the yard.
IMO both should be responsible for this, but in any relationship there should be a divvying up of responsibilities. If you end up taking over yard work, then have your wife do most of the house work.
quote:

If the house gets dirty, we may be expected to clean the house as well.
Like I said above, if you are doing yard work, expect your wife to do more house work. But you should still clean up after yourself.
quote:

We have to help with the kids and such.
This is a bad thing? You're complaining about having to parent your children?
quote:

We have to appear more devoured and be the constant romantic.
Yeah this is a complaint that I've had I was in a bad relationship with a woman who had some emotional issues (anxiety and depression) and she was way too needy. Her expectations were beyond reasonable. But I do think that it's important to have some romance in a relationship, and both partners should be expected to put effort into maintaining that romance. Neither partner should take the other for granted, and that happens way too often in long-term relationships. Women shouldn't stop blowing their men just because they're in year 2 of a marriage
quote:

If a split happens, we have to pay the wife
I think that depends on who earns more. Usually that's the man, so yeah, usually the man ends up paying alimony. There are definitely some fricked up things that can happen with alimony, though. I don't like that the spouse who earns more has to pay alimony in the event of the other spouse having an affair, for instance. Some states have exceptions for this, but you have to prove that an affair happened and that it caused the marriage to fail, and that's really hard to do and not worthwhile unless you stand to lose a shitload of money. People get totally fricked over by this kind of thing.
quote:

If a split happens, we have to pay for the kids
Depends on who gets custody, but again, almost always the woman. But taking care of your kids is your obligation and that's not a consequence of women's liberation.
This post was edited on 10/25/16 at 1:46 pm
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