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Started By
Message
Do you have a favorite Rodney Dangerfield quote?
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:31 pm
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:31 pm
The man was a comic genius. Self-deprecating one-liner after one-liner.
Here are my favorites. Whatcha got?
"Doc, every morning I look in the mirror and feel like barfing, what's wrong", he said "I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."
When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
Here are my favorites. Whatcha got?
"Doc, every morning I look in the mirror and feel like barfing, what's wrong", he said "I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."
When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
45
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:33 pm to Jax-Tiger
He always annoyed me
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:34 pm to Jax-Tiger
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:35 pm to Jax-Tiger
"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:37 pm to Jax-Tiger
The first movie I was in was so bad the premiere got walked out on. And it was held on an airplane.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:39 pm to Jax-Tiger
"Hey Moose! Rocko! Help the Judge find his checkbook!"
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:42 pm to Jax-Tiger
I'm sitting on top of the world but I've got hemorrhoids
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:43 pm to Jax-Tiger
That's skilled labor for an italian
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:44 pm to Jax-Tiger
Tell the chef this is low grade dog food. I can still see the marks where the jockey was hitting it.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:46 pm to Jax-Tiger
This steak still has marks on it from where the jockey was hitting it.
Ohhh baby, you must've been something before electricity.
Ohhh baby, you must've been something before electricity.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:46 pm to Jax-Tiger
"My wife says she wants to go somewhere she's never been. I say try the kitchen."
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:46 pm to Jax-Tiger
I don't like cocaine, I just like the way it smells.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:47 pm to Jax-Tiger
"The best thing about having kids is making them"
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:48 pm to Jax-Tiger
" we're all going to get laid!"
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:48 pm to Jax-Tiger
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:49 pm to Jax-Tiger
I was five years old before I realized there was no such thing as Alpo baby food.
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:52 pm to Jax-Tiger
The triple lindy 
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:54 pm to Jax-Tiger
My favorite was actually an audience interaction. "anybody got a cigarette? I left mine in the machine.'
Then "You got a match, I'm not doing magic up here, you know."
Then "You got a match, I'm not doing magic up here, you know."
Posted on 5/11/17 at 5:56 pm to Jax-Tiger
From Easy Money:
"My mother-in-law, for years I wouldn't kiss her face; I end up kissing her arse."
"My mother-in-law, for years I wouldn't kiss her face; I end up kissing her arse."
Posted on 5/11/17 at 6:03 pm to Jax-Tiger
quote:
My grandfatha' had a pacemaker. Every time he sneezed, the garage door opened.
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