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Started By
Message
Today was the funeral for my youngest son
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:34 pm
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:34 pm
He was born in 1981 and was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis in 1982. His average life expectancy at this time was 16 to 18 years. God gave us and him a tremendous cross to bear. He made it to the age of 42. On January 12, we found his body in his bedroom. When you have an unexplained death, it is treated as a potential homicide. They left his body on the floor for 3 hours while they did the required investigation. He was then taken away for autopsy. The remains were released to us on January 21. We will not know the cause of death for at least 6 weeks. At his friend’s request, we held a memorial service at the funeral home and then took his ashes with us to a bar he favored. His ashes were on a table next to me and my wife. We held a different type of wake. We had around 100 relatives and friends of Jeff there. There were several drinks for Jeff on the table next to his urn.
The sorrow for this makes my wife and I feel totally numb. The sobs and tears come in waves. A memory of him as a child, seeing some item in the grocery store that he liked, or just watching his dog look for him, and the emotions come to bear. They are flowing now as I write this. I had started a project scanning all of the family photos from albums into a digital picture frame. I know the memories will flow over me and it will be like several tidal waves of emotion. But if I do not do this then I run the risk of forgetting some of the precious time we had with him on this earth. I try to look on this as if God has decided to give us another cross to bear. I keep on asking God, I had my life, I am 74, why did you not take me? But that is not how this works. I have no choice but to honor his memory and lead the best life I can with the time I have left in this world and to not forget him. May God keep all of your children safe and may you never have the heartbreak of arranging your child’s funeral.
The sorrow for this makes my wife and I feel totally numb. The sobs and tears come in waves. A memory of him as a child, seeing some item in the grocery store that he liked, or just watching his dog look for him, and the emotions come to bear. They are flowing now as I write this. I had started a project scanning all of the family photos from albums into a digital picture frame. I know the memories will flow over me and it will be like several tidal waves of emotion. But if I do not do this then I run the risk of forgetting some of the precious time we had with him on this earth. I try to look on this as if God has decided to give us another cross to bear. I keep on asking God, I had my life, I am 74, why did you not take me? But that is not how this works. I have no choice but to honor his memory and lead the best life I can with the time I have left in this world and to not forget him. May God keep all of your children safe and may you never have the heartbreak of arranging your child’s funeral.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:36 pm to Purplehaze
Deepest condolences
Prayers sent
Prayers sent
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:38 pm to Purplehaze
So sorry May light perpetual shine on Jeff
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:38 pm to Purplehaze
Haze I am so very sorry.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:38 pm to Purplehaze
May your son rest in peace. I hope you and your family find closure.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:38 pm to Purplehaze
I am sorry.
Living to 42 with that diagnosis is the ultimate sign of kicking arse. Sounds like a good man.
Living to 42 with that diagnosis is the ultimate sign of kicking arse. Sounds like a good man.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:38 pm to Purplehaze
I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a dear friend from high school with Cystic Fibrosis.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:39 pm to Purplehaze
Sorry to hear, I don’t even have words. I hope you and your wife find peace.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:39 pm to Purplehaze
I'm so sorry you had to bear a pain that deep. I can't even begin to imagine. I hope God can provide you with peace and comfort in time. I'll pray for that for you and your wife who remain here in this world while your amazing boy has moved on to the most perfect glory of Heaven.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:39 pm to Purplehaze
Condolences. May God bless you and your family.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:40 pm to Purplehaze
Sounds like a great send-off for a well loved son and friend by all. Sorry you're hurting, PH. Best of wishes to your wife and other children
To Jeff
To Jeff
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:41 pm to Purplehaze
So deeply sorry to read this. So much love in your family; that, no doubt, will only grow.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:41 pm to Purplehaze
Tough to read. Nothing I can say will make it better. Life doesn’t make sense and my hope and prayer is that you will be reunited with him one day, God willing. Keep you eyes fixed on that image.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:42 pm to Purplehaze
So very sorry for your loss, but it's awesome that he lived on for so long. Sounds like he truly blew past all expectations.
You'll be in my prayers.
You'll be in my prayers.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:43 pm to imjustafatkid
I'll pray for you all and your son. He is now with God and whole again. ??
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:43 pm to Purplehaze
Prayers for you and your wife and family, friend.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:43 pm to Purplehaze
Prayers on the way… I feel for you.. so sorry.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:44 pm to Purplehaze
A lot of men read this board and will be better fathers after reading this. So your son is still making the world a better place.
You and your family are in my prayers.
You and your family are in my prayers.
Posted on 1/28/24 at 9:44 pm to Purplehaze
It sounds like Jeff lived a great life and had a wonderful father.
My sincerest condolences.
My sincerest condolences.
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