Samsung fricking me over

I got a Galaxy S7 and recently I got a dead line down the screen. Brought it to Verizon, they said it was covered and that Samsung would have me a new one the next day. I get the new phone, and they tell me to use the Samsung SmartSwitch app to transfer everything over. Seemed easy enough, I'd seen them do it in-store before and the phone was an exact copy of the old one.

Minor hiccup
The app is telling me that USB-to-USB connection was supported by one of the phones but not the other. They're both identical S7's, so it was weird to me. But whatever, I'll use the wireless transfer.

Major hiccup
None of my apps transfer. I select "transfer all" when prompted by the app, and it says it's transferring all of my apps and app data. At the end, it says transfer completed. Go to check the new phone, and it has all my pictures, contacts, videos, etc. But no apps.

I went on the play store and the reviews of the SmartSwitch app are almost all 1 star, saying it isn't working. Brought it to Verizon and showed them, they said it's a Samsung problem and they can't help me.