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Message
re: Interesting topic for OT parents... Sleepovers
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:32 pm to SirSaintly
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:32 pm to SirSaintly
No one will get mad at you.
I promise.
I promise.
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 12:33 pm
0
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:33 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
i posted those as proof of societal evolution since 1993
Are we talking about people beating up gays? How is it relevant? Those are changes in belief. Not evolutions of the species. Not things that make it less likely that there will be psychos and perverts out there.
For the record, I'm not saying that people should be overprotective. Im not saying your kids shouldn't do the same sorts of things you did as a kid.
I'm objecting to the idea that the world has changed in a way that makes a parent crazy for worrying about this stuff.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:35 pm to SirSaintly
quote:
None taken. Just pointing out how these sheltered kids end up going wild at school. Don't get mad at me if your daughters became sluts.
If my daughters ever let the likes of you (judging solely by your comments in this thread that display ignorance, a lack of empathy, and a disregard for the value of a woman) have any piece of their mind body or spirit I will certainly be sad about that.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:35 pm to uway
quote:
It would be great if your stupid ignorant arse would leave the thread. JMO no offense
he's being crude but he has a point
i'll apply it to the concepts of the thread
kids are having fewer teen pregnancies AND fewer abortions while living in a much more sexualized society? how is this possible?
the age of information has led to sex leaving the concepts of mysteries and becoming a normal part of everyday life for teens. while those in the "old" mindset think this will lead to calamity, what we see is that teens learn how to be responsible with sex at an early age. you don't have the same sheltered girls who go fricking crazy when they get their first sniff of freedom. you don't have stupid teenage girls who aren't on BC or don't demand boys use condoms. less unwanted pregnancies emerge.
it's counter-intuitive from the old mindset, but that's how we develop, and it's proving to work
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:36 pm to uway
Oh great. SFP is here to over think everything and use big words again.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:40 pm to SlowFlowPro
quote:
it's proving to work
Use of contraception leads to fewer unwanted pregnancies? :mind blown:
quote:
you don't have the same sheltered girls who go fricking crazy when they get their first sniff of freedom
I know girls who never did drugs or had sex in high school and didn't go crazy in college. They had sex in college, but they weren't sluts. Overall I would call that an improvement over them having sex with every high school boyfriend when they aren't as emotionally mature as they'll be in college.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:40 pm to GeauxxxTigers23
quote:
and use big words again.
i think the largest word i have used in this thread is information
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:41 pm to uway
quote:
Use of contraception leads to fewer unwanted pregnancies? :mind blown:
condoms weren't invented in 2000
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:45 pm to uway
quote:
Use of contraception leads to fewer unwanted pregnancies? :mind blown:
I think his point is that the use of condoms is no longer taboo in most households, and in families where sex is something that is spoken openly and honestly about, children are more aware of the consequences of unprotected sex, and are more likely to use contraceptives.
In some ways you can also thank the AIDS epidemic of the 80's and 90's for the movement that promoted safe sex and talking about prevention of STDs and unwanted pregnancies.
There is still a lot left to be desired in sex ed in school, so it is definitely the parents' job to teach their kids about sex and the consequences that come with it.
This post was edited on 3/4/15 at 12:46 pm
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:46 pm to SlowFlowPro
Good talk. Will you at least admit that a big driver of the world being "safer" for kids now (as in fewer crimes) is probably that parents are more protective than they used to be?
Personally I think that like most things it's complicated and that we need to find a balance between paranoid and laissez-faire raising of our children.
Personally I think that like most things it's complicated and that we need to find a balance between paranoid and laissez-faire raising of our children.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:48 pm to JonaYolles
I'm the wrong person to talk to about condoms. If one of my girls got pregnant in high school I would be much more upset that she had given herself to some kid that wasn't ready for it when she also wasn't ready for it than I would be that we were going to have a new family member.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:52 pm to uway
i can absolutely see your point of view, and respect that you have that mindset, though I believe that if children are going to have sex (and many of them will) in HS then they should know how best to protect themselves. Just as we make sure to give our children proper drivers ed before unleashing them on the road.
Your point of having a decline in dangers due to more protectiveness from parents holds some merit, but this is a very nuanced subject, and there is no one definitive answer. It's probably a multitude of things that are making things safer for the children of today.
Your point of having a decline in dangers due to more protectiveness from parents holds some merit, but this is a very nuanced subject, and there is no one definitive answer. It's probably a multitude of things that are making things safer for the children of today.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:52 pm to GreatLakesTiger24
TLDR
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:56 pm to JonaYolles
quote:
Your point of having a decline in dangers due to more protectiveness from parents holds some merit, but this is a very nuanced subject, and there is no one definitive answer. It's probably a multitude of things that are making things safer for the children of today.
A development that I didn't see SFP mention that actually is tied to this is the willingness of people to talk with their kids about their right to stop an adult from messing with them. The priest scandals wouldn't have happened if everyone had been willing to open their eyes. You just have to look at what goes on in some other places (like those "Asians" living in England who terrorized all of those little girls) to see what can happen when people refuse to see.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 12:59 pm to TIGRLEE
bullshite. Let your kid spend the night.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 1:56 pm to uway
quote:
Will you at least admit that a big driver of the world being "safer" for kids now (as in fewer crimes) is probably that parents are more protective than they used to be?
That seems unlikely to me given the overall precipitous drop in crime nationwide.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 2:10 pm to SirSaintly
you think you know more than Dr. James Dobson?
That's rich
That's rich
Posted on 3/4/15 at 2:57 pm to bigpetedatiga
I have to agree with your comment about not knowing what others have going on behind closed doors. This is slightly unrelated but stays course with your comment: My best gay male friend from childhood and college has been dating this guy, seemingly totally normal and nice, for 7-8 years. Said friend was a groomsman in our wedding, so both he and his boyfriend have been very involved in our lives over many years. Turns out his boyfriend was arrested last week for 20 counts of child pornography. Thousands of pictures of little kids found on his computer, allegedly. I was shocked, disgusted but scared to think that someone we thought we knew had such sick perversion like that. I then wondered if he was attracted to little kids like my almost two year old son, even. The scariest part is that he was the manager of the BR build a bear for a few years.
If nothing else that really proves that you really don't know people, even when you do. I shudder to think of the many hard decisions I will have to make in regards to my child, and I will just pray for wisdom and guidance along the way.
If nothing else that really proves that you really don't know people, even when you do. I shudder to think of the many hard decisions I will have to make in regards to my child, and I will just pray for wisdom and guidance along the way.
Posted on 3/4/15 at 3:02 pm to tigerbandpiccolo
you have a 2yr old? I need to pay attention more
Posted on 3/4/15 at 3:06 pm to CurDog
21ish months to be exact, or "that" parent, rather. But yeah, the only time he's ever stayed away from us was with my mother in law and once with our nanny. I Used to stay the night with friends growing up.. And sometimes it was just fun and games. Then other times we were getting into things we shouldn't have. So it will be one of those things we use good parenting (hopefully) when the time comes. I'm sure it will be situational.
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