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Message
re: My wife and I had an abortion. AMA
Posted on 6/26/22 at 10:45 pm to BigTimer085
Posted on 6/26/22 at 10:45 pm to BigTimer085
quote:
put a national 15 week ban in place
National?
NATIONAL??!?!?!??!
This is just simply a case of retuning an issue to the states right, small government conservatives?
0
Posted on 6/26/22 at 11:03 pm to GreenRockTiger
quote:
There’s a whole amendment about that in the constitution
Just remove the gun part of his post.
Posted on 6/26/22 at 11:23 pm to Jsand43
quote:
The only ones that care are the far right religious nut bags
Haven’t been to church in 30 years. I care. In the OP’s case it’s acceptable because it’s a medical condition. Rape is the other reason it’s ok. Getting knocked up because you aren’t responsible enough to practice any of the 100’s of birth control choices it’s by a reason to kill a baby. How about we just kill those adults for making irresponsible choices?? Does your tune change now??? No you’ll answer that’s murder. Well touché.
Posted on 6/26/22 at 11:28 pm to jglass3lsu
quote:That's because it's an alter account, that just signed up yesterday, to put this out there. Likelihood of him bullshitting the OT is about 95%. Otherwise, a man of principle on TD would post about this life experience under his own long-time known name instead of making up a new account.
Your ability to remain calm in your responses is impressive
That said, tough call for anyone under this condition.
Posted on 6/26/22 at 11:29 pm to Tigersonfire
quote:
How about we just kill those adults for making irresponsible choices??
We do that already.
Posted on 6/26/22 at 11:38 pm to FinleyStreet
quote:
This is just something Christians say to make themselves feel better. You won't pray for me. You'll forget about this conversation in an hour.
I did not forget. I prayed that this conversation planted a seed in your spirit. That the Lord would water it and turn your heart. May not be tonight, this week, etc.
But I pray the Lord draws you back to this thread, knowing that its confirmation that the Lord does love you. Jesus still cares for you. You're still wanted. Give him a chance. All it takes is the faith of a mustard seed.
Posted on 6/27/22 at 12:18 am to lsupride87
quote:
9,000 abortions a year in America ar for rape. If you want you can just tell those 9,000 girls to frick off, but to others we would like to maybe iron out the details even for the small percentage of cases
Now states can iron out those details, debate details, iron them out again if needed, be an issue in legislative races instead of passing it off as federal issue, and so on all without enduring a 4 year federal judicial process like what happened with the Mississippi law before even trying anything else.
This post was edited on 6/27/22 at 12:20 am
Posted on 6/27/22 at 1:17 am to BigTimer085
Hello Big Timer085,
I went through a similar situation but the difference was my sons heart did not beat hard enough leading to there was nothing to “fix”. Once he gained a certain weight, his heart would no longer support his body. That was at 36 weeks. Way longer than those high risk doctors(of whom I despise because of arrogance) predicted.
Having an option for abortion was never mentioned by my docs or even myself. I thought if I didn’t fight for him, who would? Instead I drove 350 miles round trip from Fairfield, TX to Austin, TX every single week for my high risk appointment for 16 weeks without blinking an eye. Many interns learned from my unfortunate circumstance. I was like a real life in the moment study. If they asked to put a giant needle through my belly to insert it in to his belly in order to gain fluid to study and and evaluate to perhaps save more babies in the future, it was a go for me.
On the flip side meaning home life. That little man never kicked harder than when I was reading to my 2 year old at the time. Every night before bed, her and I would read numerous books and enjoy the time with him. He loved hearing our voices together and shared those special moments connecting with him.
The only real difference in our stories are that I chose to carry out the pregnancy until he naturally died. I was a giant 36 week pregnant mom while your wife was 22 weeks and probably “showed” a bit but not enough for your 3 year old to realize what was going on.
And if your wondering about a child’s emotions at 26 months old. Three days after the delivery of her brother and back at home putting her down to sleep without our usual routine. I explained to her that bubby died and was not coming home. The sound she made was the same sound I made when the cowardly doctor was unable to say the words that my baby was dead. I had to say them out loud.
Everyone handles situations differently. I’m 8 years in and still trying to figure things out. All questions still remain unanswered. The fact you are the husband here ultimately asking for compassion is refreshing. Love your wife and continue to reassure each other you made the best decision you could together. In your situation, there is NO right answer. I hope you have all the healthy children you desire in the future.
These challenges will only make you both stronger in the end. And never waste time regretting the things you can not change. Look forward.
I went through a similar situation but the difference was my sons heart did not beat hard enough leading to there was nothing to “fix”. Once he gained a certain weight, his heart would no longer support his body. That was at 36 weeks. Way longer than those high risk doctors(of whom I despise because of arrogance) predicted.
Having an option for abortion was never mentioned by my docs or even myself. I thought if I didn’t fight for him, who would? Instead I drove 350 miles round trip from Fairfield, TX to Austin, TX every single week for my high risk appointment for 16 weeks without blinking an eye. Many interns learned from my unfortunate circumstance. I was like a real life in the moment study. If they asked to put a giant needle through my belly to insert it in to his belly in order to gain fluid to study and and evaluate to perhaps save more babies in the future, it was a go for me.
On the flip side meaning home life. That little man never kicked harder than when I was reading to my 2 year old at the time. Every night before bed, her and I would read numerous books and enjoy the time with him. He loved hearing our voices together and shared those special moments connecting with him.
quote:
All things considered, we decided to terminate the pregnancy at 22 weeks. There were many reasons we considered, and ultimately didn't want our 3 year old's first memory to be the death of baby sister.
The only real difference in our stories are that I chose to carry out the pregnancy until he naturally died. I was a giant 36 week pregnant mom while your wife was 22 weeks and probably “showed” a bit but not enough for your 3 year old to realize what was going on.
And if your wondering about a child’s emotions at 26 months old. Three days after the delivery of her brother and back at home putting her down to sleep without our usual routine. I explained to her that bubby died and was not coming home. The sound she made was the same sound I made when the cowardly doctor was unable to say the words that my baby was dead. I had to say them out loud.
Everyone handles situations differently. I’m 8 years in and still trying to figure things out. All questions still remain unanswered. The fact you are the husband here ultimately asking for compassion is refreshing. Love your wife and continue to reassure each other you made the best decision you could together. In your situation, there is NO right answer. I hope you have all the healthy children you desire in the future.
These challenges will only make you both stronger in the end. And never waste time regretting the things you can not change. Look forward.
Posted on 6/27/22 at 1:57 am to BigTimer085
quote:
Yes, I still feel shame about it. Yes, I often think about what could have been, but ultimately I believe we made the best choice for our family.
A close relative of mine was born with severe birth defects.
He was afflicted with all the same horrific odds as a baby, then a child and on into adulthood.
This guy survived against all odds and with extreme medical challenges. He made it to nearly 50, and was the toughest human I've ever met.
He worked every day he was able his entire adult life, until he was ultimately hospitalized.
His problems were nearly overwhelming but he persevered and became an inspiration for many.
His mom had the chance to abort but chose not to, and there has been no greater blessing to those that knew him.
Posted on 6/27/22 at 6:35 am to HubbaBubba
quote:
That's because it's an alter account, that just signed up yesterday
I figured that part was pretty obvious. The main reason for the alter is due to people on here who know me and work with my wife.
She doesn't want our business brought to her work.
quote:
Likelihood of him bullshiteting the OT is about 95%
Still 100% truthful.
Posted on 6/27/22 at 6:41 am to pelicanpride
quote:
I’m so sorry that there have been so many cruel people responding to your post.
It had been several years since this whole thing happened, and I understand this is an issue people are very passionate about. There has also been an equal amount of understand and supportive posts. The reason for sharing the story would be completely lost if I started responding to all the critical posts.
Posted on 6/27/22 at 6:42 am to Bawbs34C
quote:
And if your wondering about a child’s emotions at 26 months old. Three days after the delivery of her brother and back at home putting her down to sleep without our usual routine. I explained to her that bubby died and was not coming home. The sound she made was the same sound I made when the cowardly doctor was unable to say the words that my baby was dead. I had to say them out loud
This is heart wrenching.
I am so sorry.
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