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Dissatisfied customers review Haribo sugar free gummy bears

Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:01 pm
Posted by Jim Rockford
Member since May 2011
98184 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:01 pm
LINK

quote:

It all started the day prior when my sugar tooth persuaded me to eat 2 handfuls of these sugar-free delights. Fast forward 15 hours 23 minutes and 44 seconds, the world shook. All hell broke loose inside me, a sudden headache, my skin began to perspire and something tore around in my abdomen with force enough to make me latch onto my couch with both hands and let out a sheer cry that sent my dog retreating into the bedroom, she probably knew the battle was already lost. I tried to make for the bathroom but the pressure was so intense I had to wait it out on the couch until a lapse in the gut-busting occurred and I regained control of my muscles. It took only moments before the volcano Mt Anus had blown its top. The air quickly turned poisonous from the methane and sulfuric fumes that spewed forth. Violence and terror are understatements of what happened for the next 45 minutes. I sustained 3rd degree burns from contact with the lava that flowed abruptly from my bowels, my blood pressure was at record levels, and my body mass was reduced by 4 lbs. After ample ventilation of the crime scene I quickly took a shower and changed clothes because the powerful fumes had soaked through the fabric and into the skin. I almost had a mental breakdown in the shower after realizing those little gummy bears had nearly defeated such a man that I thought I was. I can now hardly bare to look forward through the night-terrors and PTSD that will come of this horrid event. . .


More at the link...
Posted by zelman
Bogan Walk
Member since Feb 2015
2400 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:02 pm to
Posted by VaBamaMan
North AL
Member since Apr 2013
7653 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:03 pm to
Welcome to the world of sugar replacements.
Posted by JumpingTheShark
America
Member since Nov 2012
22901 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:03 pm to
There are some great compilations of funny amazon reviews, my favorite is the banana slicer

quote:

What can I say about the 571B Banana Slicer that hasn't already been said about the wheel, penicillin, or the iPhone.... this is one of the greatest inventions of all time. My husband and I would argue constantly over who had to cut the day's banana slices. It's one of those chores NO ONE wants to do! You know, the old "I spent the entire day rearing OUR children, maybe YOU can pitch in a little and cut these bananas?" and of course, "You think I have the energy to slave over your damn bananas? I worked a 12 hour shift just to come home to THIS?!" These are the things that can destroy an entire relationship. It got to the point where our children could sense the tension. The minute I heard our 6-year-old girl in her bedroom, re-enacting our daily banana fight with her Barbie dolls, I knew we had to make a change. That's when I found the 571B Banana Slicer. Our marriage has never been healthier, AND we've even incorporated it into our lovemaking. THANKS 571B BANANA SLICER!
This post was edited on 8/27/15 at 11:07 pm
Posted by HeadyMurphey
Los Santos
Member since Jan 2008
17185 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:03 pm to
Is this in honor of the Katrina anniversary? It is just as old
Posted by Breesus
House of the Rising Sun
Member since Jan 2010
66982 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:04 pm to
quote:

There are some great compilations of funny amazon review


Endless entertainment
Posted by NewIberiaHaircut
Lafayette
Member since May 2013
11554 posts
Posted on 8/27/15 at 11:04 pm to
But who was 2012?
Posted by SUB
Member since Jan 2001
Member since Jan 2009
20829 posts
Posted on 8/28/15 at 8:24 am to
This is years old. You have 42,000 posts...come on baw

Still a good laugh for those who haven't read the reviews.
This post was edited on 8/28/15 at 8:25 am
Posted by musick
the internet
Member since Dec 2008
26125 posts
Posted on 8/28/15 at 8:29 am to
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