re: Jimmy Butler forgot his mic was on

Also 26 here

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It really showed me how many people keep their racism dormant. How something so simple by love could be frown upon by so many people baffles me. I've never heard so many people say "my parents told me to never date a black (guy/girl)" r " my parents explicitly said 'anyone but a black guy/girl'". Or "I could never bring you home."

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Parents usually want their children to avoid things that may ostracize them, and as commonplace as an interracial couple has become, it is still far from the norm. My family never echoed those sentiments, but even if they did, I don't think it always come from some "dormant racism". More often than not, I believe it stems from a fear of dealing with the general public.

For example, I've got children, and I want them to be happy first and foremost. However, I must admit that if it was up to me, I'd prefer if they end up heterosexual. Would I have any ill-will towards a homosexual child? No, of course not, but I know their life would be a bit more difficult. I don't believe I'm a bigot for having that opinion, just like I don't believe every parent of every white girl you met is a closet racist.

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Parents usually want their children to avoid things that may ostracize them, and as commonplace as an interracial couple has become, it is still far from the norm. My family never echoed those sentiments, but even if they did, I don't think it always come from some "dormant racism". More often than not, I believe it stems from a fear of dealing with the general public.

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That's fricking stupid, I'm sorry.

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You're usually pretty rational in this type of debate. Care to elaborate on what is so stupid?

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I just think it's rather selfish to prefer your kid to conform to the norm when it comes to matters of that nature for the sake of ease. It's not the same as wanting them to save money versus abusing a credit card, you know?

I just think it sends the wrong message.

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I wasn't trying to argue that it is the right way to do it. I just do not agree that a parent is automatically a racist for thinking that way. Selfish? Sure, but not necessarily a racist.

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I agree, to a very limited point. The sentiment may be born from a nurturing place, but when manifested, it most definitely comes off as racist (and I'm usually the last one to fly the :datsracist: flag)

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StrongSafety thinks all of these parents are racist based on how the message was delivered to/from their children.

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As someone who has only ever been romantically involved in IR relationships, I can understand his sentiment to a point. It's a very curious thing to be told to one's face "you're a good guy and I like you and all, but I could never go out with you for real because you're black."

Whether parents want their kids just to have an easier time or not, expressing that sentiment is hard to distinguish from racism.

My apologies for the tardy reply and for replying tersely earlier. Not cool on my part.