BREAKING: Aldon Smith is a moron

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Among the 31 video segments archived and publicly available is an installment entitled “Fire up session,” where Smith never appears on camera but his voice, unmistakable when compared to other videos where he talks directly to the camera, has a conversation with an unidentified female about a hand-rolled cigarette shown on screen.

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Male: They don’t have my name. This is just a fire up session.

Female: So, if you just put it on there...it’s just doing it? It’s live? That’s hella stupid.

Male: Shut up. You hella stupid. You trying to smoke, fam? Is this the ashtray?

Female: Yeah. You ain’t using it no more, right?

Male: I’m using it.

Female: Oh, that’s a (expletive deleted) (inaudible)? Oh, a (inaudible)?

Male: You’re stupid. You’re tripping. (Expletive deleted), they don’t know it’s me. It’s not like I put “Aldon Smith”…

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Smith’s suspension under the NFL substance abuse policy falls under Stage Three banishment, meaning he can apply for reinstatement 60 days before his suspension ends in November. The NFL must approve his reinstatement, which will only occur if he follows stipulations required by the league’s substance abuse policy.

Per the league’s substance abuse policy, the application must include information about the player’s: “(a) Treatment; (b) Abstinence from Substances of Abuse throughout the entire period of his banishment; (c) Involvement with any Substances of Abuse related incidents; and (d) Arrests and/or convictions for any criminal activity, including Substances of Abuse-related offense.”

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