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Started By
Message
F. King Alexander turns to TD to find cost-cutting measures
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:27 pm
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:27 pm
quote:
“These cuts are serious, but it will require some creative thinking in order to tackle them,” Alexander said. “So, I started a thread on TigerDroppings, and these are some of the best ideas I’ve seen.”
quote:
“One user, NotMike1234, offered the idea of creating a calendar featuring Mike the Tiger mascots posing in seductive manners,” Alexander said. “It’ll be sexy, but, you know, in a creepy way.”
Local experts predict the calendar could produce a total of $74 in additional revenue for the University.
quote:
When asked if students would willingly donate their winnings back to the University, Alexander shared plans to torment students who didn’t comply.
“I mean, someone who didn’t want to give back to the University could potentially have their car towed every day,” Alexander said.
Alexander’s most revolutionary idea included turning off the lights to Tiger Stadium at night.
“Yeah, I don’t think any of us realized those were actually on,” Alexander said. “Does anyone know how to turn them off?”
The measure is expected to save the University thousands of dollars this year in energy costs.
SATIRE
8
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:30 pm to kingbob
If it's not too late I would like to submit that F. King Alexander resign as a cost cutting measure.
Not satire.
Not satire.
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:30 pm to kingbob
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:33 pm to kingbob
HILARIOUS
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:34 pm to Rouge
Love it. Trump U
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:36 pm to kingbob
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:36 pm to kingbob
Kinda sad that they have to include
Right at the beginning.
It kinda ruins the whole point of satire.
quote:
This article is purely satire and meant for the readers’ enjoyment.
Right at the beginning.
It kinda ruins the whole point of satire.
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:42 pm to UGATiger26
quote:
Kinda sad that they have to include
quote:
This article is purely satire and meant for the readers’ enjoyment.
Right at the beginning.
It kinda ruins the whole point of satire.
Agreed, but the problem is our journalists are simply too dumb and too obsessed with being quick on the draw that these sorts of disclaimers are necessary to avoid another national embarrassment for the University just because some idiot blogger at CNN didn't check his facts before spinning it over the airwaves.
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:46 pm to kingbob
The reveille trying to stay relevant?
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:50 pm to TH03
quote:
The reveille trying to stay relevant?
Were they ever?
Posted on 3/11/16 at 2:55 pm to kingbob
What they need to do is set up Mike the mascot with a professional photographer where pictures are taken a number of times a year. Football scene, Christmas, Basketball, Easter/ Baseball, etc.
Posted on 3/11/16 at 3:19 pm to kingbob
Trump University. quote:
F. King Alexander
No satire.....this guy needs to be shown the door.
This post was edited on 3/11/16 at 3:21 pm
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