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Started By
Message
Children Deciding Which Parent to Live With
Posted on 5/2/19 at 8:59 am
Posted on 5/2/19 at 8:59 am
At what age can a minor decide where he wants to live?
My son lives with me 60% of the time (mostly school year) and goes to his Mom’s house the other 40% (mostly summer time - she lives 65 minutes away).
He is 14 and asked for a 75/25 split (with one week at his moms and one week at my house, alternating for the summer vacation).
My lawyer said a court won’t allow a 14 year old to make this decision and that it doesn’t help that I’d be at work most of the summer.
The lawyer said wait until he is 15-16.
Can any OT folks shed some light on this type of custody issue?
Updates: The mom moved away
She works as a nurse but has a new hubby who is a “stay at home” dad.
My son lives with me 60% of the time (mostly school year) and goes to his Mom’s house the other 40% (mostly summer time - she lives 65 minutes away).
He is 14 and asked for a 75/25 split (with one week at his moms and one week at my house, alternating for the summer vacation).
My lawyer said a court won’t allow a 14 year old to make this decision and that it doesn’t help that I’d be at work most of the summer.
The lawyer said wait until he is 15-16.
Can any OT folks shed some light on this type of custody issue?
Updates: The mom moved away
She works as a nurse but has a new hubby who is a “stay at home” dad.
This post was edited on 5/2/19 at 11:11 am
20
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:01 am to Guido Merkens
Maybe listen to your lawyer instead of coming to a message board?
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:01 am to Guido Merkens
The age varies in different states.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:03 am to Boudreaux35
The state is Louisiana.
He is at that age where he feels he is missing out w/ his school friends.
He is at that age where he feels he is missing out w/ his school friends.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:03 am to Guido Merkens
The court makes the final decision, but absolutely takes the child’s request into consideration. The bad part is having to have your child involved in this decision.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:04 am to Guido Merkens
quote:
He is 14 and asked for a 75/25 split (with one week at his moms and one week at my house, alternating for the summer vacation).
quote:
court won’t allow a 14 year old to make this decision
then, how about the parents make the decision.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:05 am to Guido Merkens
Had a friend who went through this as a kid and the court took his opinion into account (not sure how much they really listened but they let him give input at least)
We were 12 or 13
We were 12 or 13
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:05 am to Guido Merkens
Look up the state statute/law regarding this
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:08 am to MorbidTheClown
His mom doesn’t want him alone at my house while I’m at work all day.
She is overprotective, even though he is home alone from 3pm - 5:15 pm each day after school.
She is overprotective, even though he is home alone from 3pm - 5:15 pm each day after school.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:10 am to Guido Merkens
It depends on the judge and also the child. If he is a mature 14 year old the judge may take his preference into account as long as he/she sees both parents as suitable. There is no set age at which they can decide and it all depends on how heavily your judge lets the child preference weigh in. I just went through this and the judge took my 12 year olds (at the time) thoughts very seriously. She is also very smart, mature, and will probably be a lawyer herself one day. So ask around about the judge's history with input from kids. Odds are you lawyer has dealt with this judge before and has a good idea of where they stand.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:13 am to geaux1976
Thanks Geaux76, that’s the best advice I’ve heard yet.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:18 am to Guido Merkens
You and your Ex are the parents.
You two should at least be able to work together for the betterment of your child. Leave the lawyers and courts out of raising your children. You've likely paid the enough already. Save your money.
You don't have to like each other to do whats beat for your child without it being a production.
Me an my ex's relationship got exponentially better when we realized this.
Good luck.
You two should at least be able to work together for the betterment of your child. Leave the lawyers and courts out of raising your children. You've likely paid the enough already. Save your money.
You don't have to like each other to do whats beat for your child without it being a production.
Me an my ex's relationship got exponentially better when we realized this.
Good luck.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:19 am to Guido Merkens
What state? Texas is 12 or 13 for a chambers meeting with the judge. The child doesn't get final say, but the judge is supposed to give serious weight to the child's desire.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:20 am to Cump11b
quote:
Cump11b
just want to say your AVI pic is
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:27 am to AU_251
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:27 am to Mid Iowa Tiger
The state is Louisiana
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:35 am to Guido Merkens
the child can't make their own decision legally until 17 or 18...........HOWEVER, a judge may take a child's word into consideration after they are around 13-14 years old.
also, any plan that doesn't show each parent TRYING to accommodate whats best for the child, is frowned upon.
That'll be $2,500 please.
also, any plan that doesn't show each parent TRYING to accommodate whats best for the child, is frowned upon.
That'll be $2,500 please.
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:36 am to caliegeaux
quote:
the child can't make their own decision legally until 17 or 18.
depends on the state, MS or AL can raise that to 19, that will be $3500 please
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:37 am to 777Tiger
we were talking about Louisiana.
$4,500 please
$4,500 please
Posted on 5/2/19 at 9:39 am to caliegeaux
quote:
we were talking about Louisiana.
quote:
$4,500 please
didn't specify, five grand will do please
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