re: Weight loss and staying in shape, it isn't that difficult.

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and according to my fit bit I burn 4000 calories a day

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Fitbit isn't accurate. In fact, all fitness watches aren't accurate. Look into getting a Polar. Polar is what the medical industry and professionals use. The most accurate is their chest strap.

You need to get a true RMR test done to determine how many calories you burn then go from there to add your exercise.

I did an RMR test and found out I only burn right at 2000 calories per day just living. From there I was able to get a good idea of my total burn including work outs and adjusted my caloric intake for the weight I wanted to lose.

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Yet Ill be lucky to lose 2 pounds a week at most and sometimes even gain weight.

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2 pounds per week isn't bad and is about average. Also, you aren't gaining if you are truly in a caloric deficit. Chances are it's water weight fluctuation.